I feel bad because I pulled out of Grad. school so he'll probably see me as a failure even though I pulled out because I decided It wasn't for me!!! He is always trying to put himself up at my expense. Thing is...he is a doctor and is 10 years older than me....so I just don't get this? He is so quick to judge and Label! He will put everyone down! Why can't he just be happy for me?
2007-01-18 11:16:38 · 5 answers · asked by Rachel T. 2 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
Now I'm back to school doing something I truly love!!!
2007-01-18 11:23:31 · update #1
Listen to me, Rachel. You live your life the way you want to and let your cousin live his the way he wants. He cannot make you happy. You can. If you are happy, you are successful. But if you choose to live your life by his, or anyone elses standards other than your own, I can almost guarantee that you will NEVER be happy. I wish you the best of everything in life.
2007-01-18 11:34:16 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
First of all, ignore it! What he's thriving on is your response. If he doesn't get it, he'll no longer be able to thrive, and he'll quit.
Second, try to understand that he's acting this way because inside, HE is unhappy. There's something wrong with HIM that he needs to fix, but he probably doesn't even realize it, except to know that putting others down makes him feel "better". Truly happy people are happy for the ones they love.
If you really feel the need to try to make him stop, do it when there's only you & him around, and make it EXCEEDINGLY clear what you expect from him. Tell him you don't treat him that way, and that it's not appropriate for him to do so to you...Tell him that you expect him to speak to you in a respectful manner at all times...Tell him that what success means to you may not be what it means to him, and that he needs to back off.
Good luck!
2007-01-18 19:29:42 · answer #2 · answered by abfabmom1 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Cut him off and focus on yourself. You sound like you might be a sensitive/empathetic person who might be easily affected by the negativity (or positivity for that matter) of others... Meanwhile, those who big themselves up at the expense of others probably sense that they can suck the positive from you, thus making themselves feel better... don't let him get to you. Remove yourself from his negative influence.
2007-01-18 19:27:48 · answer #3 · answered by menina0908 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You said yourself he puts everyone down, he needs to put others down to make himself feel better. Don't worry about it, I'm sure on the inside he truly is happy for you.
2007-01-18 19:20:44 · answer #4 · answered by Joshua D 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Get rid of the toxin in your life and go back to school for your own sake.
2007-01-18 19:22:40 · answer #5 · answered by ♨ Wisper ► 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋