We have been together for 4 months. We are both at college. She says she is going for it next week, and if I want to remain friends with her, I will have to keep my big mouth closed.
2007-01-21 04:31:12 · 48 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
It appears that she has you over a barrel. Do you make it public knowledge and lose her friendship. There is also the possibility that she will accuse you of lying. It will be a hard cross to bear, but you have to seriously consider if you have a future with this girl. She seems pretty devious to me, and I apologise if I am wrong. Good Luck.
2007-01-21 04:39:00 · answer #1 · answered by breedgemh_101 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You need to have a serious chat with her an abortion is not as simple as it sounds,talk to her and show her what options she has,if she keeps the baby then yeah it is hard work being a mother but its also very rewarding when you first see them when they first say i love you or mummy,an abortion will stay with you for the rest of your life and you'll always wonder what if,wonder what they'l look like etc and she might even regret it after the baby is gone or might be complications and she wont be able to have any more kids like my aunty.but if she does she'l be able to carry on her life and acheive her ambitions and have kids when she is ready.Tell her just because she is pregnant doesnt mean her life has to stop i got all my qualifacations after i had my little girl,talk to her give her the options tell her how you feel then let her decide.good luck.xx
2007-01-21 19:02:07 · answer #2 · answered by deliciousde 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, I do feel a bit sorry for guys in the whole abortion/preganacy thing. You could have a one night stand and end up fathering a child that you don't want, with a woman you depise, or you could want a child, and your other half doesn't, in which case you are just as helpless.
So.....what does this teach us? Well, the rare accidents that result in prgnancy aside, it takes two to be lax about contraception to get someone pregnant, so she is just as much to blame as you, but in future, spare yourself this situation by always using a condom. Best way, trust me, I have five older brothers, and a few of them have had girlfriends have abortions, and one of them has a baby with the biggest bike in our county, which would be ok, but she doesn't even look after him proparly, if it weren't for me, that kid wouldn't even have any clothes. Took that for my brothers to wise up, let this be your one and only mistake.
i'm sorry you are having a hard time throguh it though, but if she thinks it's for the best, she is most likely right you know.
2007-01-21 04:39:52 · answer #3 · answered by CHARISMA 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Your "girlfriend" obviously does not have the same morals that you do and that is sad.the abortion issue is a VERY,VERY touchy subject and you are going to get a HUGE amount of feedback on this,the only thing that you need to do is make the deccision weather or not it is O.K. with YOU,the decision she made,if not I would find someone to date,and now you will know what to look for,someone with a good set of morals,who would at least let you have a say in a situation like this.I wish you the best of luck with the whole thing,but do not ever forget the way she handled this situation,because that is a pretty good indication of how she would handle other problems in her life!The best of luck to you!
2007-01-21 04:42:49 · answer #4 · answered by zinubes 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your girlfriend seemed to trust you enough to tell you!! I would think if you are truly a FRIEND you would keep the secret even if you don't agree with her decision. The best thing you can do is be supportive and keep an eye on her. Deciding on abortion is a very hard thing, and, from what I've heard, actually going through with it can lead to depression...so make your decision carefully.
2007-01-21 04:42:44 · answer #5 · answered by Kottonfire7 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Having an abortion is not an easy choice to make but if she is set on having one all i would advice is that you try to be as supportive as possible . Try to imagine what your girlfriend must be feeling and how hurt and upset she must be. yes i understand that you must be feeling the same but it's in her body not yours. Some people say abortion is murder but i believe you have to make the right choice for all concerned . Why have a child who you can't support and love . They is too many unwanted children already in the world . Best of luck to you and your girlfriend
2007-01-21 04:40:35 · answer #6 · answered by scorpionbabe32 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
First, use protection next time!!! Second...I hope that you can find a way to go and be there with her when she has it done. Sounds like life happened to you guys a bit too quick...but it took 2 of you to get into the situation and you really should be there for her regardless of what she decides to do to help her through a tough time - both emotionally and physically.
2007-01-21 05:17:03 · answer #7 · answered by chick33 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i have to say I'm against it,
but well I'd say you both need to discus it properly would you both be able to look after it? how will you both feel afterwards ? can she live with herself afterwards ? would it be so bad if she had the child ? what do you think about it ? would you support her /be able to cope with a child? couldn't she take a year out of her studies to have the child ?
these are the sort of questions you need to be asking yourself and her.
as for the future - i believe you should both be using something -unless your trying for a baby use a condom or keep it in the trousers.
and you need to say your not going to keep your mouth shut she'll need support to get over it if she decides to go ahead at least tell one of her closest Friends, i know she wont thank you but i reckon she would be better off to be able to talk it through with someone else besides you.
it's a difficult position to be in but i have to say you did bring it on yourself and you have certain responsibilities to her.
2007-01-21 04:54:25 · answer #8 · answered by doughnut1002001 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
until the babies born and your on the birth certificate the law doesnt recognise you as a parent, the law works more for women where children are concernd. unless you can change her mind theres not a lot you can really do. tell her how you feel and also ask her why she wants to abort the baby, maybe you can find a comprimise, she may just be scared.
best of luck xx
2007-01-21 04:39:06 · answer #9 · answered by thebluehaze 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Keep your mouth shut. If she wants an abortion, that's her body and if she wants to keep it a secret, then let her. If I were her, I'd do the same. You both are young and do not need a child to wreck your lives.
2007-01-21 05:13:51 · answer #10 · answered by Sarah* 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋