Help, my live-in boyfriend & I are having our first baby ( I'm 42, he's 41) At first he seemed excited, now all I get is smart *** comments about "If you're really pregnant", or "Don't read any articles or books til we know for sure"....I've taken 3 home tests - I'm sure!! He doesn't even want to talk about it & no longer wants to go to my first OB visit. How can I handle his sudden change of attitude?
2007-01-20 22:48:30 · 7 answers · asked by sandypaws 6 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
He's probably REALLY scared, and that is why he is reacting that way. Does he have other children, or is this a first for the both of you?
Give him time....it is as shocking for him as it is for you probably.
Good Luck!!
(enjoy your pregnancy and baby!!)
2007-01-20 23:33:21 · answer #1 · answered by ♦♦pixiechix♦♦ 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think that it is just a thing of cold feet, and I also think that he is right to be worried. Just because you have a positive pregnancy test doesn't mean that you will be going home with a baby in 8-9 months. I just had a miscarriage about 6 months ago, and my husband had tried to tell me not to get my hopes up about the pregnancy. But us females seem to be hard wired to have everything up until them going to college planned already when we see those lines.
Just give it time, he'll probablt take until the 3 month mark to settle into the idea as that is the supposed safe mark. Also they don't have the whole thing of it growing inside them. Do your thing plan everything and then when he gets used to it get him involved. Congrats and good luck.
2007-01-20 23:21:16 · answer #2 · answered by Rhubarb 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Maybe he's realizing he'll be almost 60 by the time the child graduates high school. Something like that must have hit him for it to have changed his mood about it. He probably thought he was making it through life without planning around a kid. I'd wait it out and see how things are after the first OB visit. Show him the sonogram or something else to prove there IS a baby and maybe he'll realize it is going to happen.
Those are just my thoughts on it.
2007-01-20 22:59:03 · answer #3 · answered by Tiffany 3 · 2⤊ 1⤋
He's probably just freaked at the sudden idea of a big change to his life. My boyfriend acted in a similar way not long after we set a date for our wedding.
Try to talk to him, but not directly about the pregnancy. Tell him that you've noticed a change in his attitude recently and ask if there's anything that's bothering him and if there's anything you can do to help. Just let him know you are there to talk and try not to alienate him by going on about the baby or things relating to it. He may just need the time to adjust.
In my circumstance, my bf said that he was scared I was turning into bridezilla and it was one of the reasons he began cold and strange when I mentioned the wedding. He just needed time and I needed to not talk about it 24/7.
I hope you get this resolved.
2007-01-20 22:59:01 · answer #4 · answered by Perversia 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
poor u, u must be worried enough without his lack of support. It sounds like he is a bit scared to me, i think he needs a bit of a kick up the backside from u!!!! he is old enough not to act so immature and be a bit more supportive. Good luck, i hope he comes round. an good luck with the baby.
have u shown him the 3 tests?? impossible to be wrong.. show him the literature on that he will have to believe u
2007-01-20 22:56:24 · answer #5 · answered by Serry's mum 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
It's possible that he isn't in love with the idea of being a father at his age.
My guess is that, once it becomes obvious that you're pregnant, he'll begin to find fault with you until he has convinced himself that it's alright to leave the relationship.
I could be wrong, but I'd be willing to bet big bucks that I'm not.
2007-01-20 22:59:30 · answer #6 · answered by silvercomet 6 · 1⤊ 2⤋
he doesnt want to dreamHe knows its risky He doesnt want to plan what It might not become real.
2007-01-20 22:55:56 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 3⤋