My boyfriend is in a gang and he's very abusive,possive,stalks me and crazy.I want out his relationship but i don't know how. He told me that if i left him he would kill me or he would get someone eles to do it. what should i do? I tried the police.
2007-01-18 19:01:24 · 22 answers · asked by Sonta 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I am so sorry your going through all this pain,
I have one just like that, only difference, no gang, jus him.
Have you tried talking to family? for help.
Well, I am sure there is a domestic violence unit in your area, He does not have to physically reside with you to be considered a domestic situation. I would call the abuse hot line, they are very confidential about these matters.
Hun, for now I suggest keeping records of events which will assist you later. I mean the things we don't like to remember at times.
I know it is hard and scary all at the same time, however, you have taking the initial step to remove yourself from an unhealthy relationship.
I want you to know that your not alone and that this is all about his need to control. You are a good person and that's pretty much what attracts these types of abuser's.
Please call the National Hotline for Abuse.
They are caring and understand all the emotions, fears, frustration.
Be discreet and sweetheart, at times like this, choose your friends wisely.
email me: if you need to vent or just clear your head when the heat is on......
2007-01-18 19:22:16 · answer #1 · answered by annalani64 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Seek a women's crisis center in your home town, if you can't seem to find one go to your local human services office or sometimes a public library, and ask for guidance. If the police did not do anything but, lock him up for a couple of hours my advice to you is locate your district attorney's office and file for a protective order, if your are in evident danger they will help you relocate to a safer dwelling. If you have made up your mind of leaving this destructive relationship, stick to it. Most of abusers believe they are not the problem, and will continue this behavior until something fatal and irreversible happens. Seek counseling from a trusted family member or join a ministry, being close to God makes you see the path you should take much clearer. Good luck and may God bless you.
2007-01-18 19:30:32 · answer #2 · answered by Yesi20 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
GO to a transition house/shelter. Call the Crisis LINE. You have to get out of there. If you feel like you are in immediate danger. Kill is MURDER you know that right? I wouldn't go to your parents or family members, caz he may come after you there and harm your friends and family. CALL the Police, GO to the station. Tell them that he had threatened you and that you need a safe place to go to. Get a restraining order from court. get a lawyer, if you can't afford one get on legal aid. Transition houses help you with this. TRUST ME..I have been there done that.
2007-01-18 19:11:34 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
could the police not help you?if you have family in another state that would be willing to let you stay with them that might be the way to go for a while and try to get your life on the right track.life can be so much better than gangs and life and death all the time.please be good to yourdelf and hope all turns out well for you.good luck
2007-01-18 22:16:48 · answer #4 · answered by angel_ns_texas 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
restraining orders do no good. They are just a piece of paper. The best thing would to move out of state for a little while, maybe forever. Its just not worth your life. The police are no good unless you have one right next to you all the time. Move away but dont tell your friends for a little while because he may triy to get info from them. Good luck!
2007-01-18 20:28:10 · answer #5 · answered by I hate stupid ppl like you 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
hi, he is not a friend or a lover if he cant look after your needs and if he loves u he wont be abusive. you must be good looking for him to keep you as a status symbol. what did the police do and can you go away somewhere to restart your life . because staying back with him will only bring you misery nad you need to go away. get your family to help out and tell them everything. you cant deal with this alone . wish you all the best.
2007-01-18 19:10:20 · answer #6 · answered by hrnycuk 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
my sister is almost in the same situation. And, if you call the cops one to many times, they stop taking you serious. But, they need to. you need to get a restraining order out on him, turn him into the police and fast. They have to help you. Maybe, you can video record him threatning you? turn that in.
2007-01-18 20:16:43 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh! this is hard and my heart is breaking for you,if he is my boyfriend I will use feminine force to him,(men can sense your fear,anger,doubt,desperation.) I will be strong ,calm. quite ,I will not contradict him.I will love and care for him, until he become submissive. Secretly, I will plan my escape where He can't find me. This is not an advice, This is me if I have a bf like yours. Good Luck, God Bless You.
2007-01-18 19:26:17 · answer #8 · answered by Vannili 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You went to the police and your still alive? How did it not get back to him that you went to the cops? You need to make like a banana and split. Call the cops after your next beating they will throw his monkey *** in jail then split. Not much he can do in jail. Next time he beats you ****** WASTE HIS ***** *** its called self-defense. I’m not saying that you should kill him just catch him off guard and **** HIM UP. Put his ***** *** in a wheel chair.
2007-01-18 19:12:25 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Run!!! just go to a shelter. If he doesn't know much about your family, go there. Go out of state, change jobs, tell no one your business. Cut off all people who know him. Tell no one your number or address. Keep your mouth shut and RUN. Now! before you wind up pregnant. GET OUT NOW.
2007-01-18 19:15:43 · answer #10 · answered by Tellin' U Da Truth! 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋