I feel So messed up in life if anyone can help me with advice it would be much appreciated?

Question

Hi, I am 21 years old and have just recently opened my eyes to the world and thought oh my god what have I done. I left college at age 17 and for some reason went to work in a dead job because my family is poor and I needed money. at the time I enjoyed having the money and just thought short term. its 4 years on and I am in the same situation I live with my parents I have no qualifications and it seems I have no friends. because they all moved on and now have their own lives like new friends from unis and jobs and their own homes and stuff where as i am still stuck with my parents. I had the girl of my dreams but she grew up and has realised im no good and just recently said she doesn't want to be with me anymore as she is going to uni and I don't excite her anymore.I don't see how I will move on in life I applied for apprenticeships but they all say I'm too old I thought about going back to college but everyone will be 16 and I wouldn't fit in. I have no confidence in anything help me

Answer 1

go back to college or you will be with your parents till you are 51or longer

Answer 2

Go back to school! Pretend you're only 16 too, it'll be fun and you can shag all the 16-year-old girls.

But seriously now ... I understand that you might feel too old for it but you'll feel even older if you leave it until you're 25 ... or 30. So go for it now!

Can I just say that I'm glad you've realised now, while you're still young, that you need to make some changes. There are so many people so much older than you who think that there's nothing wrong with being uneducated and having dead-end jobs, or even worse just claiming benefits. I know that you will be able to make a change for the better. Good luck!

Answer 3

don't worry

I know that people go to college in many different countries at the age of 16, so you are sfive year out, but don't worry. You will be able to use your work experience to your advantage. You will very much appreciate college. You don't realize it now, but that your work experience has molded you. You have benefitted form it. Don't feel like you have wasted your life. And, maybe that girl was not for you. You helped your parents out with a job and they needed some money.
If you have the funds, go back to college.
You will have new experiences and new friends and they will not care about what age you are.
You might even find that some of those people are your age.
Each person has their own path to follow. No, you did not do things like your friends, but that is okay. You know what it is like not to have a college education and be a worker. Remember this, it might help you to have empathy with those who could not afford to go to college and have to work without a college education.
That girl might come back to you, maybe not.
But, you will have new experiences that will challenge you and excite you.

Yes, you are still young and you still have many many ppportunities. I know some people did not go to college until they were in their sixties.
So, what do you want to do?
What is it that you want to go into?

Answer 4

Maybe it just took some time for you to be ready to commit to the type of work it will take to be a success in college. It's not too late for you to decide what you want to do. First of all, you have to realize that you have talents and gifts. You just have to decide what they are and what you want to do with them. Don't be overly concerned with how your friends are living their lives. You have to make choices that will help you to have a better life. Focus on you. Many people marry too young and end up divorcing. You are taking the time to find yourself and to discover your true heart and calling in life. Once you do that, you will be in a better place to decide what kind of woman is right for you. If you want to seek a career that requires a college education, then today is the day to start. Sitting back and bemoaning your fate will only lead you to more sorrow. The first step may be difficult, but it will lead you down the path to a better future. Also...you aren't "stuck" with your parents. It's all in perception. You are blessed to have parents who support and love you and are happy to give you a place to call home while you work on having that better tomorrow. Now, make a plan of action...make some decisions...and move forth from that point. You can do only what you allow yourself to do.

Answer 5

You stepped in and helped your family when they needed it. You made a great sacrifice. You should feel proud of yourself not down on yourself. I guess she really wasn't the girl of your dreams if she figued she was better than you because you put your family first. And as for going back to school, When I first when to collage I had a lady that was 68 and working on her first degree. College is made up of all age groups and you will probably make friends there that will be there for you for life. You may also find that special girl there as well my brother did and they have been married now for years. Keep your chin up and believe in yourself and things will turn out fine Good luck and hope this helped.

Answer 6

Hey Cantona! relax! it really isnt all that bad! congrats on losing such a selfish girlfriend to start with, she was going to bring you down.
You can go back to college, there are mature students, and really your only a baby, go in and inquire, mention your not happy with the age thing, I personally dont think its a problem.
You will always meet new friends once you get out, you can meet friends chatting online over time too. Don't just talk about it, go into your college tomorrow and do something about it, find out your options, go through all the things you want to do in your head and work on them.
When things get harder I just take it one day at a time, so can you! nobody has died and its not the end of the world. You are NOT a loser so get that out of your head for starters.
You are trying to get things in order, first step in the right direction is asking for advice now get working on things and dont give up, you are stronger than you think.

Answer 7

I am 45 and have just finished an access course at college and have been excepted at Keele uni. So at 21 you have lots of options, you say the girl of your dreams has gone to uni, well show her you are just as good if not better than her. Get an education it will be worth it in the end.

Answer 8

sounds almost like a mirror image of my life early life.
I left school age 16, I lost contact with the girl of my dreams too at the same time, for many reason i lost touch with her and her with me.
I went to work in several stores on what was then known as YTS scheme.
i was still at my parents at age 28. when i was eventualy kicked out of the family home. which turned out for the best for me.
however for you, i'd say go back to college or do an open university course or two. in a subject that not only interests you but one that you can turn in to a passion and so will benefit your life finacially too.
alternatively if you can not afford to pay for a college or uni course then you could borrow books from the library and read and attempt to understand what you are reading.
then if you are lucky your newly found skills can be used to start your own career, may be with a loan from your bank etc.
but you have to do something.

as for your girlfriend if she means the world to you then ask her what is wrong other than not exciting as you put it. may be you can both do the same uni course, and rekindle the spark of the relationship. nothing worth having in life comes easy, romance and love is the same; relationships take work to keep them alive, and keep the passion burning.
it is your life, only you know what is right for you. but get over it, and stop worrying about fitting in at college or uni, you would be there to learn not make friends. so what if you are a little older than everyone else sod the rest of the world, if they are small minded enough to make you feel uncomfortable for bettering yourself pitty them but don't let them win by giving in and staying away. as for confidence that will come with time as you learn and grow, in your chosen subjects.
for example: I only answer questions on here that i'm confident about providing an answer to that i have experiance of. as i had the worlds worst education at my local schools. I only know what i know because I have experianced the problems and the solutions to those problems in the computers and the home electronics sections. as for life love and romance well i'm only saying what is the opposite to what i've done in my life and so i know what does not work, making me able to list the things that should work.

to sum up, fight to keep your girlfriend tell her you love her and will do anything for her, if that is what you are wanting and willing to do to keep her.
as for your education, go back to college or uni, and ignore anyone who puts you down for bettering yourself.

just my opinion based on my lifes experiance.
good luck.

Remeber every day we lear something new, be that education, or gossip, or even the news on tv or papers.
so do as i do try and learn something new each day, my next task is to learn a few simple programming and other computer related skills to boost my current limited knowledge.
but thats me. find something youhave a passsion for besides your girlfriend that you can earn serious cash on/ from.

good luck. and remember IT iS your LIFE so do what is right for you. Not what anyone else tells you to do.

Answer 9

i am sorry that you feel that way i hope things get better for you its nothing wrong with still being home with your parents yes its very hard out here on your own you are still young please go back to college its not to late i understand that you really like her but let go if she really care about you she wouldn't have left you you have other things to try to get together most of all school it don't matter how old you are that's the only way to make it keep your head up never let no tell you that you cant do something good luck

Answer 10

Join the military and learn a skill. You'll love it because you will make something of yourself. The signing bonuses are getting bigger plus they help pay for college. Try to join the Air Force as a pilot. Then, you can get a high-paying job as a pilot at a major airline when you get out. Anything would work though.

Answer 11

1) Don't worry about what everyone else is doing
2) You're still young....very young.
3) Go back to school and don't worry about how old those around you are. You might want to try a community college at first. All types go to college.
4) After you get to school, do your work
5) You'll get new friends and you're life WILL change.

Good Luck!