I know this person for a year
I was trying to know him better & be close to him but he showed me that he is interested in physical relation not love.
Though I was always nice to him – I never thought some body would treat me like this – guys could you give me a reason ?
Note: I am not ugly
2007-01-20 03:44:02 · 6 answers · asked by Rachel 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
First of all, have you talked about it? Did he told you he only wanted a physical relation? Have you told him how you feel? Because if you accepted at first that your relation was just physical, there is not much you can do, because you accepted it and he took it, the only option would be to discuss with him your feelings and see what he has to say. Remember that others treat you the way you let to treat you, so if he has let you know that he wants only physical and you let it happen, its your fault also, and if you let him treat you bad and say nothing about it, its also your fault, you have to defend yourself and dont let that happen, no matter who he is.
But, if you have never talked about this, and you fell for him and he never told you he was looking for something only physical, I think you have the same problem that most women do, we try to make everything easy to them, thats the way we let them know we want them with us, the problem is that there is no challenge for them, lets face it, they need to fight for you or they wont take you seriously. This has nothing to do with you, if you are ugly or not, this has to do with your attitute towards him, your strategy. But it has been long enough now, you cant expect him to change, and you cant change your strategy now because it can get even worse. What you need to do is talk to him, tell him how you feel, your reasons to be there waiting for him, and tell him you are not willing to accept or tolerate that kind of treatment, that you deserve better, that you hoped that someday he would understood that you were there without complaints because you loved him, but that it is enough. But, you cant expect him to do anything for you, you should tell him also that you are not expecting him to do anything, that he doesnt need to say anything, but that you had enough and that is the end of it. This is really hard to do, to let him go, but that will show him that you respect yourself and he will know that he cant treat you like that anymore, and he will admire you for that. This doesnt mean that he will be asking you for forgiveness or for another chance, he might just walk away, but it will certainly change his image of you, that in a case, if he doesnt feel anything for you, he will just walk away, but thinking better of you, like someone who didnt allow herself to be his toy, and not just any other girl he fool around with and did as he pleased. On the other side, if he feels something for you, this may let him see what you really are, and not only what he thought of you, and this will make him admire you and respect you and make him think if he was doing wrong with you, if it was a mistake, and do something to fix and not loose you. You need a lot of courage to do this, because you need to say him goodbye and just hope for the best, either he goes away and you get over him, or he realizes what a great girl you are and make him change his mind, its a huge risk to take, but its worth it, for you, you deserve better, think about yourself and what is the best for you.
2007-01-20 06:37:12 · answer #1 · answered by Helle 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Don't take it personally. There are many reasons why he acted that way and none have anything to do with you.
It could be he isn't ready for a committed relationship. He could be so selfish that he doesn't appreciate your friendship or he feels uncomfortable in a close relationship with ANY woman. And, the truth is, there are some guys out there who aren't mature enough and are just out for sex.
If that isn't what you want, move on. There are plenty of guys out there who kind, loving and emotionally ready for closeness!
2007-01-20 11:53:25 · answer #2 · answered by DannyGirl 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Girl dont take that for him being rude at least he was honest enough to let you know what hes looking for some men wont even do that just take advantage of you. If he did take advantage of you he isnt deserving of your love anyways. If he didnt maybe thats just the point in his life hes at. Maybe he just wants to play the field for a while and doesnt want to settle down. Maybe some girl broke his heart at some point and hes just not ready to try that again. Men are pretty simple enough they want usually 2 or 3 things...... SEX, FOOD, & THE GAME!! hahaha. Not all of them but most of them are pretty easy to sum it up...... If you really want him to want you girl make him want you. My husband I was friends with him about 6 months before we even started dating and I made him want me so bad....... Its the little things you can do to make yourself appealing to him.
1. Have some self confidence in yourself/ your the prize
( im beautiful any man would be lucky to be with me) dont be arrogant just confident
2. Send yourself some flowers from an admiror
( I dont care what any man says they always want what they think they cant have)
3. Cook for him
4. dont put any expectations on him
5. dont need him (men like to be needed but they dont like a needy woman) if that makes sense.....hahaha
6. Dress in something sexy
7. if hes into sports through on some jeans and share that with him.... you dont have to if you really dont like sports instead maybe buy him tickets to a game he likes or a souvenire of some sorts.
8. make yourself available but not desperate
9. give him space
10. DONT NAG ( the biggest mistake so many woman make is nagging)
unfortunately a lot is a game its how you play it but these thins I have mentioned are all little things that can make him notice you or that you stand out and keep this motto to your heart
"I can do bad by myself" that and "I can please myself better than any man can or ever will" and it really is true get to know yourself have fun with yourself treat yourself the way you expect a man to treat you if he cant do it any better hes not worth it. good luck girl!
2007-01-20 12:04:17 · answer #3 · answered by jlofayetteville 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Rude - - gruff, abusive, impolite,
Sounds like he is obsessed with sexual matters only and doesn't want any kind of a relationship. I would definitely stay away from a creep like him.
2007-01-20 11:54:30 · answer #4 · answered by Angell 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He just wants sex. Why are you still there? Are you waiting for him to want anything more or trying to change his mind? Just leave the guy alone and just be friends.
2007-01-20 11:48:18 · answer #5 · answered by Tasha 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Why even be friends? There's no such thing for this fool.
2007-01-20 11:49:05 · answer #6 · answered by starryeyed 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋