I may have my faults and I will be the first to admit that I am a work in progress and always need to improve, but why dont people think before they speak and why do people feel the "need" to offer unsolicted advice?
For example a realtive said to me Oh you cannot have children and you had surgery to prevent kids because of medical and financial reasons you should come to terms with it accept it and go on?
I was aghast and caught off guard that anyone would say such a thing knowing damn well all I ever wanted was children. I deal with this all the time and we dont feel led to adopt.
Why do people always feel like they have the god given right to try to verbally "fix" what is wrong with a poor choice of words?
I would NEVER say anything like that do someone exspeically if I knew they could not conceive or have children? How can I make certain I never become uncompassionate or insenstive to peoples needs?
2007-01-21 09:26:53 · 20 answers · asked by encourager4God 5 in Society & Culture ➔ Other - Society & Culture
You know i myself cannot have children. I have never really run across such insensitive people myself but when things like that do arise i just brush it off as "this person has no brains" and i shut them out! don't let it bother you so much its not worth it and life is way to short. Not having children doesn't bother me so much anymore because believe it or not I'm a GRANDMA yes the man i married has children of his own and i think of them as mine to! They treat me like a mom. you ll be OK. Just dont let people bug you!
2007-01-21 09:51:35 · answer #1 · answered by classyladyonly 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Ever stop to think why so many people prefer this (Yahoo Answers) type of communicating?
Could it be it's so impersonal and doesn't amount to anything?
When you have relatives and friends who shoot the breeze without thinking first about what they say, then you see what I mean.
Too often, people place too much importance on what people tell them, and eventually they learn that people will say and do what they please. What matters most is how you can cope with it, and turn a deaf ear.
You know yourself better than anyone else does.
Trust in yourself before you begin trusting others.
2007-01-21 09:34:53 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
it's a habit or they don't care and just wanna speak their feelings and thoughts even though sometimes it could be wrong
2015-10-19 12:01:27 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
When people say things like that why not just say something like "thank you for those pearls of wisdom, I hadn't realised you had been through this situation yourself as I'm sure you aren't the type of person to just say something with no experience or knowledge of it".
Then smile, pat her hand and walk away.
I say this to people when they comment on a personal situation I have, it's friendly & they're never sure if it's meant or not but it does get them thinking about what they said
2007-01-21 09:35:42 · answer #4 · answered by madamspud 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you should say what your feeling to this person. Tell them why it hurt you and what it was that made you upset.
Also disassociate yourself from this ignoramus. You've enough grief in life to be worrying about without this nincompoop trampling all over your feelings.
At the end of the day you can only carry yourself with grace and dignity so try not to worry about this person.
It sounds like to me that you're a caring person, you're not likely just to 'become' insensitive.
Good luck with life!
Be happy.
2007-01-21 09:35:37 · answer #5 · answered by hen 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Why not? That's a serious answer too.
Is being different from you wrong? Should we always treat you as you always want to be treated?
Everyone is entitled to their opinions, and if you don't want those opinions, either reject them with reason or bury your head in the sand and go "LALALALA!!"
Also, for the other answerers, just because someone doesn't fit yor moral code doesn't mean they're ignorant or stupid, that's just you spilling your tactless emotions out. And yeah i called them tactless.
Unsolicited advice? Might as well warn them not to give you any advice each time you talk to them. Or anyone.
But hey, if it makes you sleep at night, call them morons or insensitive or whatever.
2007-01-21 09:30:37 · answer #6 · answered by Quack Man 1 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Because most poeple find it easier to blurt out illogical responses fueled by emotional impulses and call it "truth" rather than actually thinking. Thinking takes work. Emotional rants are easier.
2007-01-21 09:31:38 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
Keep an open mind of the poor use of words that have been said to you.Some people dont think when they speak becouse they them self dont keep an open mind.
2007-01-21 09:32:41 · answer #8 · answered by SANCHA 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Some people have absolutely no tact -nothing you can do about it except consider the source of their ignorance.
Don't worry, if you are not like that now, you probably won't ever be.
2007-01-21 09:31:59 · answer #9 · answered by T Time 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
They dont realize their negative thoughts and just blurt them out.
U got to ignore most of it anyway.
If it aint a compliment or a positive quote, it is not worth listening to.
2007-01-21 09:30:30 · answer #10 · answered by sunflare63 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋