One of your friends comes out to you with "I'm gay." Does that change your opinion of them as a person? Do you think being gay is bad or good or do you not care? Why?
Please do not curse or swear at or about people if you think being gay is bad or brings down the value of a person.
2007-01-20 15:05:36 · 35 answers · asked by matt 3 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
No, I am not gay. And I don't plan to be.
2007-01-20 15:12:40 · update #1
Why is it so important to know, whether some one is gay ?
It would not change my friendship with that person. It would
actually strengthen it, knowing that there are a lot of people
out there who have a different view.
2007-01-20 15:22:26 · answer #1 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
People don't "choose" to become gay. Gays are often unaccepted and mocked in our society...why would someone choose to be ridiculed and not be given the same rights? That's why so many gays have a hard time coming out of the closet.
Homosexually has been studied. They've studied twins while they were kids and saw that one might seem homosexual (such as the guy likes Barbies over GI Joes). When they got older, that child was gay. If it were nurture and not nature, they would both be the same.
And I've even seen gays born in families where there were other gays, which to me shows the genetic influence.
Everyone deserves to be treated with respect, unless they're given a reason not to, and being born with a different sexual orientation as the general public believes, is not reason to treat someone different.
2007-01-20 15:18:34 · answer #2 · answered by * Terri * 2 · 3⤊ 1⤋
Well, I'm gay, or bi, or something, but anyway, I didn't used to be...or, rather, I didn't know that I was, and since I'm fairly religious, I still try to 'not' "be gay". Anyway, so a friend comes out to you, it really depends on you now, doesn't it, and him as well. After all, since I'm outlandishly religious seeming to my friends, I think a few of them might feel betrayed, as though I had been living a double life...kinda a, "If he lied about that, what else don't we know about him."
That's all beside the point though, because really, unless his coming out does cause him to change the way he acts (and sometimes it does; a guy comes out and suddenly is acting like a fairy, it happens) then there's really no reason that you should treat him less as a friend. You're own moral values will decide for you how you feel and how you react to any perceived "sin", but remember that regardless, he is still a person, he still needs love (not lovin' necessarily, but love) and since he came out to you, it probably means he trusts you.
A person can't help if they're gay, and there's a lot of societal pressure nowadays to be true to your sexual identity. Judge him by his actions toward you, his other friends, and family, and try not to put more emphasis on his sexual identity than is reasonable. A slutty heterosexual is just as morally corrupt as a slutty homosexual, and a chaste homosexual is just as morally righteous as a chaste heterosexual (perhaps moreso since avenues toward marriage are not always available).
Hope that helps.
2007-01-20 15:15:37 · answer #3 · answered by Jacob P 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
A person doesn't choose to be gay. I've met children who were 8 and 9 years old and I could tell they were gay. You can't tell me they chose to be that way because a small child doesn't think about sexual orientation at that age. But I could tell from the way they talked, from the way they walked and just being around them, I knew. They didn't admit it until they were grown but I wasn't surprised and I didn't change my opinion of them. I think if these people had a choice, they wouldn't choose to be gay. But they have no choice. It's who they are.
2007-01-20 15:20:46 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
No, it won't change how I think about the person. I don't care if someone is gay or straight.
Why? First, I will tell you I do not understand homo-sexuality and why someone becomes one or wants to become one. But my understanding is not a requirement for them to exist, like, or dislike. Heck, if that was a requirement, 99% of things in this world shouldn't exist...
My criteria for liking or dis-liking is the impact of such things (anything) would have on me in person. Tell you what.... they have NEVER had any impact on me what-so-ever! I work with many people who are gay. Their sexuality never had any impact on what I need out of them, or what they need out of me. It simply has no impact.
I just can not understand why some people care so much about a character of someone else when it has no effect on them what-so-ever.
2007-01-20 15:19:11 · answer #5 · answered by tkquestion 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I believe a person's sexual preference is their own business. Were a friend to tell me he/she is gay I would treat them the same as I always have - my feelings would not change. As I have had this experience - I know what I say is true - I'm not just saying what I think is politically correct.
2007-01-20 15:21:23 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
absolutely not. A gay person is no different than a straight one is. Their likes and dislikes are different, but that doesn;t make a gay person bad. At work, a no ask, no tell is the best. Keep their gay lives separted from work lives.
What a person does after work, is no bodies business but their own. Being happy with your lives is what it is all about.
2007-01-20 15:16:41 · answer #7 · answered by cprucka 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
There is nothing wrong with being gay. If a friend of mine came up to me and said, "I'm gay" it would not matter. They are still the same person you that have come to know and love before you found this information out. Just that you now know something else about should not changeyour opinion, if it does, then you weren't a real friend.
2007-01-20 15:09:20 · answer #8 · answered by Scotjay 2 · 10⤊ 1⤋
Most gay people are not gay by choice. For example, they happened to develop female brains rather than male brains. In case you didn't know it, there are big differences. So a guy can feel as though he is female, and be attracted to guys. And it's not a choice, it's just who he is. It's not a matter of good or bad. It's just the luck of the draw, who the person turned out to be.
2007-01-20 15:18:13 · answer #9 · answered by ? 7 · 2⤊ 1⤋
If your friend comes out and tells you there gay or bi, well good for them! That means that they trust you enough and think that you'll understand.
I think its awsome that someone is willing to put themselves on the line and tell you a big secret about them. That takes alot of courage and it's not something that should be taken lightly. If you leave them because of that then you've really hurt them deeply and it could take them a long time to feel okay about themselves again.
One of my BEST friends told me she was bi and it really doesn't make a difference to me at all. Now I just know more about her and it made us even better friends.
2007-01-20 15:21:00 · answer #10 · answered by ? 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋