They say dumb things like, "If your bored why don't you go do something." --My boyfriend and "If your lonely, go make friends." --Also my boyfriend
2007-01-20 05:25:00 · 4 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
My boyfriends always get's mad at me for rejecting this "advice" but it isn't really advice if it doesn't tell you anthing is it?
2007-01-20 05:31:55 · update #1
What I mean is they think it's easy for other people too.
2007-01-20 05:32:44 · update #2
We always think things that come easily to us should come easily to everyone. I've always done well in school and I wondered why other people didn't...when it's SO EASY to do well! I know exactly what you mean. People tell you to go out there and make friends like it's a piece of cake, but it's definitely not easy for everyone, just like school or surfing or knitting isn't easy for everyone. You need to really develop skills for whatever you're doing. People tend to minimize the skills required in making friends. We have schools to learn reading and math but we're forced to learn socialization skills on our own. It really sucks, doesn't it? Then when we don't know how to go about it, people look at us like we should just know how to. I think it takes practice and a lot of failiure before you start getting it right (I know, it sucks). Just start off simple. You won't make friends in one day, most likely. Start saying hi to people you're in school with, work with, or see regularly. If there are any that interest you in any way, ask a question or two. Start learning the basics about people and offer a little information about yourself. Share some stories from your experience and ask about theirs. This has to happen gradually though (so I'm told!). I tend to rush things and expect a new friend upon meeting...sometimes that works, but it seems like as an adult, that's less likely (unfortunately). I hate to say this, but there's no magic answer. Just talk here and there and when you find someone you like, think of what you want to know about them and what you want to share...and go from there.
2007-01-20 06:16:26 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
It IS easy. Just be nice to someone & talk to them. It really isn't that hard. I thought the same thing, until my mom told me what I just told you. I started talking to everyone & being nice to them. Sometimes, there are going to be people out there that you think you won't get along with cuz they're different from you. I thought that, too, but they're so nice, & you'll realize that being their friend is a great thing. Just go for it, & listen to your bf.
2007-01-20 14:14:32 · answer #2 · answered by Abby 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It actually IS easy for some people....
Not me though.
I'm never bored, though--I have a couple good friends to pass time with (I don't need more), I have tons of books to read, and a computer to play with...
2007-01-20 13:28:56 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
because they have them and don't need to worry about it. put yourself out more and try to get together with acquaintances.
2007-01-20 13:29:21 · answer #4 · answered by Jess B 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋