Mother in-law staying at your house for a month after baby is born.?

Question

How would you feel if your partners mother stayed at your house for a month just after the baby was born.

My brothers partner's mother is staying with them for the first month they have the baby at home to help out.

My brothers partner would only be at home by herself while my brother is at work, even then he works less than 5 minutes away.

I feel it should be something shared between a couple and not have someone telling you how to raise your kid.

How would you feel about this happening.

Answer 1

Maybe a day or two so you get your barrings and can rest. My mother in law stayed for a day over and came over for the first days pretty often and you get sick of it. They get in the way sort of and you need to learn to raise the baby alone sooner or later. I say a day or so until you get settled and that is all.

Answer 2

My mother stayed with us for six weeks after my baby was born. It was my first, and I would not have survived without her here. Even something as simple as taking a shower in the morning wouldn't have been possible. Not to mention being able to sleep in the morning after a rough night of crying and feedings, and all the good food I got to eat. Also, having a new baby in the house is a really tough transition when you're used to life with just your husband, so having mom around meant I could grab a quick dessert or even just pick up a few things at the store with him, like old times. And like some of the other answerers, I had a c-section so I wouldn't have been able to do many things by myself in the early weeks.

So it really depends on how you see the situation. If you see them as an intrusion, then of course you won't be able to take it. If you're grateful that someone loves you enough to give up a month of their life to make your life easier, then you will see it differently.

Btw--my husband loved having my mom with us.

Answer 3

Well when I had my first two, my dad's sister came to say with us for a couple weeks and Thank God for her!! I can't tell you how much I appreciated the help she gave us. It was wonderful to be able to have those first few weeks with my new baby to just enjoy him without worrying about laundry, cooking, cleaning.. etc.
With my last one, we live to far away now and my MIL and her mother came over and brought a home cooked dinner and that was enough. If she was to stay with me for a month, no matter how helpful, we'd kill each other.
I think it depends on the mother, if she doesn't feel like she can handle it then by all means let someone come to help her out.

Answer 4

deep-blue looks like you have never had a baby. I would of loved to have had my mom or mother-in-law at my home after I had my son. It was pure hell. You don't get enough sleep. I had a caesarean and it was rough for me to move around much less deal with a baby. Don't get me wrong, I was happy to have my son but I needed much help. a month is really great. I hope these people aren't selfish. Just think when they become grandparents and they think the way they do now. I am sure they will want to be a part of their child's life then.....

Answer 5

Well my mother stayed with us the first few days home, but left after my husband got home. It was nice she cleaned & cooked so I got to get a ton of much needed rest, and with our second it was amazing since she kept my daughter busy while I slept & showered. But a month seems like way to long, a week would be too long for me! And I could only do days, I like to have the evening to my family,kwim?

Answer 6

my grandmother plans on staying with me and my husband for a month after i have my baby. with the closest family living almost 2 hours away i am completely fine with it. since she raised me i am fine with telling her whatever is on my mind and i know she will still love me with no backlash.

it really is not your place to say much about this. and if your brother has anything against it he should voice up and atleast try to make some compromises with his partner. if this is her first she may need somebody around to comfort and reassure her that she trust. especially somebody who has gone through the birthing experience.

Answer 7

My grandma dropped by 4 or 5 times the first week, and about once a week after that to do laundry and dishes which was awesome. But no I wouldn't want anyone living with me, particularly my MIL ... or my mom for that matter. My grandma doesn't nag me unlike some people.

Answer 8

I was expecting that my Mother would stay with us for a bit but my husband told me, He is taking a month off and wants us to be alone with the baby.. I think its crazy!!! I dono either way I feel freaked out..

Answer 9

It really depends on how much help you need and what your relationship is like with your MIL. Personally I'd prefer my blood-kin over my inlaws, but that may not be the case here. New moms definitely need someone to help them, be it their husband or someone else. I overdid myself after my c-section with my first child, and I don't plan to do that this time. You just have to treat this situations gracefully, though; if someone is willing to help you, you don't need to hurt their feelings, but you need your own privacy as well.

Answer 10

I *WISH* I had someone staying here to help me!! I just gave birth a few days ago and nobody has come by to help and we are tired and have to eat fast food and the house is a wreck!

I say to realize when you are getting a GOOD thing.