If you can not except somthing your partner has done and you do not feel like you can move on from it,is that the time to get out or do you just stick with it and be unhappy?
2007-01-20 06:59:47 · 23 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
when u cant stand ur spouse after severel tries and giving ups, then u sud think of getting a devorce
2007-01-20 07:03:24 · answer #1 · answered by sparrow 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, it depends on a few things dear...I am not against divorce my any means. Sometimes that is the best answer. Although I do believe that now a days, it's almost become the norm to just end things when times get rough. So keep in mind that things can be fixable. Sometimes after working through a problem, your relationship becomes much stronger. Please ask yourself if you both have put your 100% into being there for each other's needs? Cause if not, counseling may be an option. Or has your spouse betrayed you more then once, and you feel your trust would be imposible to ever get back? Take a good long look at where you are at? Have you both tried time and time again, although things just don't feel right? If this is the case, it's probably the right choice to move on, giving both a new start on life. Although, if you feel you both haven't put your all into things, and you still feel the chance to regain that love, then give it that chance to recover. Marriage is so up and down. Things can be so good, and in a moment turn bad. Although for any marriage to work, it takes a lot of trying and being there for eacthother's needs. And every one has different needs. Good luck to you...:)
2007-01-20 07:14:40 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Divorce should be the very last resort of any problem because all it is really, is a way to get out of trying to solve troubles or work through things that are not acceptable. Now there are times when things are not acceptable because it is just purely wrong and unless that person you are with repents in a pure way then divorce might be an answer.
What I am really talking about is sometimes complex troubles and things but going the route of divorce is not the best answer. Divorce is not just about the two in the problem. It also involves family if there are children present. Now if you feel it will harm the kids or know for certain then yes, divorce with the restraints that legally can be placed. But for not agreeing with how the house is run or raising the kids...divorce really ruins life for everyone involved...even to the point of other things. Kids will think they are the reason that the divorce has taken place. Outside family will try to interfere with things going on and that makes it worse even if you are just working out a problem.
I am divorced and know this is fact. But I go caught in the thought that my ex would not pull something on me so fast that it would take my breath and emotional life to the extreme away. As a matter of fact, I figured out later that he had it all planned in slow steps so I would not know what he was leading up too....now it is almost five years later. He has married twice since me and has also had several girlfriends. Our children have suffered under all those women they met and now two stepmothers. THough not all stepmoms are bad news....their feelings were not considered in any of that. But it is his life and he will answer their questions over it when they grow up as I will have too....in that almost five years time...I have concentrated on them....because to me it was the right thing to do...so think about it before you actually do divorce....is it right or can the problems be helped in some form or fashion.
2007-01-20 07:11:23 · answer #3 · answered by taljalea 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is never the right thing to just stay unhappy. Get out of it as soon as possible. The sooner you divorce, the (im not saying divorce is easy by any means, but..) easier it will be. There is another girl out tehre taht you can rely on and that can make you happy. The longer you wait to divorce, the more difficult and dramatic it will be. Trust me, get out of there now. It is not right to live unhappily. Some couples just keep staying together after numerous fights, and they live the rest of their lives together and unhappy, because it is too late for them to end it. You have the chance right now, go for it
2007-01-20 07:03:56 · answer #4 · answered by chris_m 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's a big step and you only do it when you are certain, beyond any doubt that this is the wrong person for you.
Being hurt and unhappy comes in the package, no one is perfect and people make mistakes.
you give the situation and yourself enough time to heal, if you feel it's not working you get out.
My exception is violence. Not knowing what your partner has done, if he has physically hurt you, you get out before you finish reading this.
2007-01-20 07:11:43 · answer #5 · answered by webby 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Lets say that your husband cheated on you and you can neither forgive, forget or get past. Yes, I think you need to tell him that you just can not live with that and move on. Now, if it is because you caught him drinking out of the milk jug, and you can not deal with that, then I think you would have to look at what is more important. What I am getting at, is that you need to measure the crime against your relationship and determine in your own mind against your own value system and come up with that answer on your own. Do not stay in a miserable relationship, but you just need to be sure that your misery is just or petty.
2007-01-24 02:24:11 · answer #6 · answered by Suthern R 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you have tried everything and nothing works, it is time to move on. Life is way too short to live in an unhappy situation because it will affect everything in your life and you will be unhappy and miserable, become isolated, feel insecure.
Please get out. I understand your feelings because I have been through it myself. Hard decision to make, but leaving was the best choice for me.
2007-01-20 07:04:22 · answer #7 · answered by makeitright 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is always much to consider. Are there children? can you work it out?.... Have you tried counseling ? is he cooperative ?
Try to be open about the circumstances before giving up on a marriage.
If all else fails and you are still unhappy , well do what you have to.
2007-01-20 07:03:58 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Listen to your heart and your feelings. Only you can really answer this. My ex snapped my head off again one day and crossed a line I didn't even know existed, but I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that that was it. I'd had enough.
2007-01-20 07:03:24 · answer #9 · answered by telaine 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, you should try and forgive....especially if you have children. If you absolutely know that you can not move past it, then for both of your sake's divorce now. Before you do decide to have children or ruin years of your life wasting time.
If you both can be open-minded, though, I'd urge you to try therapy.
2007-01-20 07:04:25 · answer #10 · answered by Jax 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋