Alcoholic intervention??

Question

I am posting my same question under diff category due to lack of responses. Has anyone ever been part of an intervention? My husband is an alcoholic who drinks literally 24/7- mixes whiskey and coke at work to keep the shakes away. We have three kids- 7, 4, and 2 and I swear our lives revolve around his drinking. He has tried quitting many times over the last 3 1/2 yrs but won't follow his dr's plan or go to AA cuz he thinks he can do this on his own. There is a tremendous strain on our marriage, but I don't want to give up on him. I do love him and he is a good person, but I can't sit and watch him kill himself any longer. I tried stopping him from taking our 7 yr old to the store today- along w/ a traveler for the ride- but he wouldn't listen and took him anyways. What do I do?? I need some advice from anyone in my shoes or have been there! Is an intervention the answer? He has admitted to have a problem and wants to change, but he's so far deep in it. Help!!

Answer 1

i have been in aa ca ma for years. i know all the things you should think about. this is a hard thing for you because of the kids. for one, you should go to a alanon meeting for other spouces who have the same peoblem, they will help you to deal with it. please go !!!!!!! if he drives with your kids drunk, you MUST call the police on him. this is tough love. i know. i have had it done to me. i have repented and so far been on the right road. i cant say i will always be, but with support i am making it. my mom was so concerned about me, she called the police and had me committed. i hated her, but then after the disease left me, i loved her more. write me or call me at [e-mail] or phone me at 715-479-1133
this is something that God asks us to all help each other out on. you cannot help him. you must seek alanon for your own help. hope you understand. you cannot do anything but help yourself with alanon. he is in denail about helping himself. drunks always think....hey i am ok i can just quit anytime or cutback. you cant. it is a switch that cant be turned off. others can have one drink and be ok. some just cant stop. dont blame him, dont hate him, go for help for you and the kids. trust me, read up on it. alanon. it works for you to understand how to cope. it is a life saver. hope to hear from you and I will pray and pray to God about your family.

Answer 2

I agree . . . Go to Alanon. I hesitate to say this, but by not being firm with your husband, you are enabling his use and making some poor choices that endangered your children. Allowing him to drive impaired with a child is NOT a good choice. One way was to tell him NO, and to tell him if he persisted you would call the police.

You stated you and the kids's life revolves around his 24/7 drinking. That is just "crazy" to admit that and still stay around. Alchoholism doesn't just effect the alchoholic ... your example shows how it effects the whole family. Alanon will help you understand that.

If he persists you actually may have to "give up" on him. His relationship is NOT with you or the children. His "family" is his booze and drinking pals. An invtervention may work . . . it certainly is worth it to take the chance. But you need to take care of yourself and the kids.

Answer 3

Your husband will not get help until he truly wants to quit drinking. He can go to rehab, but if he doesn't go because he truly wants to quit ...then it will be a waste of time and money. He has to get it in his heart first, and then get it in his head. For an addicted person to get clean and sober, first HE has to be ready and the family has to be strong. It sounds like you are co-dependent and you also need help in order to help him. The worst thing you can continue to do is to enable him to continue this behavior. Your first and only consideration should be your children and their safety and well being. Your husband is not capable as long as he is drinking 24/7 to feel anything for anyone except the alcohol and himself. The addict/alcoholic is a very selfish person and is numbing all feelings about everything. First, take care of yourself and your children...if he does not sincerely want to get clean and sober...save yourself and your kids from a lifetime of heartache. Good luck and be safe.

Answer 4

An intervention is a good idea if you're really prepared to follow through with it. That is, family and friends typically threatened to cut ties with the addict if he/she doesn't get get serious professional help for their problem and maintain sobriety or whatever is appropriate to their addiction. Are you really ready to do this?

Also, what supports do you have in place to make the intervention a success? Are there family and friends who would join you in staging this ultimatum?

Finally, do you think your husband really wants to change? You say he recognizes his problem and wants to change but refuses professional help. That doesn't sound like a guy who's prepared to give up his drug of choice!

Good luck.

Answer 5

What most intervention experts would say to do is tough love. Tell him to get help (maybe check into a alcoholic center for a few weeks - covered by most insurances) or you will take the kids and leave him. It is not good for your kids to be around this nor you.

Answer 6

you ought to locate out the muse info first . How plenty she is eating each and every day/week , what she is eating and maximum critically , even nevertheless she says she would not comprehend why , you ought to locate out what is going on in her existence that could perhaps impact eating as a convenience for her . Then , you ought to touch an AA intervention software or something alongside those lines to commence the help technique . even nevertheless it seems extremely heroic to help her throughout your self , human beings have went to college to help others who go through with those forms of issues . She needs help nevertheless , the 1st step to studying a answer to a important concern is to admit it to somebody , and he or she has taken that first step . good success .

Answer 7

Interventions are rated the most effective method for recovery, BUT the chances of it being successful go down the more severe the problem is and whether or not they have ever been treated before.

"What works?" (several recovery methods listed by effectiveness: note that AA is ranked 38th out of 48):
http://www.behaviortherapy.com/whatworks.htm

Answer 8

Your husband needs to get into a rehab ASAP He needs to detox off of alcohol and this needs to be done under medical supervison as it can be very dangerous. After he detox's he will need counseling and a day treatment program which will educate him and provide him with the tools and structure to get better-----he will also need a suport group such as AA. If he is truly wanting to change then he will do whatever it takes to achieve this-----an intervention can be helpful in that it brings several people who love him and can share with him what they know about his drinking-------blessings.

Answer 9

He will only change if he wants too' and he has to change everything his friends' everything that he drinks to, with, around, fore, everything and only he can do that, and really believe in gods intervention, yes I know what I'm talking about.

Answer 10

I have never been part of one but it appears from what you write that he is in need of one and it could help...

for more information, resources, check out the following two online sites:

http://www.nationalinterventionreferral.org/?google

http://www.411intervention.com/