what do i do now?

Question

i'm 16, gf is 17. she is 8 months pregnant and we're having troubles. we keep fighting and i think it might be over between us. i love her so much but i can't keep doing this. i have a bad temper that gets out of control sometimes and she doesn't like that... who does? anyway, i don't want it to end like this, i don't want our relationship to end at all...what do i do now?

i've tried to take a break so we can get some alone time, but she gets mad at me for it...she tells me to grow up and i've been trying very hard to, but then she acts immature.

Answer 1

It doesn't mean it is over just because you fight---I have been married a long time, and if we left each other just because we have problems, we wouldn't be together. Remember---your relationship is CHANGING, and you are going to be three of you now. Get counseling---that is what all good couples do when they want to work things out.

I hope you don't mind me adding a little extra: be more understanding with her now. She is very hormonal being pregnant. She might be more moody and cry more, but the hormones are preparing for childbirth. This may be the reason why you all are fighting more

Good luck

Answer 2

Man, I hate to say it because it seems a bit sexist, but truth be told, pregnant women are bitchy. You should just smile and put up with the verbal abuse and not take it to heart too much. I don't know anyone who didn't bicker constantly with their partner during pregnancy. It's not even the hormones so much as you just feel so crummy all the time that you want to take your misery out on the people you care about most.

You know, maybe you ought to see a counsellor. Counsellors are full of good advice on becoming better at communicating and things like that.

I'm prone to having a wicked temper like my mum, but I've tried the whole meditating thing where you ground and centre yourself and tell yourself things (in your head) about how you are a peaceful person and desire harmony in your life and all that jazz. It's relaxing, and kind of defines a good starting point where you can say "I'm full of peace. My anger is gone. I'm not going to blow up any anyone. I am going to be a good listener. I am not going to be judgemental . . ." and so on and so forth. It sounds kind of corny, but it really does help you develop a constant awareness of your actions.

Answer 3

It's sounds like beyond the obvious problem of kids having kids, you need to learn about anger management. You will never be successful as a husband or father until you can control your anger. You could seek professional help, or just google anger management and read up on the subject. Sometimes just a simple awareness of your problem and some little-known but obvious truths can make all the difference in the world. Try to learn where your anger comes from and how to react. Google anger management.

Answer 4

Both of you are obviously way to young and immature to be in such a serious relationship and with a baby on the way no less. I feel sorry for both of you and your child. You are going to be a dad soon, with dad responsibilities, meaning you are going to have to provide for your child and child's mother. This is going to require you to be mature, something you may be able to handle at this time. Not being able to control your temper is also a sign of immaturity. You may be able to have sex like a man, but you certainly are not acting like a man. Get your act together and stop acting like a little boy. You have some serious responsibilites about to be thrust onto you. Do the right thing and BE A MAN.

Answer 5

Get a job. You'll be paying child support very, very soon. If you have "a temper that gets out of control," you have no right being around a pregnant woman or a baby. Take responsibility for yourself - get help with the temper and get a job!

Answer 6

Talk it out. Since you realize that you have a problem with your temper, try to go to anger management classes. Have a mediator present if necessary. Taking a break may also be a possibility. Sometimes it helps, her emotions are running high since she's pregnant. Just talk, and try to curb your emotions, think before you act. Take care!

Answer 7

You might both be stressing over the impending birth of your child. Keep talking openly and honestly. If things don't improve, you could try seeing a counciler. Also, taking communications or child development classes together could help your relationship. Good luck.

Answer 8

First in a month you two will be tied together for live. You are a Father to that child. I would suggest that you work on friendship with each other. I you two are meant to be more, if will work itself out.

You can talk about adoption. I see adoption as a act of love.

Good luck with everything

Answer 9

if you really want it to work, maybe you should consider getting help for your temper through an anger management course or therapy. also couples counsling would be beneficial to the two of you. I also recomend parenting classes for both of you becuase you are so young.

Answer 10

you both need to step back and take some time. you are both going to be parents and in each others life for the rest of your lifes. the time you have apart can help you both to think about what is right. my ex husband and i did not get along for along time but we both relized we have a little one and we need to be nice for her. it will be alot better in the long run.