Ok...So I dont consider looking/watching porn cheating. But I caught my husband with a profile at a sex website. On it his profile said he was divorced and had no kids (we have 2 and are married) This site basically solicites sex. It is meant for people to find others to "have fun" with. on his profile he typed things like "looking for a night of commitment free fun" and he goes away to places for his job...but posted where he was going. (ex. he went to daytona two weekends ago...his response to an email from a girl on this website said " I will be in daytona this weekend and would really like to meet up...have drinks...dinner and maybe more...") He swears he never met up with any of the girls...that he was just "curious what was out there," but would you still consider this cheating? Whether he met up with them or not aside...would you consider this "sex solicitation" cheating?
2007-01-19 18:15:34 · 40 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
There's no question in my mind that it's cheating because his intent was there to cheat and he would have if you didn't catch him. Any right minded woman would agree. Now are you going to take this as a sign and get some marriage counseling or are you going to end it knowing that once a cheater always a cheater?
What he did was premeditated, that he thought this out, and that it took time for him to set up a profile, send emails, schedule to meet women, have a place to meet, and so on. Do you think that if he had used all this energy he put in to meeting other women in to your marriage that things would be better, I do. This behavior is calculated and deceptive. Do you really want to be with someone like that? You deserve so much better. You deserve a good man for you and your kids.
For me I would take this as a chance to look back on my marriage and see if I thought there was something to save. I would also look at the fact that he was going to have sex with someone. I would see that even though I had children with him I deserved so much more. Because I know that if I try to work things out that if he doesn't like how things are going with me he can do it again.
2007-01-19 19:08:20 · answer #1 · answered by Serinity4u2find 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes either he will cheat or he is! U know u can get him in trouble w/ the site 4 lying!! Look @ his profile & c if any office travels co-inside with his messages. If there r ask him & tell him if he continues w/ the profiles u will assume that he is cheating & will consider leaving him!! Tell him that he'll need the profile & he won't have 2 fix the married 2 divorced because he already has himself divorced!!
2007-01-19 18:38:46 · answer #2 · answered by Missy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it's called BETRAYAL! He doesn't need to be going onto any web site and doing this. He is trying to see if the grass is greener on the other side. He is wrong in every sense of the word. Even if he's going through a possible "mid" life crisis. I hope that you got the e-mail address from this girl and write her asking her if they hooked up in Daytona. You have to decide for yourself if he's lying to you or not. You know him, but a little investigating will help you out. Best of luck!
2007-01-19 18:24:05 · answer #3 · answered by lil' miss 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
well, I honestly think your husband has some fessing up to do. In the meantime you sadly but true can't be the one to point fingers. Consider this his trial period. Express to him openly what you feel uncomfortable with and watch to see if you notice any changes. Don't play investigator we only hurt ourselves more. We tend to want to know everything. We will but in due time. So in the mean time continue to be a good wife and strengthen yourself for when the time comes (if) when you catch him. You'll need everything you have then to fight. But now you really have nothing to go off on. Don't get me wrong he definitely sounds like he would willingly have an affair if given the chance so don't cut too much slack on him.
2007-01-19 18:27:38 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Absolutely. He may not have committed the physical act, but marriage isn't just about the physical act of sex. It's about commitment and trust, too. The fact that he's "curious what was out there" is a breach of his wedding vows to you to love, honor & cherish you. It is also a betrayal to his children. If he wants "a night of commitment free fun" he should go bowling but not join a league!
Good luck! I'm sorry to say that you most likely have a very difficult road ahead of you.
2007-01-19 18:22:44 · answer #5 · answered by DOOL64 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
in case you're questioning, it likely is. each and anytime you experience an emotional connection with some different person, any type of contact that feels intimate - might want to properly be only talking or texting, yet feels close, brings you in the route of that man or woman - is dishonest. in case you're literally not emotionally in touch, then those similar issues are only pleasant. also i'm assuming by kissing you mean a kiss on the cheek, because on the mouth or deep kissing is honestly in the course of the line.
2016-11-25 21:46:51 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
"Sex solicitation"? Ok, How do you know it was just "solicitation"; I'm sure he got more than that; He set a profile, tells lies and keeps emailing girls just for nothing!! You are a fool if you fell for that fat lie. He is cheating, and having sex.
But just to please you, lets say he "just" "solicited"; if you do a murder for hire "solicitation" to an undercover cop you go to jail just for the "solicitation", because "solicitation" is as bad as getting away with it.
Now ask yourself: "Do I want to get HIV (AIDS) for being a fool?" "Do I want to spend years in pain and fear for a sex maniac HIV infected cheating husband?" “Who will take care of your kids when both parents get sick and dead by HIV (AIDS)?" "Will you be happy that after your are dead your kids were left with some pervert pedophilic family? (it had happened)" If you want to live then BE STRONG for your kids, your husband doesn’t care for them, or your health and life.
2007-01-19 18:44:45 · answer #7 · answered by ? 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He is meeting girls!!! He is just lying to you. Get on that site and sign up as someone else and see if he meets you somewhere. Or have a good trusted friend do it for you. That'll bust him...lol. Oh and get tested for AIDS. Anyone who is looking for sex on the internet and goes out and does it probably has AIDS. If he is that curious then he is cheating on you, don't be blind!!! And if you do bust him, you will know for sure and it will be easier to leave him.
2007-01-19 18:30:57 · answer #8 · answered by toothfairy.2006 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes, he cheated on you emotionally...my husband did something similiar...he was telling girls he was chatting to that he was divorced too with just his older son (we're married with two toddlers)....when I asked him about it, he says he never met up with them, but the online sex was just an escape, an fantasy...I told him when you exchanged numbers you crossed every realm there was...
There's a great chance that he probably did meet with some girls, but truth is you'd never know unless he tells you himself or you get hold of those girls and they confess.
Why can't they just be honest with us???
2007-01-19 18:23:20 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Girl get a hold of your man, he is doing some naughty stuff, he is lying, no he may not have met up withthem but he would and will, put your foot down or leave him he is a cheater, or better yet post you a little fancy profile and do it right back to him, show him and say "well i'm not going to meet up with any of them"
2007-01-19 18:21:20 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋