Why are overweight women trying to make being overweight sexy?

Question

A lot of times when you tell an overweight women that you perfer toned, thin, or women of average weight they become so insulted. I hear a lot of comments from them like "why would you want a bony girl when you can have a curvacious girl with meat on her bones" or "what are you a child molester going after girls with no **** or *** that are built like little boys?". I'm not saying that men should hate or insult overweight women but honestly its just not as attractive to most men. Like most women want a man bigger then them, most men want women that are smaller then them. I just hate seeing these women wear clothes way to small for them and then get defensive when you don't find them attractive.

Answer 1

As an overweight woman, the defensiveness comes from the fact that MOST of society says that being overweight is unattractive. Thus, most us feel as if we aren't good enough or attractive enough to get dates. So, basically, many overweight woman try to make themselves attractive to men through sexy dress and their confidence in order to compensate for their weight. I struggle with this issue all the time - Do I learn to be comfortable in my skin and stay alone OR do I starve myself to become thin so I can get a man? Both seem like unpleasant options.

Answer 2

Everyone has an opinion and a right to that opinion. However, unless directly asked for your opininon, it sould be kept to yourself, unless you are engaged in a conversation with someone you know in which it would be appropriate to express your opinion. Now, some men do actually find thicker women very beautiful. Others as yourself do not. It is unfortunate that most of the population of the United States is overweight, but this is fact. The average size women is a size 14. A size 14 these days is the equivalent to something like an 18 some years back. The clothing industry got smarter and realized a woman who really wears an 18 would rather buy a 14 if she could. It is all phycological. Just the way they put flattering lighting and bend the mirrors in womens dressing rooms to make her appear thinner. They are fooling a lot of people with these methods. I think a spade should be called a spade. Any way you look at these methods, it is misleading to the public. In fact. most larger women do feel very attractive and are surprised when someone like yourself does not think so. Some women have a distorted view of their body image; thin women really thinking they are overweight and become anorexic or bulimic. The same can be said of overwight women, who do not see themselves as overweight.

Anyway, you do have a right to your opinion, but perhaps, it would be better to give a kinder response to an overweight person. This world is harsh enough on people who are perceived as being different. However, just as I said earlier, the majority of people in the U.S. are overweight, and that would put you in the minority. Interesting, isn't it.

Just some food for thought.

Answer 3

When do you have these conversations? You say "a lot of times when you tell overweight.....they become so insulted". How often do you talk to overweight women about you preferences? Are you extremely attractive to overweight women or do you know lots and lots of them and do you have the kind of relationship in which it's normal to talk about your preferences? And do you comment on their choice of clothes out of your own accord or do they ask you what you think of their clothing? Honestly, I don't think I've ever talked to an overweight guy/girl about these issues. I think people might react defensive because we live in a society where thin is the "must be" but (a bit of) fat is the reality and people (especially women) feel like they're considered to be less worthy because of their looks. And often they are considered less worthy. Especially women.

Answer 4

Curvacious is one thing, obese is another story. Some people just have a curvier build as opposed to the rectangular shape favored for European and American models. The majority of women likely don't have a rectangular shape, so the insult could come from the fact you're admiring something that is pretty much nonexistant other than in images. We don't all look like tall Russian women for a reason.

Answer 5

I agree with you that women should wear clothes that fit, stretching stretch pants out so far they look like sausage casing does no one any favors. But tell me something God-man, who gave you the right to pass judgment not only on the well rounded, but all the other men who love the well rounded? You do not by a long shot speak for all men, there are even those men who love a woman for what they are, and not what size they are. I am happy that some women love tall men and others love short men. Why would you be in a position of telling so many women you won't love them because you like only skinny women unless you are sticking your nose in their business or you are leading them on? There are enough men in this world for all women, no fat woman needs a person such as yourself.

Answer 6

We are inundated with images of what a sexy woman is supposed to look like. Nearly all of them are air-brushed, even the models and actresses don't actually look like that.

Imagine what that does to a woman's sense of herself and her sexuality. Those are received standards, but we treat them as absolutes. Just look at Renaissance art, preternaturally thin hasn't always been considered appealing.

What I've found with all of the women and men that I've loved is that there is something beautiful and attractive and sexy in every person. We need to expand the conventions, not criticize people for not meeting them.

Women who are overweight are getting a bad head trip from every angle. I know from my own personal experience how bad it is and I'm not even close to overweight, despite the fact that I am perpetually convinced that I need to lose ten pounds. Be kind to all of us.

Answer 7

Actually, it isn't the women trying to make overweight sexy, it's the men who love overweight women. Men like what they like, and some like the bony girls with no figure looking like gangly teenaged boys, and others like curvy women who look like they can actually bear a few children. Women never try to make overweight sexy, but I will say that there are some skanks fat and skinny who need to cover up. So do'nt just pick on the fat ones, the skinny ones look just as awful and skanky.

Answer 8

I don't have a problem with overweight people until they try to show it off. I don't want to see your belly hanging out or your arm fat and I definitely do not want to see your *** crack. I don't want to see that on skinny people but much less fat people. Thankfully, most don't do that but there are some that do and think it looks good.

Edited to say that I would rather see women with meat on their bones. Stick thin girls are just not very pretty.

Answer 9

Most over weight women are quite self conscious. That comes from being put down for their weight problems. Sometimes it is a problem that can be fixed by diet, sometimes not. The last thing they want to hear is no one wants to date them because of their weight. It is possible it is their way of striking back. Might I add the same holds true for over weight men.

Answer 10

Those are just the ugly chunky girls with the rolls .*shivers*. If you like slender chicks that's awesome no one should correct your tastes..but to say that ALL overweight/ bigger chicks are ugly or not sexy is incorrect in my opinion. There are some absolutely gorgeous women that are plus sized.