I know a woman who hates having sex with her husband. She says it's a chore, just another job to do at the end of a long day. They only have 1 child and the woman is the breadwinner. The husband stays at home with the baby.
She claims that "he gets plenty". This is not just a new stage in their marriage or a natural dry spell. This is their normal sex life. He only gets it when she says so. She is a self-proclaimed Christian feminist. Now she suspects that he is cheating and she wants my sympathy. I don't think I feel sorry for her.
What do you think?
2007-01-20 11:38:32 · 16 answers · asked by blazenphoenix 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
How can she be a self proclaimed Christian feminist? Is that something she just made up? If she's a Christian then she should know that it says in the Bible that wives should submit to their husbands...that's in all areas of a marriage.
Little does she know that she's using sex as a weapon against her husband and that's not right. Granted her husband shouldn't go out & cheat because he is committing adultery.
I don't feel sorry for her one bit..she has brought this on herself and shes basically the only one who can fix it.
2007-01-20 11:55:55 · answer #1 · answered by Gator Fan 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well, maybe she doesnt deserve sympathy, but i dont think that there is ANY good reason for cheating. If there is a problem with the marriage then they need to work it out. Maybe they have tried and he gets nowhere and the only way he thinks she will agree to a divorce is to cheat, since that is what the bible says. It is hard for me to understand what in the worl a "christian feminist" is, since the bible says that a wife should obey her husband and says nothing about feminism! I am a stay at home mom and i know how hard it is to not have any adult interaction all day long and to have to care for a baby by yourself. We all have needs and its certainly not fair that she withholds sex from him, but also doesnt mean that its okay for him to cheat. Tell her the truth! Tell her maybe she should rethink the way shes gone about being a wife.
2007-01-20 11:54:10 · answer #2 · answered by Aubrey 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The wife should not be withholding sex. Ideally, men want an enthusiastic, open and playful partner. Or at least a willing one. He is in a very tough spot, and he needs to err on the side of his child. He should not just up and leave as others have suggested, because the child needs and deserves a father who is involved every day. His affair is understandable, human beings need the emotional attachment he seeks like they need water and food. It sounds like the wife is a little manipulative, and hopefully he can stand in there and be strong for his child's sake.
2007-01-20 13:55:44 · answer #3 · answered by Paul 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I agree with you about women refusing to have sex and then being shocked and hurt when their husbands get it elsewhere. Also agree that it's better for the man to have sex than to have a love affair. In Spitzer's case, however, he has built a career out of prosecuting those who did just that. What's good for the goose is good for the gander....either throw his @ss in jail or let the johns he locked up go free.
2016-03-29 06:44:54 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I believe that it is fair for him to remain faithful. I personally love making love to my husband although we haven't in almost three months. We have to wait one more week(just had a baby), but he knows that on the occasion when his urges are met, he will be well taken care of. Men are also responsible for the lack of sex that takes place in a marriage. Women do not always want to hop in bed, do it and then go to sleep. Maybe if he took the time to make the experience enjoyable for both parties, he would get more.
2007-01-20 12:17:17 · answer #5 · answered by distinct_lady 1 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I don't feel sorry for her either. Men and women see sex differently. Women need to feel loved in order to do it, and men need to do it in order to feel loved. When a woman sexually abandons her husband, it leaves him feeling very rejected and he begins to suffer from low self esteem. Another woman comes along that makes him feel good about himself again, and the affair starts.
Play her a violin.
2007-01-20 11:48:48 · answer #6 · answered by Miami Lilly 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If she makes him feel that being intimate with him is a "chore", then I think he would be within his rights to seek intimacy elsewhere. This would apply if the genders were reversed. I wouldn't feel sorry for her either; it sounds like she should be relieved.
2007-01-20 11:47:20 · answer #7 · answered by Brian W 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
personally I think that withholding sex is the biggest reason people cheat. I'd have no sympathy for her.
2007-01-20 11:45:48 · answer #8 · answered by Pandora 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think he should go get it somewhere else don't feel sorry foe her she wasn't taking care of her business! Thats what happens when women don't want to do it to their husbands~!
2007-01-20 11:48:59 · answer #9 · answered by kd 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
okay i have two opinions to this situation. first he should never cheat regardless. if he's not happy, get out. he has other options. secondly, no she should not withold sex. if she doesn't like sex with her husband. she should tell him and they should seek counseling to find out what the issue is. there is probably something deeper than what she is leading on
2007-01-20 11:47:47 · answer #10 · answered by Lori B 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋