I am in big trouble, I seem to have lost myself in the marriage. I get so caught up in taking care of my husband that I have forgotten who I am. How do I begin to find me again? Am I doomed?
2007-01-19 06:11:35 · 14 answers · asked by Lovely Lady 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Hang out without him. Volunteer somewhere. Just keep your mind occupied elsewhere.
2007-01-19 06:14:48 · answer #1 · answered by Diamondbch 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
> I am in big trouble, I seem to have lost myself in the marriage.
This happens more often than you might think.
> I get so caught up in taking care of my husband that I have
> forgotten who I am.
You're not alone.
> How do I begin to find me again?
Read books, go out with friends. See a good counselor.
> Am I doomed?
Nah. You're fine. You've got good insight and rather than clammoring for a divorce, you're here asking this question. You sound okay to me. Just do some stuff for yourself and you'll be okay.
Good luck.
2007-01-19 07:13:00 · answer #2 · answered by DearAbby 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is never wrong to get lost in marriage, but it IS bad when you start loosing YOURSELF in the marriage. remember how you were before you two got married? you knew yourself very well because you had alone time. you knew who you were, what you wanted, how you felt about things. now you have to share everyday with the man you love and it does get exhausting when you have to share your thoughts and feelings with someone else. maybe your husband needs to be reminded that he must take care of you too. Tell him what you need from him. If you need some alone time, designate a certain time out of your week to have "me time" and remember to let your hubby know that you are not trying to have time away from HIM you are trying to have alone time for yourself. (try getting a hobby or find a girl-friend to go out to the movies with.)
2007-01-19 06:22:36 · answer #3 · answered by play hard 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No honey, you're not doomed, you're a woman! GOD carefully crafted us as companions for the men, that's why they lack the things we're good at & vice versa. If it's bothering you, spend some you time doing whatever makes you happy.
Forgot what makes you happy, because you're a new person who enjoys making her husband happy. Spend some time w/some girlfriends or cousins or mom or at the mall or call that friend you haven't talked to in a while!
You're all grown up now, so don't think of ot as you losing yourself, you just have to redefine who you are!
2007-01-19 06:18:52 · answer #4 · answered by Bryan's Wife 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't think some people are understanding your question. You feel like you are so busy keeping house and home, taking care of your husband and trying to make him happy at home, you don't have time for yourself anymore.
You need some "me" time. Once a week see a movie with a friend, do volunteer work, or set aside a day for a bubble bath, chocolate, and jazz!
2007-01-19 06:22:38 · answer #5 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My wife has done the same thing to me and it's annoying. Now I can't go to the store alone without being accused of meeting someone for a quickie. Hell, I'm never out of her sight for more than an hour. where are all these other women coming from????
Get out, make a friend or two and go do something with them once a week or so.
2007-01-19 06:15:35 · answer #6 · answered by oldsoftee2001 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You are not doomed. Buy new clothes.....Start dressing up a little more,Go to the gym.......and let him find you. Then when he does, take him away for a long weekend. Ask him where you are in his life. Tell him where he is in your life.
2007-01-19 06:24:41 · answer #7 · answered by BroHam 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try doing things just for you. Take a nice warm bath, read a great book, start a hobby, make the time about you and for you.
2007-01-19 08:00:21 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
your not doomed marriage is a partnership for starters i help my wife with everything we both work & both do things around the house you need to start training him it's a bit like training a dog work on it & u'll reep the rewards
2007-01-19 06:26:27 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Two words: marriage counseling.
Time to sort out and prioritize your needs, his needs and the needs to make this marriage work.
Don't try to do this alone or without his full help and support.
Good luck!
2007-01-19 06:15:56 · answer #10 · answered by docscholl 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
no not doomed. but you can never lose yourself. its just as an equal you to are lost.he needs to take of you for i change. or it can be a midlife crisis and you are doomed
2007-01-19 06:16:05 · answer #11 · answered by bcom925 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋