Telling The Parents......?

Question

Alright so my parents are education orienated (sp). They made me take advanced classes through high school that I would pull a C+ or B- in, I was always a year or sometimes even 2 years ahead of everybody class wise. Im not the smartest guy around though, and I cant even imagine another 4 years of school after high school.

Ive talked to my counselar at school (ex-Marine), an Army Recruiter, and a Marine Recruiter. I WANT to enlist in the Marines and get an associates degree in Criminal Justice (I already have 12 of the 60 credits I need) while Im enlisted, but have no idea how to break it to my parents.

Im in good shape and can easily do the IST at the recruiting office and have good ASVAB scores, I want to enlist as Machine Gunner. Im sure you know the kind of parents Im talking about; all pro-college and my mom is totally anti-me going to the Military but my dad always supported ROTC or the Academies. But I WANT to enlist and get an associates degree from there, REALISICALLY,

how do I tell them and get a decent response from them? (Dads a cop so I thought the CJ Degree would help)

Answer 1

Well, you should tell them, and be prepared for them to be unhappy with your choice - at least initially.

Besides the higher education issue, we parents are FRIGHTENED TO DEATH at the thought of our beloved children going to war. At some point, you will have children, and you'll then (but not until then) be able to fully understand how strong parental love is. On top of that, it's our job to keep you healthy and well, and after getting you through so much, it's really hard to contemplate having you go somewhere that's so dangerous.

That said, we parents also learn that our adult children are adults, and that the dreams & goals we had for them may not match the dreams & goals they have for themselves.

Remind your parents that they did a fabulous job raising you, and because of that, you're now capable of making this decision for yourself. Also, when you go into the conversation, bring along back up info...I'm guessing that your recruiter can recommend some good books written by former or current soldiers, or even parents of them, about their experiences. Let them hear about the good side, and then give them some time to absorb it. They'll come around, really.

Oh, and BTW, let me just take a moment to say thanks. I appreciate you being there for us!

Answer 2

There is really no 'kind' way to tell them that will take the sting out of it . Your mother especially will be crying and your dad will just sit there and stare at you . Now, get ready if you mean it . i can feel through your account that you are motivated to do this . You want to get away from 4 more years of school ? Give me a break . How do you think you are gonna get that Associated Degree in Criminal Justice . Hey, And a Army or Marine recruiter is not a counselor to advise you about a college education They want to fill their quota and get you in there with a rosy picture . Fine, if you want to be in the military, but amount to something first . Get a degree in something. Go in then as a person who has charge of something. Otherwise , I assure you, you will be carrying an oil can till hell freezes over . Remember you were told and if/when you do this anyway , at least you did it with open eyes . Admit to yourself you want to be on your own and that is one way to do it . Uncle Sam will take good care of you and as long as you stay in line, you'll be fine . When your 4 years are up you will be older and wiser . Just don't make another mistake and get hitched to some girl you just met . Have fun on your own and kick your heels.
Can you tell by now this is the voice of experience ?
Just study hard whatever you do and take care of your health.
Good Luck .

Answer 3

First of all, you wirte nicely, and your parents did well so far! Congratulations.
Well, son, this is a good way to see if you can be diplomatic, and adult about it.
Hopefully, your trusted individuals have some pointers for breaking it to your parents. Theyshould probably have more experience with the young men who've gone through this, right? And they probably know some young men who backed out, because of their parents.
Aside from that, I think exactly what you said explains your side.
A smart parent knows that people tend to need Masters Degress to make it nowadays (but BA for police officer to start, that's great).
A wise parent knows that you'll figure that out once you get going. We parents can be wrong sometimes... if you need it, you'll do it later.
A loving parent is going to be heartbroken to think of you enlisting right now, I can just imagine.
But maybe proud, too.
Especially if you're not an only child, I think you can swing it.
Remember, don't throw the fact that this is your life, once you're 18, in their faces. If you are dedicated, you may one day have to draw that line, but don't do it until you're 18 and that recruiter is on his way, you get me?
My ex couldn't get in because of a very slight weight problem, and he ended up never going.
(I also knew a 22 year old woman who had lost her fiance, because they were going enlist together, and she broke her arm and couldn't get in.)
You could have any other reason in the world, so don't fight until you have to. BE firm, be calm, and remember, you must not raise your voice, etc. If you are to be a Marine, you will have to suffer much worse than the occassioanl fight with Mom and Dad.
Good luck.
Thank you for considering service to our country.

Answer 4

1. If you are considering a CJ degree because you think it will help break the news to your parents, reconsider the degree. You should get an associates degree, or other degree in something you are interested in, not what your parents want.

2. When my son told me he was going into the army instead of going to college, he just told me ... no whining, no dithering, no excuses. Just, Mom, I am going to join the army. I want to be an Army Ranger.

After I picked my jaw up from the floor, we (him, me and hubby)had a good talk about it, and decided that first off it was his life and if that was the way he wanted to go, then he should go that way, and second, that we were proud of him and the choice he made.

Good luck.