How can someone justify cheating on their spouse?

Question

Just curious as to how anyone can justify cheating when it's wrong.

Hey Virgo, I'm not asking for advice, just asking to see what you all think.

Personally I think cheating is wrong.

Answer 1

When it comes down to it, there is NO "justification" for cheating on your spouse. However, there tends to be reasons for the act taking place. The key is prevention. A marriage has got to be "affair proofed". A man is not going to stay faithful in a relationship where his spouse is refusing him sex and ignores his interests. A woman is not going stay faithful in a relationship where the husband denies her affection and attention as well as ignoring her interests. Statistically speaking of course.

There are needs in every marriage that must be met. Not all needs are the same in every marriage. Normally if there is a breakdown in communication between the couple there is trouble on the horizon and it won't be long in coming. They will tend to reach out to others for friendship and affection, which can have unintended results; The internet being one those areas that they can find it, e.g., chat rooms, discussion forums, etc.

I believe strong marriages start way before the wedding or ceremony of marriage. Learning about each others interests and needs is very important. Divorce is not an option in an otherwise healthy marriage where two people have simply lost the ability to communicate. It is worth saving and can be saved if the two are willing to make it work for the right reasons.

Sorry so long. Just wanted to share my opinion of this topic. Helpful or not, this is how I feel. Good question.

Answer 2

There is no justification for someone cheating on their spouse/bf/gf. cheating is wrong. If couples would communicate more and support and love each other i dont think that cheating would occur. Im sorry, I won't do it again, it was a mistake, I was drunk, those are all sorry excuses but doesnt justify it to be ok. I try to tell friends, family and people in general that if they are not happy with their other half to leave or get divorced. Cheating brings alot of problems and consequences. Cheating might feel good at that moment but then u have the consequences and the I wish i never did that, or i would take it back if i could, by then its too late. So people think before you act.

Answer 3

Irenevmnk is onto something. My first marriage ended because I had an affair, with a married man. After months of trying to mend my own marriage and not being satisifed physically, spiritually, or emotionally, I found myself to be very vulnerable and open to accecpting affections from an inappropriate man. I can't say that I justified it in my mind at the time. The pleasure of his company was so sweet, I couldn't walk away from it. I was lonely in my marriage and this man satisfied me in ways my ex-husband couldn't.

After the marriage ended I became extremely depressed and suicidal. You just don't know what you will do until you have been there. I met my new husband a year and a half later and this was the first thing I told him about myself. It turned my life inside out and I am forever changed.

Answer 4

No woman (married or single) should be forced to have sex.
No man (married or single) should be denied consentual adult sex.

So what is the solution if the wife does not want to engage in sex and the man does?

Marriage is both an emotional and contractual deal. The implied contract is that the woman will engage in sex with her spouse.

If she refuses (I'm talking about for years with no physcial reasons) then she has not fulfilled her contractual obligations.

So is the offended party (the husband) wrong for engaging in a temporary contract with another party?

Under contract law, when part of a contract is not fulfilled, the offended party may disolve the contract or may modify it. The modification can include obtaining the goods or services from another party.

Think of it in pure business terms.

If you had a concession stand and needed soft drinks and snacks. Your supplier, for whatever reason, failed to provide you with the snacks (for whatever reason), but did supply the soft drinks. Would it be "wrong" for you to obtain the snacks from someone else while still getting the soft drinks from the first vendor?

And would it be "wrong" for the second vendor knew the situation and that any time, you would go back to the first vendor whenever the snack supply returned to normal?

Answer 5

there is no justifying cheating. It is wrong....but i still believe it takes two to make and two to break, the cheating is not about something being wrong with you or her, its about something being wrong with the relationship. It usually has to do with lack of communication between the partners. I will say again there is no excuse for cheating but there are reasons why people cheat.

Answer 6

When is it wrong! Right now you asking this question makes it wrong! YOU SHOULD NEVER CHEAT!!! Break up if you feel this way and that way you won't hurt the other person as much! Even if that person cheats on you just say goodbye! Revenge is not a good thing!

Answer 7

I know people that either did it because it was done to them first and another one that know did it because they where constantly accused anyway, I personally haven't cheated so I can't say how I would justify it however I don't think I would judge someone for it either. There is another girl I know that has been divorced twice because her spouse cheated.......but if you knew her you could see why they did it!!!

Answer 8

Maybe it just goes to show you that your previous question regarding the lack of importance of sex in a marriage. Please refer to my previous answer.
It's not that they justify it, it's a basic need, and current research regarding sexual fulfilment shows how a healthy sex drive between long term partners reduces all sorts of illnesses, reduces stress, creates a closer stronger bond between a couple. If it's lacking in a relationship, the need for physical touch, satisfaction intimacy and closeness will overcome common sense and will send the unsatisfied spouse to look elsewhere. Did you know that even premature babies are known to thrive better and faster when constantly touched by a caregiver then the ones who don't ? The physical aspect of a marriage should never be neglected.

Answer 9

Nothing can justify the unfaithfulness, and the girl who accepts a relation with a married guy should accept the cheating on her one day, because he did it once and he will do it again with her. Anyway the girl who accepts a relation with a married guy is totally slut..No justification for both of them

Answer 10

Are you asking for advice, like you need a good excuse, or ---lol kidding, people definately cheat, but it's never justified, so the answer is = they can't.