I am bisexual (I rate myself a Kinsey 4), and I just say that whomever I settle down with will be the person I settle with, whetever the sex. My mother on the other hand, tells me that it should be a man, because I shouldn't put a woman through the possiblility that I am really "totally gay." It might have something to do with the fact that my brother was with a lesbian who came out only after six years into the relationship (she believed she could "change" and is really a good person.....just what religion can do to a mind I guess) ...I am going out with a woman right now, and my mother keeps bringing this up....I don't want to "argue" with her....Wht can I do....suggestions?
2007-01-21 10:05:38 · 18 answers · asked by Philip Kiriakis 5 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
"homosexualityexplained...," I am a man, fyi......lol........you are just too much.....
2007-01-21 10:13:52 · update #1
Kedar, I AM lucky in the respect that despite the demographic probability, my parents are fully accepting of my homosexuality (we are hispanic, they are church-going Catholics) - they just "wonder" about my bisexuality. I am just not the kind of son who will sit and pontificate on Kinsey etc.......Be well, best of luck, much love....
2007-01-21 10:16:46 · update #2
Ummmm....I think I need an avatar other than propped up feet to indicate that I'm a man given some of these answers....It's all good though.....I appreciate all of the thoughtful responses and stories.
2007-01-21 10:35:50 · update #3
lol I usually hear the opposite of your story... I usually hear "Go ahead and do all the exploring you want, but settle down with a nice opposite-sex person."
Well to me it sounds like your mom is reacting to the situation with your bro and his ex. I guess it would be important for you to let her know you're different than his ex because you are not hiding from yourself. You know who you like. Maybe saying something to her like that it's not the gender of the person you fall in love with, it's their soul that you fall in love with. Maybe that will help her to see that you're not with a woman just to try passing.
I think that if you can find a way to get her to understand bisexuality and how it is different from being completely on one end of the scale or the other that might help. And that's a series of conversations that you can have without even talking about who you choose to settle down with.
Sorry I don't have more ideas. My Catholic mother still doesn't get the concept of bisexuality herself. Makes for some interesting conversations. I'm happy that you have someone you're happy with and I hope that you are able to work things out with your mom soon.
2007-01-21 10:54:40 · answer #1 · answered by Jen 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i'd say it is purely sexist in case you follow a double generic. Are you conservative, prim, proper and do not sleep round? if so, then i'd say you're searching for someone of similar temperament and priorities. in case you should "sow your wild oats" previously settling down and sleep with as many women folk as feasible then i'd say you're preserving your destiny spouse to a common that you at the prompt are not preserving your self to. which will be sexist: that it is positive for a guy to sleep with many companions, yet no longer a lady.
2016-10-15 21:58:04 · answer #2 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow. That's an interesting and refreshing situation. I wish mine would say something like that! Anyways, I'd suggest just asking her to drop the subject.
2007-01-21 16:35:24 · answer #3 · answered by carora13 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your mother wants a man for you and you are here asking a question?
Gosh! wish my mother wanted the same thing for me.
Your mother does have a point, though, since society actually accepts gays a tiny bit more than bi's, and most hetero women don't seem equipped to deal with a bi husband.
2007-01-21 10:09:59 · answer #4 · answered by Kedar 7 · 6⤊ 0⤋
Settle down with who you want. You should be glad you have a mother to meddle in your affairs. I'm not that lucky.
2007-01-21 10:22:25 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
i see what you mean. im straight as of now ( i mite be bi) and i told my mom and the first thign she said to me is oh well atleast u still like girls. i told her if i dont wind up dating a girl tough luck sucks for her. its hard. just tell ur mom how u feel and its UR life she CANNOT control your life
2007-01-21 10:24:30 · answer #6 · answered by mike 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You do what you want.. Your mother had the right to settle down with who she wanted to. So do you. Its your life hon so live it proud in any way you want to.
2007-01-21 10:10:34 · answer #7 · answered by Chris 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
some parents just dont want to go through the fact they raised a "failure". You are never a failure for following what u think is right. Dont listen to her.
2007-01-21 10:09:50 · answer #8 · answered by penpal_247 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I think that after what she has been trough, she might be wanting grandchildren. If your with a woman, she won't get a biological one. Of course I'm not aware of your family's situation. Please don't think that I'm closed minded just because I'm straight.
2007-01-21 10:16:52 · answer #9 · answered by D.Y. 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I can't answer honestly without getting a violation notice so I'll lie to you. She wants what's best for you.
2007-01-21 10:12:04 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋