i live in NC, my husband and his parents (consists of dad and grandmother - no mother-) live in VA....can i divorce my husband and make sure that his family has nothing to do with my son? they aren't physically or sexually abusive, but they are smokers, gamblers, and drinkers, and liars, and neglectful, & verbally abusive---the dad has been dating a married woman for years now. the grandmother is 88, but still drives even though her eyesight is failing and is mentally incompantant...she repeats herself every 5 minutes...i'm afraid she'd forget about my 16 month old son being there if she was left to watch him. she has only seen him about 4 times, but has to be constanly reminded of my son's name.
2007-01-18 15:11:52 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
i really don't want my husband to have any type of custody either..will judge award me full custody based on the fact that my husband only comes home on sundays, doesn't know my son'd schedule, and had left him in apoopy diaper all day when i left him home with him one day while i went on a job interveiw.
2007-01-18 15:13:19 · update #1
Ok, first on the custody issue. If the parents are in different states you can't really "share" physical custody. One will have full physical custody (that is who the child lives with and who makes the day to day decisions) and the parents will most likely share legal custody (meaning you have to consult with each other on majory decisions). The parent without custody will get visitation or parenting time. All the reasons you mentioned basically show you have been the "primary parent" and barring something quite bad against you, you will probably be awarded full physcial custody of your son - especially given how young he is.
Regarding restrictions on visitation. You can try to get language in your judgment regarding prohibitions on having the baby around smoke or left alone with the elderly great-grandmother. You should really have restrictions on the child not being driven by great-grandmother. I think those are all very reasonable and any judge would understand the dangers. However, you need to get away from the "make sure his family has nothing to do with my son" mentality and towards a "how can I make it safe for our son to spend time with his grandparents and family." A judge will be much more inclined to listen to you if you have the second mentality.
It might sound unfair but most judges will start to lean against you if you bring up things like who the grandfather is dating, the repeating of what the great-granmother says. It makes you sound petty and simply out to hurt your ex and his family. What you want to sound like is a reasonable mother with reasonable concerns about the safety of her son.
Good luck.
2007-01-18 15:26:40 · answer #1 · answered by CV 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I understand your concerns. However, the Courts will not deny your husband visitation with you son unless he is a threat to your child. I would suggest speaking to your attorney about these matters. Sometimes, the courts will order "supervised" visitation if the child's best interest is at stake. Unless your husband is a criminal, or a wife or child beater, he probably won't have this.
I know it's hard and you worry about your child. I hope it all works out in your favor and in the best interest of the child.
2007-01-18 23:32:12 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to address these matters with an attorney. Make sure you tell the attorney everything and more, if you have it. He will address the judge with these matters.
Good Luck and God be with you.
2007-01-18 23:18:43 · answer #3 · answered by Samantha 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Best thing to do is consult an attorney. Most will do a fist time wihtout a fee and see what they say.
2007-01-18 23:16:47 · answer #4 · answered by blackwidow849 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you're husband is a good father and loves his son he won't leave him alone with his family.
Even though you didn't make it as a couple....talk to your husband about your concerns.
2007-01-18 23:45:18 · answer #5 · answered by daljack -a girl 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
LEGALLY YOU CAN'T STOP THE FATHER OR FAMILY FROM SEEING HIS LEGAL SON !!!!!!!!In the end you will end up hurting the boy as he has a choice in this when he gets older &end up hating you in the end for not letting him see his own father.
2007-01-18 23:21:54 · answer #6 · answered by Spanky the monkey !!! 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Sorry, but I don't think you can do anything about it, unless you can prove them unfit
2007-01-18 23:28:13 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋