Funerals. Do you wish you can choose how you are laid to rest?

Question

I am against my family spending so much money on a funeral, coffin etc. Why are funerals so expensive, and really do we have any choice not to be forced to pay the price they say, when your family is at a vunerable time in their life they will surely agree even if they can't afford it. Blackmail I say.
I think of my body as an old overcoat, when I choose to discard it, then I feel it should be dealt with as I see fit, not how others see fit.
My family would agree to whatever I want, I don't want them to be in debt over me. What do you think? Funeral directors can reply, that will be interesting reading.

You're not getting the question. I know about wills etc. I want to be cremated that goes without saying, I wouldn't want to be buried. Ugh!! My point is that we are forced by law to go through certain procedures even if we don't want to, it's like a foregone conclusion, and I would sooner my family spend the money on something else than getting rid of me!

Answer 1

I totally agree with you. (I love your old overcoat analogy). And I believe the funeral industry really gets to people financially at a time when we are very vulnerable.

Personally, I would rather remember my loved one, friend or what have you as they were in life, not in death. A lot of people feel they need to view the person in a casket to "get closure". I totally disagree with that.

The deepest fear of those who run the funeral industry is that we would all start sharing your thoughts of how we want to be laid to rest. Their profits would shrink down to nothing. Even if I could afford it, I fail to see the point of being buried in a $15,000 coffin. Think of all the people that money could help if donated to organizations that help those in need.

Great question!

Answer 2

Therein lies the wisdom of prior planning. Most of us never "get around to it" or don't want to think about it, or whatever. But I've already started "planning" and writing down what I want to happen when I go. If I ever get to the right point, I'll start executing (pardon the pun) the plan with actual cash so my family won't have to do it.

My aunt and uncle did that. They prior planned everything, right down to the funeral program and music and everything.

Cremation is always an option, and is usually less expensive because it doesn't require a coffin at the cost of a small CAR! Interment (unless you want your ashes spread somewhere) and a memorial service would the main expenses.

Answer 3

I am choosing. In fact, I want to be cremated about a dozen times, pulverized, dipped in an acid bath, and then dumped in the ocean.

Why? Because a hundred years from now I don’t want to be cloned from some stray remnant DNA as part of some high-school geek’s science experiment.

I do not intend to be resurrected as a source of entertainment for Dr. Geek and the Nerdettes.

Answer 4

If you plan ahead, you can definitely choose how you are laid to rest. One of the more economical ways to go would be cremation. No casket, unless you want one. You can be cremated in a cardboard box. Then you can choose to have your ashes scattered, buried, or put on a mantle by a family member. Happy trails!

Answer 5

You can say how you wish to be laid to rest. In your will you can state your wishes or just tell your family members what you want. You can also pre-pay for your funeral. Pay now and make all the arrangements so when the time comes your family doesn't have to do anything.

Answer 6

You can choose everything NOW for your funeral. It's called a living will. You can choose your own casket, songs that will be sung at the service, funeral home, funeral director, what cemetery you will be buried at, etc. You, too, can set aside money (I lthink it's called a trust fund) for your funeral so your family isn't stuck with the bill.

Answer 7

Maybe before you start throwing around accusations, you should consider some facts. Use you head, if funeral directors "pushed" expensive caskets on people, and then that family didn't pay their bill, how would we pay our bills? I have bills to pay too, my mortgage on my funeral home would bring most people to tears, therefore I DISCOURAGE people from a casket that they cannot afford, because when they can't pay the bill, I can't afford to get stuck on the bill. Besides, I give educated information to the families and LET THEM CHOOSE! It isn't up to me to choose a casket for their loved one, it is up to them!!!
Why do people not bat an eye at dropping $40,000 for a car, but don't want to bury their own mother? I think it is pitiful that you make judgements and accusations about something you probably know very little about, and reinforce old stereotypes. Do you have any facts or truths to back up your accusations? Or are you just spouting off about a pre-conceived notion that you have failed to research properly? Why aren't you on here spouting off about how car dealers rip us off and how lawyers overcharge and how unfair life is? Those are all stereotypes, so why don't you try bettering mankind by eradicating stereotypes instead of reinforcing them? Now there's a thought.
Bring on the thumbs down, because God forbid I don't agree with judging people.

Answer 8

Really what you need to do is determine exactly what you want done and then put it in a Will. You don't even need a lawyer for it - they have kits now you can make your own legal Will.

You go - I am with you. I detest the idea of wasting land so I can rot in my best outfit. Creamate me and distribute me in little pretty perfume bottles that any relative who wants can have - or not. Throw the ashes on the fire and be done with it. Anybody wants to talk to me after that, they have only to think about me, in my opinion.

Peace!

Answer 9

Dear Chris C,
I am with you. I have prepared a will, living will and also have added to that in a notarized form that I wish to be cremated and my ashes be put in the cardboard container that they provide (the cremation costs around $800. US dollars) and anyone in my family can just dump the ashes in the river or ocean. Simple.

Answer 10

here in israel we have no choice on how we are buried.we are not allowed to be cremated.when we die ,we get embalmed ,wrapped up like a mummy ,no coffins only for soldiers,we are put into a hole dug out to fit the body,then they lay slabs of concrete over the hole,then they put the sand to form a mold.after a month we have our head stones and covering of the grave.which is quite costly,but most beautiful.as we have been made of dust,so shall we reurn to dust,from mikhal in israel.