my life is going down nothing is fine....?

Question

im so miserable my husband does porn, he has another realtionship with a girl from the same industry i caught him and he told me that he is going to get tired of her soon that i have to chill out ,ha ,and the worse thing is that we been trought divorse a couples of month ago for domestic violence i end it up living in a shelter with my daughter for like 2 month and when we when to court he got a very good laywer and he got a fake wittnness saying that he was at work when the insident happen and they took the restringer order , and i had to come back with him because i want to take care of my daughter i dont trust him at all specially for the kind of job that he has...also he told me that if i try to do something again he will send somebody to kill me ,what can i do

Answer 1

Get out and stay out! For the sake of yours and your daughter's safety, you need to just get away (far away) and start over.

I wish you well.

God bless!

Answer 2

No matter what you have to get out. Go specifically to a women's shelter where they be a little better than the one you were at. Women's shelters are supposed to help you as you look for a job (if you don't have one). If you have family try to get to them. You need to end it for the sake of you and your child. If you really do get a divorce you can leave, don't go back, and if you have a job you can have custody of your child and get child support and a real restraining order. If he really does work in porn a judge with high morals will possibly award you custody for a while. Plus if you get a divorce you are entitled to have of the combined family income which is easy to tell because he get pay checks that have to be reported to the government or that is tax evasion. Also in a real divorce you need an attorney and there are some that do Pro bono publico a.k.a pro bono (work for free) at legal aid along with other places or don't get money unless you do.
There are many choices rather than staying in a bad marriage.

Answer 3

You know the answer to this question already. You create your own reality, if this is the kind of lifestyle you want for you and yours then stick it out and continue to be miserable. My advice to you is to take action, don't sit and talk about what you'd like to do, just do it, make it happen. Make a better life for yourself and your daughter. Do you want her to grow up thinking she should accept being treated this way? There are many resources available to help you out of this situation but no one is going to do it for you. Start by checking with your local Family Independance agency ( found in the government section of any phone book) they will guide you in the right direction.Secondly I would consider taking some spelling classes :) Whatever you decide keep your daughters future in mind, you are responsible for teaching her to act as an adult. I really wish the best for you and hope that someones answer here really speaks to you.

Answer 4

Firstly - determine that you WILL have a better life.
Secondly - get out of this situation
Thirdly - recognize that you have set out on a long hard road-
Fourthly - go where it takes - you must have some skills, some knowledge, etc. What you need is faith in yourself and determination.
As a man that last might seem easy to say - but given my own history I do have a sense of where you are coming from. Believe me - you have hit the point where it is necessary to go back to square one and start all over. Very hard, I know. Ultimately the best alternative right now. God Bless.

Answer 5

Start over.... you do NOT need a man to take good care of your child. Money doesn't equal "good care." Your daughter is better of with someone who loves her and cares about her future emotional stability... he obviously does not. Do you? Get out NOW while you still have your life. He will continue to abuse you, and possibly your daughter, until one or both of you are dead.

Go BACK to the shelter... or any shelter... and tell them you need to get OUT of your current lifestyle. If you don't want to do it for yourself... do it for that baby girl... they will walk you through the legal aspects of a restraining order (even tho it seems futile, do it anyway), and therapy, and getting on your OWN two feet so that you can support you and your child.

Remember... MONEY does not equal happiness... for you or your child. I'd rather feel safe and secure than have money in the bank. Give your child a future she deserves by showing her that women do not deserve to be treated the way your husband AND his industry treats women.

Answer 6

This is a relationship you must get out of, if not for yourself then for your daughters sake! This man obviously is not a good father and the icing on the cake is the fact that he's threatened to kill his child's mother! What does that say about the kind of man he is! Maybe you could stay with your family until you can get somewhere to live permanently.

Answer 7

Dont you have family that can help you? I mean yeah you probably would have to work but at least you are giving your kid a good life and she is not seeing all those things u r telling me about your husband. Start working now and when you have enough money move out!

Answer 8

you're being a mentally abused. record this the the police, go away the homestead along with your daughter, bypass to a kin homestead , lady protect, strive against back on your and your daughters sake. If he threaten then you definitely record yet another grievance and word a criminal amenities criminal professional. save looking for you a sturdy criminal help criminal professional and strive against back. make positive you write each little thing down in a letter, save it in a secure position provide it to a pal to carry. you want to rfile it on your perfect ability. purchase are digital recorder and once you've heated arguments turn it on and record it privately. then you definitely have information. Get out and search for help yet do it in a sensible and planned way. strive against on your daughter and your self and take administration of your existence. you do not choose him.

Answer 9

Hi there, im so sorry for what you are going through, i know lots of people that are in relationships like you and always go back, there are plenty of people out there that will help you, i have a happy marraige so i dont know what your are going through because i have never been put in your position but i know i would never let a man treat me like that, you and your daughter should get away from him, as i said there are lots of help out there for people like you, hope you get things sorted,,,, good luck and loads of hugs xxx

Answer 10

run run run, as fast as you can, this is serious here. porn affairs, violence, death threats? get you and your daughter outta there fast. i know its not easy and dont know your financial situation but anything is better than livin in this hell. get as far away as poss doesnt matter if its the biggest s h it hole at least you ll be safe you ll get on your feet again, please leave him now dont wait for things to get worse. tell no one where you are going even close family members leave no trail, theyll understand when you contact them when things have settled. i hope you r okay. i live in ireland but if u need a [e-mail]