My friend lied to me about setting me up with this guy she knew from home. She posed as him for almost four years and I believed her. Finally, I confronted her on it and she told the truth. She has post traumatic stress syndrome and it comes from that. She isn't gay or bi. I am so hurt though that I don't know what to do. I don't want to walk out on her life. How should I handle this? I don't trust what she says to me, but I want answers. Where do I go from here?
2007-01-18 19:16:19 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Social Science ➔ Psychology
Forgive and keep your emotional
distance. Don't forget, because
it might be that she likes playing
games. You are right not to trust her,
did you ever think what she might
be portraying you as behind your
back?? I know it's hard, but make new friends. Join a club, take a night
course, or join a gym.
2007-01-18 19:33:13 · answer #1 · answered by V B 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
well, first and foremost, you consider her your friend right?
well, if you do, then you should learn to forgive and forget. sure, she made a TOTALLY MAJOR slip up that serves as an embarrassment on both parts (especially yours). however, she must have a reason. try asking her as casually as possible. don't let your emotions get the better of you. try to "break it to her gently". she seems to be in a delicate state.
when she gives you her reasons, try to understand the situation from her point of view. put yourself in her shoes. however, it's up to you to consider if her reason is valid/reasonable enough. if you think that the situation is reconcilable, then perhaps it is. sometimes even the seemingly big slip-ups are just speed bumps that could eventually make your friendship stronger. however, if you really feel that it's the end of the line, well, you know best. try to break it off gently - don't pin all the blame on her all at once.
well, the best thing to do i guess is to find out why she did it that to you and give yourself and your friend time to weigh your options and evaluate the situation at hand. if the friendship is real, it may not be worth risking.
if it really is the final straw, well, you got memories to cherish. still, that doesn't mean that you should make enemies of each other. remember, at some point, you were friends. so, you could probably maintain a good relationship of consideration, though not as close as before.
2007-01-18 21:45:48 · answer #2 · answered by changing_sky 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Two children at age 20 and a potentially dishonest husband? Whether she's mendacity or no longer, you are going to need to scan that infant to make certain. Then a technique or yet another you are going to need to make your husband fully grasp that you're going to not tolerate having to wonder whether he is making extra toddlers all over the place God's production. If this youngster isn't his, insist that he lose all touch with this lady and inform her under no circumstances to name or hassle you in any respect. Block her emails, texts, calls, and so forth. If that youngster IS his, you've got bought issues. Good success.
2016-09-07 21:27:29 · answer #3 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Of course you feel as if you can not trust your friend anymore. And of course you want to know why. But think about this. Would the answers that you got from her really be what you wanted? Would you believe her explanations anyway? How does having PTSD account for her doing this to you? I have PTSD and I would never consider doing this. That explanation from you was confusing to me. As far as remaining friends, I think she needs to seek help. And I would want to know for sure that she had done it. I would also insist on a heart felt apology.
2007-01-18 19:31:42 · answer #4 · answered by Diana P 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She deceived you for four years, and you still call her a friend. I can understand a few hours as a joke, but four years? I think you already know what you want to do.
2007-01-18 19:34:14 · answer #5 · answered by D.B. Cooper 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like a mixture of alot of things going on with your friend, dear.....especially the need for attention.....but lying to someone to get attention is simply wrong.....I would talk to her once more about it...tell her it wasn't right....then ask for an apology....hope this helps...
2007-01-18 19:38:55 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Her behavior is not related to PTSD. It sounds like she just liked the attention.
2007-01-18 19:20:13 · answer #7 · answered by nursesr4evr 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
she sounds very weird. like a pathological liar. why do u need a friend on who u can't rely? and she played a very very dirty trick on u. i wouldn't forgive her.
2007-01-18 19:24:28 · answer #8 · answered by jacky 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
With friends like that, you don't need enemies.
2007-01-18 20:24:31 · answer #9 · answered by orderly logic 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
forgive, do not forget...maybe keeping your distance for a while will help...
2007-01-18 20:12:58 · answer #10 · answered by ladysarah 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋