I think that my ex boyfriend might be gay. We had sex once in the three years we were together, I always tried to iniciate it but he refused me everytime.
He just moved to Seattle to go to the University and he tells me how gay guys are hitting on him and buying him drinks. It doenst bother him but I dont think he tells them if he is straight or gay because he is unsure.
So my question is this, how did you know you were gay and does this sound to you like someone confused about their sexuality?
Also his mom and dad are still married and his dad is an ordained minister so its possible he is hiding it because of his family situation.
Advice please?
2007-01-21 07:23:35 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
I think that your boyfriend is gay. I'm extremely happy, however, that you seem to be taking it so well, because that will help both of you get through this a lot easier. You should talk to him, let him know that you're okay with it and that he can tell you (but be careful, you do risk offending him.) As long as you give him your reasons for your suspicion he shouldn't be offended.
This is the same situation (almost exactly, the only difference being that his parents weren't together) that my best friend went through. Only, while he was away from his girlfriend, he was having sex with men.
I don't think your boyfriend is confused, just ashamed
2007-01-21 07:37:24 · answer #1 · answered by Dopple 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If there is no connection between a man and a woman it does not mean that man is gay as much as it doesn't mean she is either.
I your boyfriend never dated and really had no interest in the normal hetero male direction, like sex ,then you have one part of it working for him being gay.
He may not be so into you like that so you cant judge him by that entirely. If he is out with gays and seems attracted to men and then perhaps he is.
You should know one thing and that is;
If he wasn't what you wanted and you were not satisfied with the relationship and you ended it then good for you!
Now then move on and don't worry about his being gay or not.
Worry about you and why you would pick an unobtainable man for yourself, a man that doesn't give you what you want.
Why you would stay 3 years with a man you made love with once, I don't call that boyfriend - girlfriend I call that two friends that had sex once.
Work on yourself and find out what are you all about! That would be more helpful!
2007-01-21 11:00:31 · answer #2 · answered by Crampy Grampy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have you ever considered the fact that he might be bisexual or like both genders?
Also, I knew I was bisexual from growing up and having crushes on people all around me ect. of both boys and girls if that helps?
And just because you both haven't had sex how would that make him a gay guy? He could be straight for all we know?
Just because a guy doesn't have sex with you, doesn't make him gay. Maybe you should be honest with him and just ask?
2007-01-21 07:36:10 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Time to get a new boyfriend. Let it go. He's meeting new people and you will too. I think it's odd how he is telling you all about the guys who are hitting on him though.
2007-01-21 08:23:33 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
life can be confusing. we are brought up in a culture of "straight" ... i had girlfriends but they always seemed more like "best girlfriends" as opposed to "i want to sleep with her" girlfriends.. trying to have sex was very uncomfortable.. i just thought i was nervous.. a couple years later, i was with some buddies at a sports event and caught myself looking at one of my buddies "that way" it was like, wow, he's sexy. i actually started getting hard..
that was a while ago, but recently i've come to accept i have bi feelings. not really sure if one or the other is stronger.
bottom line, for me it's not about sex. i want love, friendship, trust, respect, etc.. romance you know?
anyway, if he is your ex, then his sexuality shouldn't really matter to you. .move on with your life and look for another guy who is not confused about his sexuality. you deserve a guy who can make you happy, simple as that! good luck!
2007-01-21 07:38:37 · answer #5 · answered by Jeff 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
My parents are both deceased and even they know your former beau is gay.
I'm not sure what sort of advice you are seeking. If you are wondering whether to confront him about it, I'd say no. If you are planning to tell his parents, I'd say no. If you're wondering how you should respond when he finally tells you, just be his friend.
2007-01-21 08:02:41 · answer #6 · answered by castle h 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is gay, and maybe he wants to tell you, because it seems as though ya'll still have a good relationship as friends.
2007-01-21 09:14:40 · answer #7 · answered by Finally home 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you already know the answer. He does not sound confused at all. He was raised certain way and it takes time to overcome it. Once he does he will accept himself and be very happy.
2007-01-21 07:34:54 · answer #8 · answered by Tegarst 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
well to be honest< I can't answer this quest". But I wish you well with your search for the answer. I can add this though> I get all my answers from God. maybe it's just a suggestion, but it's always worked for me.
2007-01-25 05:37:07 · answer #9 · answered by djdjr01 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Since I figured out what sex was I knew what I was.
2007-01-21 07:40:19 · answer #10 · answered by PARKERD 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋