When my son was in 2nd grade, he went to a Christian school, and every morning, they would have prayer requests. I had a stomach virus, and my son went to school and said, in front of the whole school, "Could you please pray for my Mom? She is pooping and pooping and pooping and can't stop and Daddy said he was going to make her start wearing diapers!"
Oh....my....god..... :P
2007-01-20 08:18:35 · 36 answers · asked by spun_up_06 4 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Polls & Surveys
we were at wal-mart and there was this indian lady standing in line behind us. she had one of those dots on her forehead. well my daughter - shes 2 - kept looking at it and pointing at it saying "owie!" she wanted to kiss it and make it better. lol.
2007-01-20 08:21:55 · answer #1 · answered by Your Angel 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
A couple came to my mind real quick.
This one was true as it happened to me. My son was about 4 at the time and a real chatterbox, we were at the grocery store and he was in the cart handing the lady the groceries to check out, he was just a chattering away at her, then all of a sudden, he starts going....hey,,,,hey....hey guess what, I am thinking oh crap what is he gonna say, the lady stopped checking the groceries....looked right into his litte face and said what honey...with all the voice he could muster he shouts...'ME AND MY DADDY ARE CIRCUMSIZED!!!!!!!!!"
the whole place was dead silent, and the checker said well sweetie thats good, next item!
The other is a story I heard or someone told me I cant remember, but it was cute.
A little girl that did not get to go to church alot was invited to Easter Sunday services by her aunt and uncle, all the kids got to stand up front and receive their Easter baskets and show off their little frilly attire. The preacher got to her, and said Janey, you sure have on a beautiful dress, all full and pretty. Little janey looked at the preacher and said yeah, and my mom said it was a ***** to iron too!
Out of the mouths of babes comes the truth.
2007-01-20 08:30:04 · answer #2 · answered by Joyce D 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't have kids, but my best friend always shares the little nuggets of humor her 4 year old daughter blurts out.
She was at the dollar store with both her kids (her son is 8), her daughter picked up some little statue thing off the shelf, kind of looked at it, and in an extremely loud voice asked "WHAT THE HELL IS THAT?" Her son wanted to crawl in a hole and die of embarassment, and she just had to try and not crack up.
Another time, the kids were fighting because her son wanted his Game Boy back from his sister. My friend told her daughter to let him have it back, so she threw it at his head and told him to "Piss off!!"
I love how kids use the words in the proper context. That's what makes it so funny.
2007-01-20 09:43:20 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
LMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!....
My son was maybe 2 1/2 at the time and I was teaching him to recognize the difference between boys and girls. We were at the library, and there is a woman that works there that is kind of frumpy looking with a really short haircut. She has been there since I was a kid. I asked the woman for help and in the middle of my sentence my son shouts (because he was just a loud kid).. "Mommy is that a boy or a girl?.. he looks like a boy, but he sounds like a girl!!!...." OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!... I was so embarrassed!!.. I tried to end the conversation with the librarian as quick as I could!!!...
2007-01-20 08:26:19 · answer #4 · answered by WhoDidThat??? 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My son has autism.
When he was 10 or so, we went out for a father and son lunch one day at a buffet. He returned to the table before I did. He was waiting for me with his hands together in prayer position.
This was noteworthy, since I'm an atheist and we don't (obviously) attend church.
I asked him why he was doing that.
"People who believe in God do this before they eat," he told me.
We discussed that it was called praying, and I asked what he knew about God and church.
He looked me right in the eye and said "Church is where the black people sit."
Yes, he said this in earshot of some black people. Oy.
I asked a few more questions and it turned out that he'd watched a cartoon where one character went to church with his black friend. It was a black church, and he basically saw a bunch of people sitting in pews. So what does he get out of it? What he just said.
It didn't offend anyone, we had a nice discussion about what people believe, life was good.
But MAN did I cringe.
2007-01-20 08:26:56 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
We were at the children's Christmas Eve service. During the silent prayer at the end of the service my 3 year old was freaking out. I ran with him like a football to the back of the church and crouched down behind the last pew at he screamed "I hate church and I hate you Mommy!" The priest was exiting the church at that exact moment and he whispered to me "You are doing a great job Chris". He held the door for me as I ran out to the car.
2007-01-20 08:24:58 · answer #6 · answered by gem 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
this is gonna take a while but i've gotta tell ya, when my daugter was approx 4 year's old i was in a fish n chip shop and there was a very large man and his stomach was on show and drooping over his trouser's at the top of her voice she kept asking why is that man so fat daddie? why is his bellie so big it was soooo embarasing for everyone there lol.
2007-01-20 08:37:36 · answer #7 · answered by Deano™ 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When my niece was 2 years old she couldn't pronounce the word sit correctly. One Sunday at church every one stood for prayer. My niece yelled at the top of her lungs.... SH_ T, I can't see!
My youngest son went to our Priest one Sunday afternoon and said his mommy needed help really bad 'cause she don't have a pot to piss in.
2007-01-20 08:25:19 · answer #8 · answered by Vida 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
my son is 4 and he picks up words very easily im gonna admit sometimes i do have a potty mouth and so do some of my friends so he started saying stupid sh*t and we wer in the store and i was in the check out line when he remembered that i had forgot to grab cat food he kept yelling cat food cat food you stupid sh*t. another story i have is when my brother inlaw was 3 some lady pinched him on the check and said aww your so cute and he jerked away and said that hurt you B>>. lol that was a story my mom inlaw told me
2007-01-20 08:27:19 · answer #9 · answered by sassy is sad 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well, i have no children but one night i was at the cheesecake factory with a couple of friends and the table next to me was a family with a toddler about 2-3 years old. the mom ordered the little boy food and when the server brought it out, the little boy threw a slit tantrum and screamed that he didnt want that and unzipped HER shirt and popped out her boobie to try to nurse, it was pretty damn vile if u ask me
2007-01-20 08:24:19 · answer #10 · answered by PYT 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
After he had watched Austin Powers the night before, I walked in to pick him up from school and he yells out "Hey Fat Ba$tard!". He hasn't seen that movie again since then. I have to admit, it was kind of funny at the time....
2007-01-20 08:22:54 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋