Why do some women want to be controlled by their boyfriends or husbands? Isn't it better to be independent rather than to have some man ordering you around?
2007-01-20 01:33:31 · 23 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Alot of women have "doormat" personalities.. i'll be honest im one of them.. the ultimate "people pleaser" want to be everything to everyone..do whatever it takes to make someone happy even if it means jepordizing ur own personal happiness.. and unfortunately ive been in my share of bad relationships.. couldnt understand for along time why things would start out so great in the beginning, then end up with him disrespecting me, and barking out orders to me.. till i realized it was my own fault..
What happens is that people pleaser type personalities want to do whatever it takes to make the person they love happy, they will change everything about themselves to suit someone else..and what happens is over time the male realizes that the people pleaser is willing to do whatever.. and starts using that to their advantage, first in a personal sense.. as far as cooking, cleaning ect and them just being lazy in front of the tv being waited on hand and foot..etc.. then eventually they start pushing even further trying to get away with things usuing the people pleasers personality against her to get away with what they want..and once they see how much power they have over her.. they start using it.. its a matter of the people pleaser losing all the respect she once had from him.. and then she ends up usually in a mentally abusive , possibly physically abusive relationship and usually doesnt know how to get out by then because it doesnt happen over night it gradually happens to a point she wakes up one day wondering how it happened, and how did she get into this mess and how does she get out.. by then they usually have her "trapped" and its really hard to get out of that situation once u are.. its possible.. but its hard..
2007-01-20 02:18:55 · answer #1 · answered by brwneyedgrl 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Stay clear of those type of women... I'm sure you would anyway (if your a strong, independent man).
The reason.. *Habit* - previous relationships, where she may have been forced into that role. *Enjoyment* - some women like the submissive role, like my mum. She's been with her husband for 25 years and they are very much in love. *Fear* - maybe they feel it is expected of them and fear that it may cause friction, so they do it to avoid arguement.
Personally I have not and will never be controlled by any man... not even my father! I think its degrading.
2007-01-20 01:42:38 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Some women don't mind being controlled because they don't want to do go out and have to be independent and think for themselves. Quite a few women still have that mentality that being with him,and doing things for him,is a pleasing job,but what they don't realize they are setting up relationships that make them dependent or co-dependent upon others,for things like their self-worth,money,relationship happiness.
I personally know,I found life more fullfilling when I'm living it and not having someone tell me how to live it.
2007-01-20 01:38:47 · answer #3 · answered by Ellie 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I don't know about other women, but this woman dosen't like to be controlled by anyone, my man can give me advice but thats just about as far as it goes. And i have never been ordered around,( i guess it must be the aries in me)
2007-01-20 01:43:52 · answer #4 · answered by sweetemtation_123 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I know too many smart intelligent woman controlled by their husband. I ask them for opinion/advise and they will tell me I will get back to you, I have to ask my husband. Now I have reached a point I dont go to them for advise cause I know all matters will be shared with the husband.
These woman are successful in careers (some are doctors) and smart in everything they do.
For some reason, either the husband has controlled her or she likes to ask him for every darn thing.
2007-01-20 01:41:48 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Some women crave/need constant attention and don't think of this "control" as a bad thing. It's better for them to know that their mate is "thinking" of them and not someone else. Now, when it gets to the point of mental and physical abuse, I have a problem with women enduring this because it makes the guy think he can mistreat any and everyone...including his kids.
I had a girlfriend in high school who broke up with me because I didn't want to hit her. I can't see myself hitting a woman. I separated from my psycho-***** wife because I felt like I wanted to bash her in the head. I love my kids too much to harm their mother.
2007-01-20 01:39:01 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
It is the natural order of things.Unfortunately we as men have failed to stand up like men and have given women a valid reason to want to be independent.Just because a women wants her man to take charge/controll does not mean that she wants to be abused or mistreated.She just wants to be loved .
2007-01-20 06:59:56 · answer #7 · answered by zachary b 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
some men think women want to be controlled but most times its not that at all. We want interaction, feedback, suggestions, ideals, we want the man to sit down with us and help make good decisions together. But the man will get the notion that we just want him to find solution and do it all by himself missing the real reason for our submission.
2007-01-20 02:44:46 · answer #8 · answered by simple 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Some woman are needy and dependant on a man. Also, they might think tha is all they are worth or they grew up seeing a man control a woman.
2007-01-20 03:46:43 · answer #9 · answered by Alapooh 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I think that the reason for this is maybe they didn't have a dad role model and they search for that.They want that control over them, then it might be a sexually thing Who knows why. For me, i don't want my husband to be controling over me
2007-01-20 07:31:45 · answer #10 · answered by ? 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋