what would u think?!?

Question

My husband and I were sitting in bed talking and I asked him how he knew he was in love wit me.. and he couldn't give me an answer, he said he jus knew? How would u feel about this???? I mean, I can give him a million and one answers on how I kno I'm in love wit him. He doesn't ever tell me his feelings and I've tried explaining 2 him that I want him 2 open up 2 me about how he's feeling and he saids he understand and will open up at that point but then we got thru the same cycle. We have a lil one so its hard 2 find time 2 spend 2gether so when we do he is always tired cuz he works long hrs. And so am I but I try 2 make time 4 him. I'm jus wanting opinions on this matter, is it a guy thing or what?

Answer 1

he's a typical man, they don't speak their feelings like us chicks....i'd let it go if i were you, but then again ....i'm not you. good luck wit that

Answer 2

Calm down honey. Most men don't operate the way we do, and while opening up about our feelings makes us feel closer to them, they think of it as something totally different. It's scary and uncomfortable to them. For the same reason alot of men are uncomfortable with crying in front of anyone, you are beating a dead horse trying to make him have a vulnerable, touching little psychoanalysis of himself.
It doesn't mean that he doesn't love you. He probably thinks it is strange that you are freaking out about this subject NOW. After you are married and have brought a child into the world. Alot of men think that if they show up, that's enough to show you they care.

That being said, you have every right to want an emotional connection. You are just going about it in the wrong way. Making him feel like he has to, or letting it cause a strain in your relationship if he doesn't, won't change his mindset. If anything, the poor guy will just tell you what he thinks you want to hear to avoid confrontation. And that doesn't accomplish anything in the long run.
You're gonna have to be calm about it and not pressure him. Create the situations that will ease him into a comfort zone when it comes to expressing emotion. Don't expect him to be a different animal overnight, or make him feel like he is disappointing you. Put yourself out there. Tell him the type of things you want to hear yourself, without the expectation or demand that he reciprocate. Make it a natural, regular occurance until he gets used to that, and dealing with that kind of situation and conversation will become normal, and in time he won't be scared uncomfortable, or intimidated by it.
Anyone can change and get used to anything. Don't get discouraged. The way he behaved is actually typical of men because of the way society "programs" all of us.

Answer 3

Honey, it is a guy thing. They are hard-wired to keep their emotions close and their secrets closer. They often don't even know how they feel themselves.

Men talk in order to impart information while women talk to make a connection. You can't expect him to do things the way you do. Men and women are quite different. Try to accept that and enjoy most of the differences as usually they compliment each other. If he is loving then don't press him for why he loves you. He doesn't think in those terms.

Answer 4

This is a total guy thing.. please understand that men arent emotional thinkers like women .. and even when they are sweet or say something romantic half the time they cant come up with it on the spot its something they actually need to put some brain power into.. dont be upset.. he probably just couldnt come up with something on the spot and was drawing a blank or was afraid to say something that wouldnt be good enough or thought wouldnt be good enough so he just said "i just do" kinda answer.. be greatful that this is the worst u can complain about with ur husband.. cut him some slack..

Answer 5

Guys are visual first when it comes to being attracted to a woman. They will explore other things like attitude to doing different things, family, common interests and so on after that, and women explore those areas too. So, make yourself a list of possible relevent areas and formulate your questions in those areas and have the list ready to ask when you both get a little time to talk. Ask him different questions like " Is it this, or this or --------" and so on. That way he doesn't have to put the effort of remembering back in the beginning; lot of guys don't dwell on the first days when they got a good thing going.

It seems you have a wonderful marriage and you both work hard to make it worth it. Don't blow it on little things. Good luck.

Answer 6

it 's a guy thing for sure.I have been married for almost 22 years and my hubby is not a talker.
The thing is it used to bother me but I have realised that he shows me he loves me by doing anything I ask of him and being an all round nice guy.its a small price to pay cos I have friends who have guys who go on about how much they love them and call them 'baby' honey' and so on but they treat them like rubbish
if your man is kind and good to you be happy with that.
my hubby is also shy and I know if I put him under pressure he freaks out, but if I build his confidence he will say very sweet things from time to time and I really treasure those little moments and I think you should too

Answer 7

You need to understand that he is a man. He doesn't have the brain power to communicate all the time. It takes all his blood to work the other head. Tell him to be quiet and look cute. That is their jobs.

Answer 8

My husband and I have been together 7 yrs. and he still will not open up and let me know his true feelings.Most guys are like that.

Answer 9

I wouldn't think anything of it. I don't believe in over analyzing emotions.

Answer 10

Yes, it is a guy thing....Not talking much about emotions and stuff.........