Will the court see him for what he is?

Question

My husband left me after a 21 years marriage for another woman. I have had medical problems for the last three years and have been on and off of work. Since he has left he has offered to pay nothing to help me out. We own a home he's made no attempt on house payments, no bills, nothing. I have a hearing in a few weeks for Temporary Relief while our divorce is pending, will the judge see him for what he really is? I have been to therapy and was diagnosed as Severely Depressed. Anyone with advice will help me out. Thank you.

Answer 1

Probably not. Courts never seem to reward people the woman feels is enough but you should at least get some kind of help.

Answer 2

In most states there should be something on the books about your mutual duty to preserve community assets. So in this regard, he should be paying the insurance and making the mortgage payment. If those things don't happen, the community asset would be in jeopardy and that's not cool.

In most states, you're not supposed to unilaterally sell anything or otherwise dispose of any assets until it all works through the distribution of assets. You might be able to pursue something from the preservation of assets angle.

Either way, you need a good attorney. I am not an attorney and this is not legal advice, just a guess. Talk to an attorney and see if my idea has any merit.

I feel bad for you, it sounds like you're in a really tough spot. Keep up with the therapy and maybe consider a personal coach. Exercise can be really helpful with depression. The personal coach angle is more than just working on your physical side. You also need somebody to announce your goals to and who can help you to understand what is in the way of your accomplishing those goals.

Good luck.

Answer 3

Sorry
But I'm more than likely gonna shoot myself here,but could you tell me.
Who, was the highest earner throughout the marriage?
Who, payed the most of everything?
Have you brought up Children?
Did you stay at home while he earned and YOU supported his career?
Was this a one off or was this a regular thing?
Was he abusive in any way?
I think, without this info you can't make a judgement or answer your question.
I am sorry you have Medical problems but was this down to him ?
If the answer to all of these questions is yes then Hell yes
Of coarse the judge will see through him,and i hope you get everything you deserve and more.

Answer 4

I sure hope so for your sake . Take all the paper work to court the ones where you have been paying for the house and anything else you are paying for as well . I would let everyone know who this other woman is and make a spectacle of her in her own neighborhood (my sister did that ) . She had to move cause all her neighbors were calling her names and leaving msgs on her car like homewrecker . Why are you severly depressed ? you did not walk away he did . You have nothing to be depressed about . Get up on your feet and hold your head up . It was terrible what he did . Have you ever thought about suing her for allienation of affection ? It has been done in my state and in N. Carolina and the lady won her case to the tune of a million dollars and it is something to consider . You hold your head up high honey there is nothing you did wrong . he is a rat . I hope he gets what is coming to him . Good luck to you honey.

Answer 5

Dear Lisa,

If you have not presented the facts you have outlined here in your court petition, the judge has no way of knowing what is going on. He/She does not read minds and definitely has no time to do investigations on all of the divorces she/he hears.

So, talk to your attorney about what and how the facts will be presented in court. It is your attorney's job to inform the court of what you feel makes your situation special. Make an appointment and sit down and ask.

Good luck, hon. You can get through this... and life DOES get better!!

Answer 6

Just keep plugging away and reminding him about his own responsibilities. If you have lawyer to point out to the judge certain things, good, but if not, don't forget to tell the judge if you know he won't do it.
I have an ex of 4 years. I had to stick on him about child support. He almost got jailed, but he is paying now. I'm sorry to hear about you condition. These things are hard to do. Just keep remembering he'll get his fate at the end. Just start making you life better and his worse. It is amazing what exercise does for attitudes.

Answer 7

I'm sorry for your situation. The court will only do what's fair according to the law. Most likely, the judge will order that he pay something toward the house payments if he expects to gain any benefit from its sale, but as far as bills, I doubt it. There is really no such thing as alimony anymore, and what there is is very very difficult to get. I hope that you have legal counsel. The judge may feel bad for you too, but he must act within the law.

Answer 8

Make notes of everything that happens between you and your ex. Get legal advice if necessary. Having written notes will be an advantage (you will sound more positive when you speak to the legal people).They don't like people sounding vague,they need facts to work with not garbled indefinite stories. Good luck and take him for every thing you can cos he will try to do the same to you.

Answer 9

depends on the judge, and if they are sympathetic, since u do have these health issues, he may be ordered to pay. no wonder u are so severely depressed my dear. the judge may see him for what he is, do u have a good attorney to handle things? can't see u leaving this marriage empty handed really. i do believe judges take all this into consideration and judge accordingly, he might be able to fool some people but don't think he can fool a judge.

Answer 10

You should get interim support until the divorce judgement is in. Make sure to forward to your lawyer any and all medical documentation regarding your conditions and also make sure you have an up-to-date financial expenses filled out, regarding all your expenses and income, insurance, debts etc. You need to have evidence, documents and medical statements in order to make your case before the hearing, the more prepared you are the more you will receive in the end.

Answer 11

The court will deal with it best they can.It wont make any difference whether you are depressed or not,dont think they will award you maintenence from him unless there are children under 16 years old. You will probably have to sell up and move somewhere that you can afford to pay for.Sorry, only being practical!