How much freedom do you give 12 year olds?

Question

I have a 12 year old daughterand sometimesshe has sleepovers with friends.We live not far from the shops.Its a fairly safe community.Should I let them go and have a milkshake by themselves.?At what age and how much freedom do you give 12 year old girls?These girls are fairly responsible.They will be in grade 7 next year and the majority will be travelling long distances to high schools.As a parent I would like them to see movies on their own and dont want to be seen as arestrictive parent but I realise I have a duty of care.We rely on public transport which means I travel with the girls.What are the thoughts of other parents?Their parents work.

I am aware of all the dangers.In Australia apsychologist is telling us that we are wrapping our kids in cotton wool not letting kids go to the local playground by themselves like we used to I am confused.

No I would not let them go out at night. All the girls have mobile phones.We actually live near a police station.We live in a safe neighbourhood compared to lots of other places.

Answer 1

when i was 12, wherever i went, my parent went. Yes my parents were known as the "overbearing" ones, but they really didn't care. Now that i am 15, they are just letting me go places with friends without them being there! Me and my friends joke about it now, but then, it wasn't funny. You can go to the movies with them, just sit in the back of the theater (away from them), or what my friends mom did once was she went to see a whole different movie. And unless your daughter is having daytime sleepovers, i don't think that she should be walking around at night. That's just what i've learned so far from being under my parents roof, but if you feel differently, that's you.

Answer 2

bypass to mall w/ pals or bypass to distinct save than figure.... If it became an enclosed mall, it became with pals and also you had your cellular telephone, then likely, or perchance no longer till thirteen. See a movie w/pal(s) w/o figure ... type of a similar answer because the mall. except also: i'd opt for to appeal to close what action picture it became and can want to disallow it if it became rated larger than PG. Date... no no no. 12 is a lot too youthful to this point. Allowance - puzzling to assert. about $5-10, yet completely relies upon on the relations and chores. What should be my bedtime... sometime between 9 and 10 pm. Later if no college the subsequent day. What should be my curfew... You mean curfew once you're out? the in reality position you could bypass at evening is a pal's position with a accountable figure, and that i %. you up at a time prepared with that figure.

Answer 3

I am a mother of 3. 14, 10, 8. My 14 is smart and almost grown. But my 10 year old is more mature. I would not let either of them go anywhere out of my sight or the sight of a chaperone. There is just too much crime in this world. I think movies and a milkshake age is around 17. They are older and can hopefully drive and be able to make more mature choices. I know they are going to grow up and want to date and have sleep overs and party, but there is a proper age for all of that. Lots of people think because its the 21st century we are free to do whatever we want at a young age. And that is far from true. Good Luck on your decision!

Answer 4

When I was 12 years old I didn't have any restrictions, but I was responsible, I didn't go out every night late at night. Only once in a while.. and my town is probably worse than your safe little community. Going to get a milkshake? As long as shes with friends.

Answer 5

In this day and age 12 years old need a bit more supervision then they think! You hear about children being abducted all of the time and I am not comfortable with twelve year old children being out on the town alone! There really are no "safe" communities any more! So sad but so true. Try to let her have sleepovers with her friends.If you let her go to her friends house, make sure you know there will be an adult to supervise and look in on them. I do not think you are being too restrictive at this age! I think when children go to movies at 12 there needs to be an adult on hand to supervise. If she must go a short distance to a shop, make sure she carries a cell phone so that she can be reached and you know she is OK. Make these trips short and make sure she is trust worthy and will return when she says she will. Make sure she knows that it is important she know not to talk to or go up to strangers and autos. It is OK for her to fight and scream if she is accosted. I would not feel comfortable letting her go but you may feel differently. I taught my children to NEVER talk to strangers and to run if accosted! These days you have to prepare them and can never be too careful! They are all grown now! Just my opinion!

Answer 6

I live on a main road with the deli only a 10minute walk and I would not let my 14 year old daughter walk up by herself. I trust her but don't trust other people & my reason is I was walking behind my daughter & her best friend both were dressed appropriately and 3 different car loads of boys yelled out suggestive remarks to them & honking their horns. I couldn't believe it. However I will allow her to go to the movies with her brother or go shopping with a group of friends only if I take them to & from.I also get to know the friends & their families before I allow her going off with any of them. While they go to the movies why don't you watch a movie you would like or only allow them to go to movies when you have something else to do in town?

Answer 7

i'm a machure 13 with a modile phone and i CAN'T....

ride my bike to the BK around the corner
go to a movie with just me and a friend
go to the mall with me and a friend
meet a friend at an arcade with out an adult

I can....
have a sleepover
ride my bike around the neighborhood

i also live in a safe community there is a police station right by my house

Answer 8

Hmmm well in my country women and girls can't go out by themselves without the accompaniment of their husband, father, or close male relative. The only time girls go out by themselves is to school and then home. Now if I were living in the USA I wouldn't give my daughters any freedom to go out alone here either especially since they'll be Muslims.

Answer 9

I am 12 myself, so my opinion will probably mean very little to you, but i say, do not leave these girls alone! Walk them there and back and wait outside if you must. If you really want to give them freedom, let them go, but tell your daughter to call/message you(if she has a phone) when she gets there and when she's leaving. It may sound a little drastic, but it must be done. If she(or one of her friends) doesn't have a phone, then stick to walking with her.

Answer 10

just keep in mind that the age girls are most often abducted and abused at is right around 12.. fairly safe community means nothing. just takes one weirdo and those are everywhere. i defintely would never let any of them go anywhere ALONE. like even walking down the street to their friends house. always in groups.