When I became pregnant, my boyfriend started acting weird. I found it difficult to get hold of him at times and it took a day or two for him to even text me back. This caused a lot of arguements. The physical and affectionate side of the relationship was fine until around November time, then he seemed distant and didnt seem to want to be around me. I put it down to being afraid of what was happening. Even after several talks, things didnt improve and we decided to take a break. That was the 10th Dec. I went to hospital with preeclampsia the next day and stayed until I was induced and gave birth 23rd Dec., a month early. He knew I was in hospital and did not visit until I had our daughter. He seemed in a better mood and even started being affectionate again. We had sex recently and ever since he won't even hug me, and hes started to become distant again. He says he doesnt know if he wants us to get back together. What should I do? He says he still loves me, but I need to be shown it.
2007-01-18 12:07:22 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
honey he needs to prove himself to u. its prob the case of just bein mixed up but its not fair on u x
2007-01-18 12:10:13 · answer #1 · answered by missbp1982 2 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Congratulations on the birth of your baby. You need to start looking out for her and for yourself. The baby's father has a Peter Pan complex. Having a child scares many men because it means they have to grow up. They can't handle the responsibility, so they use any excuse to bolt. If he truly loves you and the baby that he fathered, he would step up and shoulder his responsibilities. Shame on him! Make sure you get the child support and anything else, to which you're entitled depending on where you reside.
Your hormones may cause you to be on an emotional roller coaster, making everything worse. That's not easy. Get help from your doctor if it's extreme. Let your family and friends be your support group as you move forward. It's no wonder that you had to be hospitalized with high blood pressure the day after he walked out.
2007-01-18 13:13:46 · answer #2 · answered by Loki 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Guys can become very weird when their wife or girlfriend becomes pregnant. They are up and down in emotions. One minute they want to be there for you and the next minute they forget. Do not feel like you have to put up with foolishness for the baby's sake because you deserve to be happy.
The only thing I can suggest is live your life. Do not expect anything from him. You have to have a whatever attitude. If not you will go insane and the baby does not need to lose her mother to the mental institution. So sweetie word from the wise.
Live your life, Do what makes you happy and don't expect anything from him. You'll be fine if he's there for you and you'll be even better if he isn't.
2007-01-18 12:41:22 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
congrats on the babe - but now the babe is here you need to get to grips with your fellow and get things sorted, you will probably be a little emotional for a while (more than normal maybe) as you have just gone through a pregnancy labour and the stresses of being a new mum. Dont let your fellow mess you around hes either in or out, you need to get on with your life without any added complications of him now that he babe is here which is gonna take alot of your time. Speak to your bloke and get things sorted once and for all and dont let him use you like a toy he can chuck back in the cupboard and get out when he is bored (as is sounds like he is doing) good luck
2007-01-18 12:25:45 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
i think he's just had a major shock with the baby an doesnt kno wots goin thru his head rite now. its messed his head up but he dnt realise how much he's messin ur head up.
u need 2 sit an talk 2 him. ask him if he wants 2 be wi u an bring the baby up as a family. if he dnt then try 2 stay rational an come up with a plan of how ur gonna bring this baby up in the best possible way.
2007-01-18 21:26:52 · answer #5 · answered by debs 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
PREGNACY WILL BRING THE WORSE IN A MAN (NOT ALL MEN).
SOUNDS LIKE HE GOT AFRAID OF YOU BEING A MOM. AND THE RESPONSABILITY THAT COMES AFTERWARDS IS NOT AN EASY ONE. HE RAN FROM THE RESPONSIBILITY OF BEING A DAD AND NOW HE WANTS NOTHING TO DO WITH YOU.
YOU SHOULD LET HIM KNOW HE NEEDS TO PAY CHILD SUPPORT IF HE IS NOT GOING TO BE PART OF YOUR NEW FAMILY.
WOW YOU WERE SICK IN THE HOSPITAL AND HE COULDNT BRING HIM SELF TO GO VISIT YOU?
YES I AGREE YOU NEED TO BE SHOWN THAT HE IS CAPABLE TO COMMIT TO THIS RELATIONSHIP. WORDS ARE NOT EVERYTHING. HE CAN TELL YOU HE LOVES YOU BUT WITH ACTIONS HE IS LETTING YOU KNOW HE DOES NOT WANT TO BE PART OF YOU AND THE BABY.
I HOPE YOU AND UR DAUGHTER ARE DOING OK. IF HE WILL NOT COMMIT TO YOU AND UR BABY THEN HE MUST PAY CHILD SUPPORT.
2007-01-18 12:27:26 · answer #6 · answered by ââ¢Â¥*~áƦ~NYSunrise~áƦ~*ââ¢Â¥ 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you're having to ask this question then I think you already know the answer is no. Enjoy your daughter, love her and be there for each other, (you don't need someone like him involved)and eventually the love you deserve will find you .
Blessed be x
2007-01-18 12:29:34 · answer #7 · answered by serephina 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hmmmm, for the sake of your child try to remain cordial no matter what.
For his sake (sanity) try not to be too needy, especially emotionally needy. Sometimes this scares men off, no matter what their age is..
For your sake, politely raise your standards, evaluate and announce your needs and expectations, then quietly start looking to move on with your life.
Do not expect an immediate turn-around from him. At the least he'll be there to help with the raising of the child.
2007-01-18 12:18:31 · answer #8 · answered by yorlooksmybiz 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Dont let ur emotions after having this baby blind you.... I just had a baby 2 and that **** is hard in its self u dont need that extra stress but try to figure out whats going on wit him 1st, he might not be ready for all that responsibility... but he needs to get it together for ur daughter
2007-01-18 13:52:14 · answer #9 · answered by MzSyn 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
he's a coward...make him face up to his responsibilities...if he continues this little charade...dump him for good and take care of your baby on your own...your strong enough....don't put up with it...lay it on the table and tell him if he does not buck his ideas up then he's to walk and keep walking....don't have him ruin yours and your babies life coz he's (NOT SURE) if he wants a relationship..he either does or he doesn't....tell him to get a grip or get the hell out of your life....there's a baby involved here.... a baby is for life...boyfriends aren't, don't have him mess you about like that...if he is sitting on his bum going (oooh i am not sure) give him 48 hours to make his mind up...if he hasn't then dump him, and get on with your life without him, he's obviously doesn't care anyway, just go it alone and forget him...don't waste time waiting for him to make his mind up....just get on with it...you can do it, if you have a supportive family then you will not have to cope alone...this guy wants his cake and eat it but he does not want to do the doting dad part....
2007-01-18 14:45:14 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Make sure the law knows he is indeed the father and make him pay child siupport as per the law, plus maintanance for you.
He is a loser! A huge baby, immature and disgusting.
2007-01-18 12:12:11 · answer #11 · answered by Legandivori 7 · 4⤊ 0⤋