I am 18 yrs. old and I just moved out of my parents house last Sept. into my own apt. on campus at school.I have always known that I liked boys for as long as I can remember and I just began to accept the fact that I am bisexual.I always said that I would come out when I moved out I would come out, but I can't muster up enough confidence to do it.When I was smaller (like 5) my dad caught me with another boy and he flipped and I remember that 'til this day.I was terrified, my mom has asked me before about my sexuality when I was in middle school and I just brushed her off. I think she knows but I still am not sure.I think she will accept me but my dad is a whole nother ball game.He got mad because I watched Jackass 2 and the guys perform gay looking stunts.I dont have a car yet so I have to see them on a reg. basis because they take me to work.I have a boyfriend that I believe I am in love with.Sould I come out now or wait?If I do should I tell them about my bf?Whats a suddle way 2 tell
2007-01-19 19:44:30 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous Guy 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
Wow, this is a tough situation. If you're still dependent on them for necessary transportation and they would cut you off from your gainful employment if you told the truth.... I hate to say it, but keep it to yourself until you can find your own ride. I know... I know, it's awful to keep your authentic self under wraps, but losing your job would probably screw you out of being able to support yourself. You'd have to move back with them and then how would you deal with them knowing and being under their roof again? I mean, your mom sounds like she could deal... but your dad could be a real problem.
2007-01-19 19:58:32 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
I would agree with what other people said before and wait till you're truly ready. It's not my place to tell you when either.
However, I do have some advice to give for when you decide you are ready. First of all, I would tell your mom first as she seems to be the more tolerant one from what you have said and probably know what you are anyway. Second, ask her to be with you when you come out to your father and say that you can't do so without her support. Third, all three of you should join a PFLAG chapter in your area. If your dad won't join, then at the very least the two of you should. You may be worried that this will drive a wedge between your dad and both of you, but remember that he is driving the wedge with his hate. If you haven't already done so, join a GLBT group on campus. That way you'll have some friends at school.
2007-01-20 14:51:19 · answer #2 · answered by Megosophy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You know that you dont really have to tell nobody about your sexuality but If you Feel that is going to release some stress, what you got to do is tell your Mom. Now becaureful because like you say you dont have a reliable mode of transportation. Save some money and get you a car just in case they don't want to help you anymore after you tell them. Regardless how the situation turns out, remember that is your life and you have to understand that they love you and they want the best for you but not all the time what it seems good for you from their point of view is not what it could seems good for you on your own opinion. It's your life and you only live once. Live it up to the Max. Good luck!!!
2007-01-20 06:40:25 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If your parents are helping to pay for your tuition at school, now is NOT a good time to rock the boat.
Wait till you're out of school and they have no financial hold over you.
The last thing you need is for your parents to be so upset that they refuse to help pay you're tuition!! Then you'll be stuck somewhere without a place to live, without a college degree, and without a decent job.
Make sure you're able to support yourself should the worst happen when you're finally ready to come out!
Best wishes.
2007-01-20 03:58:57 · answer #4 · answered by kerrisonr 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you feel like you're not ready to come out, do not come out. coming out takes time, a lot of time. i think the worst case scenario is if somebody just out of the blue tells their parents hey you know what i'm gay! that might be good for you but very hard for your parents. My advice will be to just be you and do things you want to do. When it comes to subtle ways to tell i was watching this show about lesbians one day and my dad came there to bother me and we got into a fight and i yelled at him stop stalking my lifestyle, and that pretty much did it.
2007-01-20 06:02:27 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
if you have questions about whether or not you should tell them, I'd wait. I waited until they needed to know... I had developed a support group beyond my familky, was (am) seeing a man I love, and had even found a supportive church community. Ask yourself, how will it help you for them to know? Take your time....
2007-01-24 08:10:30 · answer #6 · answered by tomi27410 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are still dependent on them hold off for a little bit. If you do want to tell them, tell your mom first so she can help with telling your dad.
2007-01-25 10:17:29 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
contact pflag.org- a nat'l educational, supportive group there to be of assistance to lgbt people and their families/friends. They will help you come out to your folks and also give them the info & support they need to be more accepting. good luck
2007-01-26 22:22:26 · answer #8 · answered by reme_1 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
dont tell them they probably know you are a pervert but do not want to hear it from thier son. save them some agony
2007-01-25 11:12:13 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Invite them over for supper and your boyfriend too.
2007-01-20 03:49:35 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋