It's 6pm here in the UK and one of my best friends has just called to ask if I'll spend the evening with her. We wouldn't go out, just have a few drinks at her house. She suffered a bereavement earlier this week and I know she's feeling very low. Trouble is, I haven't seen my husband all week and he's on his way home from work expecting to spend the evening with me. What should I do?
2007-01-20 05:10:53 · 14 answers · asked by Away With The Fairies 7 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
If the bereavement is someone close to her then she needs you, go and take a bottle of wine around to her house and spend a few hours with her.
She wouldn't have asked you if she didn't really need you.
Explain that you can only stay a few hours and then tell your hubby to keep the bed warm and you'll make it up to him when you get home.
In normal circumstances I'd say spend the evening with hubby but at times of bereavement we need all the friends we've got!
2007-01-20 05:28:22 · answer #1 · answered by Poppy 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
When your friend needs you at this particular time, so does your husband.
He may understand how important it is for you to go and support your friend, but he might be utterly disappointed.
How often has this happened?
Who knows what can go through a man's head when he's constantly relegated to the second place in his wife's life.
I think the best would be to ask him to join you with your friend.
For one thing you won't feel too guilty and be away from him.
For a second thing, you'll be able to be totally available to your friend, not worrying thinking also about your hubby.
Besides, the more, the merrier for a few drinks.
You don't have to spend all night with your friend.xx
2007-01-20 07:14:56 · answer #2 · answered by Kc 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
yikes! tough one!
I'd say go with the husband; how well does he know your friend?
Could you go over to her for an hour; explaining in advance that he has made plans for the evening with you; let the husband know what you are doing, is it possible for him to pick you up from her place? In the meantime, make arrangements with your friend for a girly evening, just the two of you; tell her you are only at the end of a phone, and make that girly evening soon, maybe tomorrow night?
2007-01-20 05:29:12 · answer #3 · answered by marie m 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Ask your husband to go along. Have a few cocktails, leave early and spend the remainder of the evening alone. Whoever is driving shouldn't drink though. Your friend needs a little company. I'm sure your husband will understand.
2007-01-20 05:25:43 · answer #4 · answered by amazingly intelligent 7 · 1⤊ 2⤋
tell your husband that you need to see your friend for an hour on the way home you will pick up a takeaway and a movie for the two of you as you want to spend some time alone with him. tha tway you please both.
2007-01-20 05:30:20 · answer #5 · answered by NICOLA G 2 · 3⤊ 1⤋
Stay in with the husband, she'll still be feeling low tomorrow!
2007-01-20 05:16:04 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 3⤋
Stick around and see what your husband is talking about ...
2007-01-20 05:39:13 · answer #7 · answered by collard greens with hash browns 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
you should tell your husband that your friend needs someone right now and that while it may be a disappointment to him right now, you can make it up to him tomorrow.
your friend probably needs consolation. you wouldn't be much of a friend if you didn't help her out in her time of need.
do what's best.
2007-01-20 05:17:05 · answer #8 · answered by Marguerite R 2 · 2⤊ 3⤋
Why not all 3 of you together?
Play some games or something--that always cheeers me up!
2007-01-20 05:17:25 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 2⤋
Go with the husband. Your friend has ither friends, your husband only has one wife (I hope?).
2007-01-20 05:15:11 · answer #10 · answered by Chrisssy 2 · 2⤊ 2⤋