I have a problem. I grew up in a home with MANY problems, no male figures, only mom, sisters, aunts, female cousins...etc., It was also in a bad neighborhood, so I basically grew a tough skin in order to protect myself and stay out of trouble. The problem is that I haven't grown out of it. People see me as "aggressive" or "tough" , when deep down inside I am the total opposite.
Even the closest people to me feel that way (or so I've heard)
I know I shouldn't go out of my way to prove anything to people (and believe me, I've tried and I come out feeling silly), but it's driving me crazy. It's not like I dress like a dude or anything, I'm just a little more reserved and cautious than females my age, I'm 23 btw. When I do "dress-up" I get teased for being too "slutty" (by my own family, mind you.) I feel really confused, embarrassed and insecure, to say the least. I would love to act the way I feel on the inside, but I'm afraid of what my family might think (that I'm doing it to...
2007-01-19 15:03:46 · 4 answers · asked by p00mkin 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Other - Society & Culture
...convince them, or w/e) Sometimes I just like being the way I am. I know the answer to this might be "forget what other people think", but that hasn't worked. Please advise. Thanx to all!
2007-01-19 15:06:31 · update #1
I don't think it really matters who, what or where you were brought up, most times it depends on the personality you were born with. (I have two teens a boy (loves sports, follows rules, kind and sensitive) and a girl (loves sports , thinks there should be no rules,not so sensitive, dresses boyish and girlish depends on the mood) and they were around males and females all their lives.
First, dress the way you want to dress, you are of age aren't you, but if your not up with the times then ask a close friend to help you with your wardrobe or look around and see what everyone is wearing (remember you can look sexy without showing your goods).
Second, if you believe that your personality needs work and want to change then try things like: think before you speak, don't talk loud , make sure that what your saying is not going to be hurtful, unkind, offensive or ghetto like. Again ,ask a close friend to help you become a more approachable person.
If all else fails, just be yourself and enjoy life. If people don't like you for who you are then they just don't know how to have fun and are just not worth your time.
2007-01-19 16:02:13 · answer #1 · answered by trojan 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i went through the same thing, i grew up in the most dangerous parts of los angeles, when i was in high school my family got out, i couldnt believe that every city wasnt the same, i worked hard to change the way i talked and even the way i dressed it wasnt easy but after a while it became normal for me, keep at it its almost like practice
2007-01-19 23:17:35 · answer #2 · answered by el chavo 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I know you don't want to hear that you should not care what other ppl say or think; but you have to. People(everywhere) are going to say and think what they want to think; whether it's the truth or not. You claim to be tougher(inside) than most girls; well than; toughen up. Stand-up for yourself...live your life for YOU; not for anyone else. If you try to act, dress, and live how you are expected; and not how you want to; you will live a very depressed life.
2007-01-19 23:26:36 · answer #3 · answered by shaylea29 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Everyone has an opinion. It's your opinion that counts when speaking of yourself. Don't let it affect you. I've heard it said once, " opinions are like a**holes, everyone has one, and they all stink".
2007-01-19 23:26:51 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋