Would you file for Child Support???

Question

my exhusband and I have been seperated for 20 months and divorced for 7. the courts decided 17 months ago on how much child support he should pay. he has not paid one dime. i do not see him, he lives out of town now. WOULD you trade not getting child support, to not have to deal with your ex?? he has no money so i know it would be a hassle to get money out of him, even through an agency. he does not try to see her right now, i have sole custody and no visitation. IM THINKING ABOUT GOING THROUGH AN AGENCY TO GET MY CHILD SUPPORT, BUT ON THE OTHER HAND I DO NOT WANT TO STIR UP ANYTHING. I AM HAPPY WITH HIM NOT BOTHERING US AND STAYING AWAY.

WOULD YOU TRADE IT, TO BE LEFT ALONE??????
i know everyone is going to say, i need to get it for my child, i am struggling yes, but is the money worth it to be miserable????

He has a prison record, he has admitted to me to doing coke, and his girlfriend is a coke dealer. he claims they are clean now. im scared he may try to get some kind of custody, i have seen courts award worse verdicts, should i just leave it all alone????????????

ANYONE THAT HAD TO DEAL WITH THIS PLEASE LET ME KNOW,

THANK YOU

IS IT WORTH WORRYING ABOUT WHERE MY 22 MONTH OLD DAUGHTER IS GOING, AND WHERE IS SHE SLEEPING? IS SHE BEING LEFT ALONE IN THE TUB? HE DID NOT EVEN KNOW HOW TO BATHE HER, OR EVEN WHERE HER DIAPERS WERE WHEN WE WERE TOGETHER.

I HAVE SOLE PHYSICAL/LEGAL CUSTODY, HE IS STILL ON PAROLE, SO I KNOW THAT NOT PAYING CHILD SUPPORT IS A VIOLATION OF HIS PAROLE, HE WILL GO STRAIGHT TO JAIL, IM NOT SURE I REALLY WANNA SEND HIM BACK FOR A FEW MORE YEARS, I APPRECIATE THE ANSWERS GUYS.

Answer 1

He has money to do coke, but none to be responsible for a child? You wonder why he has no money, its all going up his nose Yes the best that I could tell you is try though some non profit agency to collect on the back support and don't hire anyone because it might be a long time before you actually see any.. Just be the best parent you can be for you child. she needs one decent parent Good luck!

Answer 2

Dear Mary,

You have an ugly situation on your hands, but you do have remedies as well. If your ex has been clean for less than a year, and he takes you to court for visitation, you can ask the court to have him tested for drugs. He has also been in prison, which will weigh very much against him having custody or visitation. If he is still with the coke dealer, you can request of the court that she not be allowed to be around your daughter. She is not entitled to have any visitation at all, even if he marries her. Also, if you lose the battle to keep them from visiting, you can ask for supervised visitation - during which he cannot leave a designated visitation spot with your daughter.

Now, as to child support: you need it, or you would not be considering this at all. Go after it. You and your daughter deserve SOMETHING from the loser. You can ask the court to not tell him where you are, as well. If he bothers you, get a restraining order. He has no visitation, so you don't have to put up with any harassment at all. If his present partner is dealing drugs, they have plenty of money. Make him pay. He has had a pretty worthless life so far, help him make it count for something. Just get a good lawyer and make certain that you are not vulnerable. He might threaten to sue for custody or visitation, but no court will approve it if you have a good attorney. Drug tests can be run on hair and can go back years with a hair sample to prove that he is using. If he shaves his head, there is other hair. Also, I doubt his drug-dealing gf will shave HER head. Make her get tested to prove she is unfit for your child to be around. There are ways and ways and ways to keep rats away from the innocent.

Good luck.

Answer 3

If you don't want anything to do with this person, you may wish to let the matter rest.

However, you are entitled to child support and you can get your local DCSS (dept. of child support services) on him and they will attach his wages/taxes or go after his driver's license and even put him in jail and pay the back-child support with any bond he posts.

If he is a nasty dude though, you may not want to disturb a nest of snakes... tough call-- GOOD LUCK!

If you're worried he may come out of the woodwork and seek some type of custody, you need to talk to an attorney and make sure you get sole legal/physical custody!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Get a court order NOW and it will be harder for him to modify it as he will have the burden to prove he has changed and is clean/sober.

Talk about the possibility of terminating his parental rights for relinquishment for all possible child support in the future....scum bags often go for this type of thing.

Your baby is the ONLY thing you should be worried about and you must protect him/her.

I really think you should see if he'll terminate his rights. That would offer the most security for you and your kid.

Answer 4

Been there done that, only the child is not bioligically mine. I am raising her, and to me, she really is mine. Her father did drugs, sold/did, and was a jerk. He wouldn't work and did everything to get out of paying support. He threatened my child's mother and tried to threaten me. Didn't work on me. I hired a child support collection agency out of Texas. Don't do it! They end up getting more of the money than you do, and chances are, the state you are living in will get the money and the agency will take most of it, claiming they collected it. Go to the courts, tell them what you can prove, get a PI to do a records check on him and his girlfriend. If you have sole custody and no visitation, you have less to worry about, believe me. He may not work, but sooner or later he has to do something. His license could be taken, his possession repo'd, whatever. You shouldn't have to struggle like you do. Call his bluff and file!

Answer 5

You said you had sole custody and no visitation from him, so why worry about what he will do with her. If you turn him in, as you should, he won't be around her, he'll be in jail. Under no circumstances should any man be let off paying for his kids. You may come to need that money real bad someday to buy your child something important and if you let it go now, you may not have any recourse to get it then. He should pay. Think of your child, not the inconvenience of him in your life.

Answer 6

Piece-of-crap exes don't just stay away; they pop up and make things difficult when you least expect it.

By making no effort to see his daughter or meet his financial obligation, he is only thinking of himself. Child support is a serious legal obligation. He's blowing it off. Maybe that suggests he'll blow off other legal conditions in the future. Like, maybe he'll one day decide that the "no visititation" rule doesn't apply to him. You should pursue the child support to make it clear that he can't just walk on you. If he has no money, you might still not get the child support, but at least his "dead beat dad" status will be on the court record.

Answer 7

It should've been included in your divorce decree. If it was, and he's not paying, he's in contempt of court. You shouldnt need to deal with him directly. It goes thru the court. Dont look at it that way. It would be an advantage to both you and your child. It's not a gift. It's a obligation he must live up to. Actually the IRS may also become involved. Especially if he has a refund due.

Answer 8

You know that sounds just like my situation but we were never married and I decided to go through child support people and now I would just rather him give up whatever rights he does have and leave us alone. Its not always good for a child to get money that comes from your ex who you know does drugs.I would rather my child accept a real man to be her father then the one who is suppose to be her father. They never change once they have a drug problem like that cause they don't want any responsibility.Plus it is way too much trouble you'd be better off not getting anything and raising her yourself or with someone who loves you and her.

Answer 9

you could. nicely, maximum places you could. i don't understand the place you would be submitting and for this reason can not say for particular, yet maximum of North usa does not discriminate that promptly. On paper, men are the two deserving of help. of direction, maximum places use an earnings-based formulation to make certain help duties, and purely some certainly evaluate the quantity of time the secondary discern spends with the youngster in that calculation, so in maximum places except you are the custodial discern, you would be paying. seems that girls win custody something like ninety% of the time, so men are those that finally end up paying help lots of the time. So it is not a case of fellows can not get help, that's a case of fellows are much less often the custodial discern and infrequently have lots smaller earning than the lady interior the case, one or the two one in each and every of which could be actual for a guy to obtain help.

Answer 10

YOU have no right to NOT go after child support. Child support has NOTHING to do with YOU, it is for the financial support of your CHILD. You have a responsibility to make sure this child is supported properly and an obligation to go after what is rightfully HER's. Just becuase YOU don't want to be bothered is NOT an excuse. What kind of a mother are you "I don't want to be bothered so I'm not going to make sure my child gets what the child is entitled to". Get over yourself and stop being self centered this isn't about YOU it is about your child...You're no better a parent than your ex is.