I've been dating a girl that has MS for about a year. I'm 28, she's 21 and was diagnosed when she was 16. It has been really hard on me because the MS has caused her severe self-esteem issues, which affect the relationship when she breaks down after hearing even the slightest bit of criticism from others, regardless of how unwarranted it may be.
I'm having a hard time adjusting to the university (Berkeley) and her being very dependent on my support is wearing me out. I've been very supportive of her and have helped her achieve many things but the minute I show any disagreement with the way she handles things, I am accused of not being supportive at all.
I love her and don't want to break up with her but she is failing to take care of herself, ranging from not taking her Copaxone shots to going as far as cutting herself this weekend.
I live an hour away and am busy with school and can't be there with her so I'd like for her to take care of herself. Therapy's not working.
HELP!
2007-01-20 18:03:13 · 2 answers · asked by rebel_dj 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
I also have MS and I also had the same emotional problems that you have described, I was always in tears over the smallest of things.
I spoke with my MS nurse about it and I'm now on anti depressants which have helped me no end, I finally feel like I'm getting my life back.
I am also on Copaxone shots and they do work together.
See if you can encourage her to speak to her Dr about what is going on. Its hard, I know I didn't like people saying things about me being poorly and needing help and I even ignored the advice from my nurse for a few weeks until I realised I was losing complete control.
Good luck and if you want to ask me any questions mail me.
2007-01-20 21:45:52 · answer #1 · answered by Tara 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get her parents involved. They need to know that she is cutting herself and has depression issues. Don't make her problems into your problems. You can't fix them EVEN IF you love her, EVEN IF you're there for her, EVEN IF she's mature, EVEN IF the moon is made of cheese. She's decided to be a "victim" instead of a "survivor". There's nothing you can do to change that- she'll have to do it on her own. Until she can be strong enough within herseld she isn't healthy enough to have a relationship with you. She's depending on you like a friend, a very bad one, not as a lover and companion.
I think it would show alot of class and charachter on your part to contact her parents. A few years down the line she will be grateful for what you've done for her.
2007-01-20 18:29:12 · answer #2 · answered by Honesty given here! 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋