At times I'm afraid of talking to people, I'm afraid of being an intrusion and that I wouldn't even know what to say when I got into a conversation. In conversations I am really nervous cause at times I can't keep up my end, same thing with phone convos. Online I'm perfectly alright but in person or on the phone my conversation skills go out the window. What are some ways I can improve my conversation skills and social skills with people? thanks so much
2007-01-21 07:14:49 · 5 answers · asked by Mr Hawk 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
social skills like any other take practice the more you do it the more comfortable you will be with it. One really useful tip though, most people love to talk about themselves so ask questions, particularly open questions that's ones you can't easily answer yes or no to. for example rather than Did you have a good day? which could be answered yes or no, What did you do today? then they have to explain something.
what, when, where, why, how and who are the open question starters. so What do you do for a living, why did you decided to become and astrophysisist, how long have you lived here. You get the idea. Trainee salesmen are told you have 1 mouth but 2 ears so spend most of your time listening. Also if the person you are conversing with starts speaking, you stop and listen to them. These simple conversation skills will have your friends thinking your are the perfect party guest without you doing any work at all.
Complements also get you a very long way. For example if you want to join a conversation in a social gather try "Excuse me I couldn't help overhearing what you were saying about your....(job, dog, recent experience in outer space....whatever) That's very interesting so your dog can actually spell then (or whatever seems appropriate)?" and let them continue. You can get tips on keeping the conversation flowing as well.
Once you have people on a subject they are interested in you don't need to do much, "Really?" and "That's fascinating" can go along way. Occasionally you may think of your own story to tell which you can add in but most people just love to talk. Even if it's something you know nothing about just say, "I don't know anything about ............ at all it sound fascinating."
If you need topics of interest to talk about it's best to be up on what's going on in the news and it's useful to have a good book on the go so you can talk about that but if you are not the book type recent films or TV shows can also be a good topic.
I think your main problem is that you are a bit shy so an element of acting is useful. Imagine you are doing an acting job and you have to act like an extremely confident young man, what would he say and do? Do that. It may seem like you are being false but you will soon relax and start being yourself, it's only a technique to get over that difficult first step.
Hope these tips help, I'm very shy myself though nobody would know it so I know how you feel. Now get out there and socialise.
2007-01-21 07:37:02 · answer #1 · answered by gerrifriend 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
social situations role play with family or friends - someone you can trust. check out the library for some books on socialization too. though from my own experience, the coworkers that are spending their time making others look bad, usually get caught (if not this job, the next one) because what goes around comes around. just remember that. be true to yourself.
2016-05-24 06:53:24 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can start improving by chatting with people on yahoo messenger then try in real life.
2007-01-21 07:19:34 · answer #3 · answered by LynX 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
keep asking questions.. this keeps the conversation going and just keep trying...im working at it myself...
2007-01-21 08:19:20 · answer #4 · answered by vincent m 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
picture them in their underwear lol
2007-01-21 07:44:32 · answer #5 · answered by LaLaLaa♥ 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋