controlling husband?

Question

why do husband yell when you are talking to them about something you dont like it that a form of controll when they yelling to put fear in you and they not working the wife paying all the bills and buying all the food help me on this one ty.

Answer 1

My husband does that, I think it's because he's afraid of what I MIGHT say so he tries to talk over me so he can't hear it.

Answer 2

Your husband have a control problem along with other issues. Just be careful that this free loading control freak don't start to hit you. Without sex ( and you can get that anywhere ) what do you need him for? You can do good and bad by yourself. I had one of these husbands. I'm out working and he'd stay home and clean the house, run the streets, knock on every female door around the neighborhood and then would have the nerve to lay on MY king size bed, in MY air condition house, eating MY food that I purchased and yell and scream like a little girl. The only thing he turned violent and I had to show him my momma didn't raise a wimp. It's issues he have with himself and you can't help him, only he can do that. He don't want to hear that you have an opinion about anything. He's trying to intimidate you into not saying anything about his wrong doings. If you are afraid to make him leave. Move yourself out of the house. Talk to your family, Tell someone what your are going Thur. I'll be willing to bet if this have not turn into beatings it is well on it's way.

Answer 3

Your husband is a loser! Most men feel that it is their job to provide for his family. Not that I agree with that 100%, I do agree that it should be both people working.
Your advantage to this situation is that you can leave him. You already have a job and since you pay all the bills and buy all the food, just think how much more money you would have with out him sitting around all day burning up electricity and eating all the food. I say move out and leave him to fend for himself. Since he tries to scare you he is a control freak and is mentally abusive. You could go to a battered women's shelter for a few weeks while you save up your pay checks to get your own place. In under a month you could be living in your own place. Happy thoughts! Don't worry about the cost of a divorce. There are lawyers who will charge by the amount of money you make called sliding scale lawyers. I've been in an abusive relationship too. I wish you the best.

Answer 4

Ya know Joanna, you've really been beating a dead horse with this whole controlling husband thing. You keep asking basically the same question about your horrible husband. You've been given some wonderful, caring, insiteful advise on what to do as far as your husband and marriage are concerned.
Don't just keep re-wording the same thing over and over. You know what you should do. People have given you their opinions/advise. It's time you either acted on some of that advise or learn to live with your situation.

Answer 5

So many live with someone that is not worth living with. It can be either male of female that just seem to take it. Most will say but I love her or him. Face the truth it is not love at all. lust it may be but most likely it's more habit than anything else.

First take a very good look at what really is then do what has to be done to sollve the problem.

A good partner is very difficult jto find. They are there so don't give up.

Answer 6

you should not allow him to yell at you. when he does that just turn and walk away from him. don't say anything at all. when he finally realizes that this is what you will do everytime, he will stop.
i do not think he is a controlling husband by doing this though. obnoxious maybe but not controlling.
controlling is telling you what you can do-- where you can do it --where you can go and with whom. what to eat--when to eat it--what to say to people and when to say it--holding all the money and you have to ask for it when you need something---cursing--slapping---punching--shooting at you --and threatening to take your children and leave if you don't do as you are told.
that is a controlling husband. (that was what my mom put up with for 32 years.)

Answer 7

He is controlling you he feels little because he is not the man of the house and making the major amount of the bread so instead of dealing with it he tries to make you feel bad My X did this all the time. I would say now Honey when she starts yelling say it soft and nice why don't you at least go out and get a temp job until you can find one you want you'll feel better I bet.

Answer 8

If he never works, you do all the financial support and he yells at you, why are you still there? Sounds to me as if you need to lose a 200 pound weight around your neck. Been there and done it. Take back the power and control your own destiny. Either he stops yelling, gets a job and starts conttributing, or you are outta there. If you don't do that, it isn't his fault, it is yours for allowing him to treat you this way.

Answer 9

no i wouldn't call that controlling he's probably just more verbal some cultures are that way. just let him know you can talk to him without him yelling .. same with women some yell all the time and gives the poor guy a headache.

Controlling you'll know it your whole life isn't yours and any thoughts you may have won't count.

Answer 10

they yell because it intimidates you into submission which is exactly where this guy wants you. So yes you are right about the "fear" thing. As for the paying of the bills and buying all the food. You gave me a visual of a big fat pig that is abusive. I would be telling him to get off his lazy *** and get a job. If it scares you too much to say that because he may hit you, then you really should find a safe way to leave him. Leave no forwarding address.

Answer 11

He sounds like he is on the defensive side of the argument and he doesn't know how to handle it. Try to find a more positive spin so he can't get defensive. There's always another side to look at when discussing what you don't like. Maybe you should talk about what you would like.