NOTE:I don't need you judging me because I know I'm too young but I don't like abortions and I have a strict grandmother and I can't even get out of the house to gt one in the first place.
AND INCASE YOU'RE WONDERING, MY BOYFRIEND IS 16 BUT YOU WOULD THINK HE'S AT LEAST 20 FROM THE WAY HE LOOKS AND ACTS...
WHAT DO I DO????
2007-01-19 05:26:56 · 35 answers · asked by Reesie 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
I wouldn't think he was 20 if he said something like that. That's something an immature guy would say.
Face the consequences. You had sex so if you have a baby then now you are a mother with a life that has changed forever.
Sounds to me like you should have chosen a different kind of person to have sex with.
2007-01-19 05:31:48 · answer #1 · answered by Lisa 4 · 4⤊ 2⤋
Well, here are your options.
* Abortion
* Have the kid and keep it
* Have the kid and put it up for adoption
You've said you don't like abortions, so that is out. Of the other two options, I think the best is to give the baby up for adoption. You are only fifteen, and not emotionally or financially ready to raise a child.
There are a lot of couples that cannot have children that will help pay for your maternity costs with the understanding that they will adopt the baby after it is born. This way you get to know exactly who will be adopting your baby. Over the course of your pregnancy you will get to know them and find out what kind of people they are. This will help to reassure you that your baby will be going to a good home.
When the baby is born, you will likely feel a very strong emotional attachment to the baby. Don't let this sway your choice in letting the baby be adopted. Also, make sure both you and the biological father sign the adoption papers saying that the baby is legally the child of the adoptive parents. This will preclude a lot of possible legal problems in the future.
If you decide to go this route, you have to make sure you stay healthy. I don't know whether you use any substances, but if you do, you have to stop. Staying clean is in everyone's best interest. You will be healthier, the baby will be healthier, and you will have a much better chance of being chosen by an adoptive couple.
Best of luck, and use a condom from now on.
2007-01-19 05:47:11 · answer #2 · answered by OMGWTFBBQ!!1 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
From Experience...First of all.. You are going to have to get out of the house at one point to get the pregnancy test. If you havent got the pregnancy test then, You don't know. If you do end up pregnant, I'm telling you from experience, b/c I am going through the SAME thing right now, Please tell your grandmother (I told my mom i was pregnant , I WAS NOT planning on telling her, and I felt sick to my stomach, and when I did, I had a huge wave of relief b/c she has been supportive of everything) YOU will feel better about any choice you make. Just remember, if you DO have a child, You will NEVER be able to focus soley on your llife ever again. Your entire life will be devoted to that child, and you will have a forever bond with this man , who says "he'll kill you if you keep it". He is obviously not responsible, nor are you at 15. I'm 21, and I dont consider myself responsible to raise a child if i could! It doens't matter how Old your boyfriend looks, the fact is I would say your too young to have a child, and if you Do give it up for adoption you will always wonder where the baby is, and maybe eventually meet him/her.. it may be very painful for you. I don't want to tell you what to do, b/c I have definintley had plenty of people telling me what to do in the past few weeks, Listen to your heart. Don't let some one force you to keep a child you can't support, if your young body can even carry it to full term. Well, I dont know. If you think you want to keep the child just to keep the boyfriend around... don't do it. Thats a bad reason.. I'm not saying thats what your doing, just incase. People do crazy things, we all do. If you want any more advice let me know, I am going through some crazy stuff too. :)
2007-01-19 16:31:24 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I read this and couldn't help but try to answer you. I would never attempt to judge you so please don't worry about that. Before you make a final decision, you first need to make sure that you are indeed pregnant. If you're not, then none of this really matters except that now you know your boyfriend wasn't worth the time because he wasn't going to stand by you anyway. What you need to do is way all of your options. I know that you said you don't like abortions. I don't either but I had one. Parenthood is not easy and it costs a lot of money. It is very stressful, even more so for someone who isn't ready and no matter what you may think, you are not ready. You have a whole life ahead of you and I wish you wouldn't ruin it because you made a bad decision. You are not the only one who will suffer - the baby will too and how fair is that. I just want you to really think about it. You could also consider adoption. There are many people who would love to have children and have the means but can not. Before you decide to have it, please take the time to think it over. You still have highschool to finish and college, so please think about how this will affect your life. What about prom and homecoming and all of the fun things your friends and ex-boyfriend will be doing that you can't do because you had to grow up too soon. Just some things to think about. If you do decide to abort, make sure the ex-boyfriend goes along with you too so that he can see what all you had to go through. He needs to be affected to. If you want to talk further about it, you can e-mail me at the address shown.
2007-01-19 05:56:04 · answer #4 · answered by MoochasSmoochas 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
get a home test i think most drug stores have them out so you can just pick it up and pay for it. then take it if it comes back + you could always talk to a counselor at your school they may be able to have your grandmother sit with them why you tell her . if you are scared to do either of theses things then i believe in most states planned parent hood might be able to give you the test for free and they might have another road to take
we all get into situation we can't get out of
and i would not worry to much on your ex boyfriend if you believe that his threat is true and not spoken out of upsetment then i would stay away from him and let your grandmother deal with him and his family you know there is always adoption you could have an open one where you could get pictures and updates on the child and some even let the mother still have a part in the child's life
good luck
and hey if nothing else it is a false alarm
just try to be more careful when having sex.
even adults make the mistake of not using a form of birth control. don't let other peoples reaction be a imprint of who you are everyone has opoin and when going on here you risk having people be a little harsh i think it comes down to a baby is a high responsibility . and you are so young but i hope it all works out for you
2007-01-19 05:47:36 · answer #5 · answered by ~*big mama *~ 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
wildbren and carrot WHAT THE F*** IS WRONG WITH YOU! Geeze there are some truly horrible people in this world! Being young and pregnant is a scary thing! Even more scary are the people like you 2 in this world who obviously got some major problems of their own. Girl im gonna tell you right now, don't worry about others judging you because one day they will be judged (by the only judge who really matters)!! So yeah you probably better tell granny or someone who can help and that you trust because no matter how mad she may be at first, if she loves you (wich im sure she does) she will help you and guide you! And if you beleive in God you could pray about it, prayer is the best way. God will give you the courage and strength you need. Trust him
2007-01-19 06:23:17 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh Honey, I had my first child when was 16yrs. It was hard and even harder facing up to my actions. But all will work out in the end. I now have a 8yrs old and great husband (not the father). So talk to your grand mother let her know you made a mistake ASK FOR HELP! If nothing else talk to your counseler at school. They can arrange for a pregancy test. If you are..tell the counseler what the boyfriend said. I understand your BF maybe mad at the situation but as they say it takes two to tango!! That is not someone you need to be with. If you are infact not pregnant. Learn from this scare to atleast take better precautions if not abstain from sex altogether. I hope and wish you the best!!
2007-01-19 05:41:01 · answer #7 · answered by Meggan 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The first thing to do is find out if you really are pregnant.
Abortion: There are two main reasons why abortion has been frowned upon: religion and health. In many religions abortion has been considered wrong because the life was planned by the higher power. Religions also frowned upon abortion because it meant less followers meaning the religion wouldn't spread as far and as fast. Not to mention many religions have been persecuted for their beliefs (Christianity, Judaism, etc.) so having more people meant they could have more people stand with them against their persecuted.
In reality abortion has been around for most of human existence. It wasn't until recently that medical practices became sterile and safe. In the 1800's abortions were starting to banned in order to protect women's health.
In the united states over a third of women have an abortion before they are 45, so you're not alone. If you are thinking about abortion and not just throwing around the word then I suggest checking out Planned Parenthood and going to their website.
Summary: Abortions have been frowned upon but are not uncommon. Women now run little risk of health problems relating abortion.
Advise: Don't use abortion as a means of birth control. When this is over go get the depo shot.
2007-01-19 05:58:06 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Well hon, I feel for you...but the fact of the matter is, you have to face the music. Strict grandparents or not, you have to tell them. There is no other way out, unless you have another adult in your family that can help you. Don't worry about your boyfriend, that is a typical response for an immature 16 year old. Think about yourself and what you have to do. If I were you I'd do it quickly before time starts running past you. The sooner you act, the better.
2007-01-19 05:40:45 · answer #9 · answered by earthstarlatin 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sweetie, anyone here who judges you needs to take a good look in the mirror and ask if they've ever made any mistakes in life!
First, PLEASE tell your grandmother, or any other adult that you can trust, and get yourself a pregnancy test and confirm this so that you know for sure. You seriously need the help of an adult on this!!!! PLEASE trust me on that. We do not want to hear about you on the evening news! Your boyfriend has no right to abuse you in this manner...yes the way he speaks to you is abuse. Get an adult involved NOW before he does something stupid or horrific. He is very immature and sounds dangerous too.
I also found myself pregnant at 17. My parents were also strict and said if I ever got pregnant, they would disown me. Therefore, I kept it hidden until I couldn't anymore. They broke down in tears and asked why I had not come to them sooner. I reminded them that they said they would disown me and kick me out of the house. They were so sorry that they ever said that. I'm sure that your grandmother would forgive you and help you. If she is not willing, then seek the advice of your counselor at school, or go into an emergency room and tell them EVERYTHING that is going on. The nurses and doctors are obligated to inform the police that your boyfriend threatened to kill you. Do not let this scare you! You need the help and the ER will give you a pregnancy test, and also the police will help you out and keep your boyfriend away from you! Remember that if you are pregnant, that he would also be killing your unborn child. I know you do not want any harm to come to yourself or your baby.
Please e-mail me at jb3boys@yahoo.com and follow up with me. I am very worried about you and will say prayers that everything turns out OK. Please know that there ARE people out there in the world who truly care about the welfare of others!
2007-01-19 05:39:37 · answer #10 · answered by PrincessOfFun35 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
First of all.... you are right you are young!!! I'm even young to have a child, 18. I'm 9 weeks pregnant. If he threatened you or the unborn child. GO TO THE POLICE STATION AND MAKE A REPORT. Don't sit here and think it's nothing serious. Even if he was not going to do it, he still said it. You might still love him BUT you need to get a restaining order on him asap. I got sexual abused by a neighbor when I was 14. He was 15. I went straight to the cops, and got a restraining order on him. He didn't ever touch me again and he got what he deserved. He is not mature or acts 20. Otherwise he wouldn't have said he would kill you. Please for the sake of yourself and the unborn child go to the police. Good luck, and be safe.
2007-01-19 05:43:54 · answer #11 · answered by Trying to conceive 08 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋