Child Support?

Question

I see lots of women saying they want to get all they can, but should child support be about punishing a man or should it be about what is actually needed to support the child?

Answer 1

As they say, the first thing disregarded in a court of law is common sense. I would bet there are as many women living comfortably with the help of child support as there are deadbeat dads. I always wondered why it costs more to raise a child whose father earns $100,000 a year than ones whose father earns $40,000.

Answer 2

I agree with you to an extent on this. I think mothers often use the support for selfish needs and not what it was intended for. I think it was originally set to help children when the mother was uneducated or children to young to be left with a sitter so the mother could work. Even though a mother worked outside the home it would help with the day to day cost of raising a child. In a home where the mother has a job and is capable of providing for the children I think the judge should award support to be placed in a savings account for the further education of the children. Even in a home where the support is needed I still think the courts should monitor the money (receipts and bills where the money was used on the children) so the father's (or mother's if she is ordered to pay support) money is used for what it is intended. Our tax dollars are going to homes where the father has paid child support yet the children are still going without because the mothers are using it to support drug habits or dead beat men that don't work but live with them. As for paying the child support at all, if a man fathers a child than yes he should be just as responsible for the financial rearing of the children as he was if the home was still intact, but I do not think a man should give up the bulk of his earnings for the ex's male friends to live off of.

Answer 3

I am a mother that has been raising my children on my own for over 10 years. YES I believe in child support and that my kids' father should pay it to help me out. (after all they are his kids too and he does have rights to them). IT is not the responsibility of the government to take care of anyone's children, but the parents that had them in the first place.

I also believe that I too am responsible to financially take care of my children. Unfortunately, ineffective support can be a two-way street. There are a lot of fathers that are paying way too much and cannot even take care of themselves because of it. HOWEVER, there are many dead-beat dads (and moms of course) out there who are not taking care of the children and the coustodial parents do not always have the ability to do it all alone. Child support should go to supporting the child. HOWEVER< please consider what all this means:

People who have never raised a child alone, have absolutely no idea how expensive raising a child is: medical bills, medical insurance (mine is $235 per month for just my kids - my work covers me), Day care, school costs, Dental insurance, dental bills, clothes, and food (NOT to mention the fact that you have to have a bigger house, and heat/cool it, and cannot have roomates, etc). A good parent also has to have a vehicle to get the kids around in: (this includes, cost of vehicle, insurance, taxes, registration, etc.)

THESE don't even cover the costs of the extra things the kids really need to keep them healthy/happy children: toys, books, games, costs of sports and other activities. Most schools think that every home has a computer with internet access, so that is needed as well. ALSO, cable TV is usually not necessary, but is a nice resource. AND a working mother DEFINATELY needs to have safety measures for her stay at home children such as a working home telephone and good secure locks, etc. in the home.


I really wish people would understand all of this, and just take care of their kids.

Answer 4

Those women who want to get all they can are wrong. The men who think the child support check is for the woman are wrong. There are women and men like that (don't get me wrong) and then there are the REAL PARENTS who want to take care of their children in the meager way that way set forth by the law.

Do you know what it takes to raise a child? Food, shelter, clothing (costs more than mine most times), gas in the car to take them to all the school functions, doctors visits, co pays, meds, school lunches, school projects, school activities that keep them involved instead of on the street smoking crack or hanging out with unsavory friends. Insurance on the car for their protection in case of accidents, medical insurance, what the insurance doesn't cover, birthday parties at home (cheap ones) birthday presents, christmas presents, child care, broken arms, electric bills (kids use the lights) water bills (they take baths too), haircuts, college

That is a SMALL SMALL list of everything I pay for and trust me....he doesn't even come close to half. It takes more than that to support a child. My child goes to the dentist, needs braces ($5000.00) and he isn't paying for ANY OF THAT. i am. I buy clothes at thrift stores and on ebay when appropriate, I don't spend oodles of moeny on non important stuff. Expensive things that aren't needed are my responsibility

If it was only about what it takes to raise a child instead of the income of both parents then the numbers whould be even higher. Most courts look at what it would have taken to raise a child with the income of both parents had they stayed together. The man being punished is secondary...he's upset that his money has to take care of his baby. Worthless. There are worksheets that figure this out, it's not usually just some number in the sky amount.

People without kids don't know what it takes. And the women of men who pay child support are usually (not always) the ones who get the most angry about it cuz it takes money away from "them" nevermind the child involved. greedy and selfish and stupid.

Answer 5

I don't know what kind of women you know but the women I have known never got anywhere close to half of the costs to raise a child. And only about 50% of women get child support at all. I think you're operating under an incorrect premise.

Answer 6

Legally it is only about what is actually needed to support the child. When the numbers are crunched, each parent pays their fair share. So child support can never be used to punish the father unless the woman commits perjury or fraud to "fix" the numbers so that he pays more than his legal fair share or she pays less.

Answer 7

I can see your point BUT in my case at no point was it to punish him, just to try and get him to at the very least help out with the cash side of raising two of HIS children..............after all he picked to walk away from them, at the very least he could help out a bit.

BUT lets just state for the record I got $800.00 for a period of about 3 months when I finally tracked him down when the kids where 15 & 14.............and then guess what he left his job and fell into what ever hole he is currently in.........

So maybe when you have been battling for 15 + years to get him pay JUST a little you can get a tad bitter

Regards

Answer 8

personally i think it should be both. it took 2 to create the child it should be two supporting the child. in my case my babies sperm donor lives an hour away and has not even tried to see her and shes almost 3. i think he should be punished now because she's going to be hurt in the future by him not even attempting to be around. the support i do get goes into a fund for my daughter.

Answer 9

it should be about the children, problem I have is when the check arrives with some of these people they spend it on themselves......one person I knew support day meant new clothes (for her) and a night out usually trolling the bar, and nothing was spent on the child or their needs.

Answer 10

it is too support the child... some women take advantage of the situation and thats f%*k3d up..