I come from a dif. culture than american, where virginity is sacred and you should only lose it with the person you are gonna marry. (esp. for girls) So ok i married and american girl who wasnt a virgin (i loved her so much i didnt care) and we moved to where i am from. We love each other, and things are going well for us... she knows that i have always been hurted and bothered cuz she wasnt a virgin anymore but i tried to never make a big deal out of it.
Recently, she lied to me about something very stupid... money. i didnt care at all about this but for some reason this lie brought back all the hurting feelings abour her not being a virgin i thought i've lost forever. its insane, i cant stop thinking about it and the idea of my marriage being a mistake is growing exponencially. Obviously she cant do anything about it.
What do you recommend me to do?
2007-01-18 10:38:25 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Well you married her knowing that she wasnt a virgin, so why make a big deal out of it now? You are only hurting yourself by replaying it in your head. You are the only thinker in your own mind, so dont blame her for your hurt feelings. Poor you, I hope she breaks your heart.
2007-01-18 11:08:18 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
well, can I first say that i can understand about the lie thing, no excuse but hey everyone makes mistake, now the other thing' come on you knew it before you ,married her and ya know what no matter what she loves you and she married you, do you really love her? because i am getting some kind of weird feeling you are looking for mistakes and reasons to break up this love affair, if you really love her its through sickness and health and death do us part... come on you are as bad as that lie she told, sit down and talk to her and get back on track remember why you fell in love with her, you made her a promise don't let her down... you are suppose to be her safe place her hero her rock, there is no room for dault or second thoughts...
2007-01-18 18:54:50 · answer #2 · answered by That girl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have trust issues that go beyong a hymen... or lack of it thereof.
This is really an obsessive thought, if I were here and you told me that I would think you are very very stupid. I would dump you immediately. So before you open your mouth make sure you really want to bring up this subject it could cause i terrible breach in your marriage forever.
2007-01-18 18:51:12 · answer #3 · answered by Wild_Lilly 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you love her it shouldn't matter, us Americans do things a little differently over here and take a poll, only about half of Americans wait until there married to have sex.
2007-01-18 18:43:19 · answer #4 · answered by lovelylittlelady 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Start to worry about something worth being woried about! Just because she's scared of you, doesn't mean go ahead and do whatever you want. Your feeling is that of wounded pride. Go to the gym and work out fo awhile and come home and kiss her and remember who she really is, and it doesn't matter what ethinicity you are because you human and she's human to, treat each other that way and you'll be fine.
2007-01-18 18:49:37 · answer #5 · answered by chapman_red 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You will do her a favor by setting her free - let her find a man who appreciates her for who she is, and not just for the presence or an absence of a hymen. And you can go on looking for your virgin. Grow up.
2007-01-18 18:43:25 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Love her for her and stay married to her... Even though she was not a virgin when she married you but that is ok as she is all yours now....
2007-01-18 18:52:07 · answer #7 · answered by Lady Hewitt 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Set her free and let her find one way superior to you, go get a virgin but remember only ordinary or ugly girls who are neither beautiful nor intelligent would brag about virginity cause this seems to be the only property they own. Good luck.
2007-01-18 18:51:02 · answer #8 · answered by dancingsnow 1 · 0⤊ 2⤋
u must be from some part of africa.............well dude that virgin thing was gd when grandpa's dad was still alive give her a break all women lie about money i do. if u wana leave her fine but dont go thinking u'll find u a virgin in this day n age cos u'll die looking unless u're a sick person who likes kids................didnt think so.
2007-01-18 18:53:03 · answer #9 · answered by lilac. 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
All women tell at least little white lies to their husbands about money...it's like a game, and definetly not worth losing someone you love over. You accepted her for who and what she was...if you leave her now your wrong.
2007-01-18 19:21:27 · answer #10 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋