A friend of mine feels like she is sinking in her marriage and she is trapped..?

Question

She feels that her husband is a dead end and not able to lead her properly but he seems to be doing a good job with a career and paying the bills. She recently hooked up with a big money sugar daddy who is going to put her up in an apartment and pay the rent and daycare for her kid so she can lead the life she feels that she deserves.

In so many words she called the husband a loser but he is an OK looking guy who has paid the bills etc. who seems to do OK with women and he probably won't have a problem dating and finding a meaningful relationship.

Question: Is this common and do you think it is because she is educated/super ambitious and he is blue collar/satisfied with a $50K year job and a new truck? He says her sights are impossibly high for the family and will always have her climbing/competing but not enjoying. She says his lack of passion for bettering himself and being promoted is pathetic. What do you say?

She thinks that she is in love with the sugar daddy who is a flashy, smooth talking older guy. She married her husband who is a blend into the background type of guy who handles his business but lives a quieter life. The husband was concerened that they may not work but she says that she loves the husband and does not want to lose him but she is starting to resent him and feel like she is drowning. She said she would love to be with the husband and grow old with him and she knows that the sugar daddy is a temporary thing but she is still willing to trader her marriage for a short lived fling and the money from the sugar daddy. She re-assures the husband that she will come back home after she has made something of herself and got the sugardaddy out of her system. The husband is done, sick to his stomach. She tells him not to be so insecure. What's your angle?

Its my opinion that she will wind up on her face because when she starts cheating on the sugar daddy and being super demanding then the money will dry up and she will try to crawl home to the husband.

Answer 1

I think your friend is pathetic! I think the husband should say good riddence and move on. He should keep the kids so she doesn't ruin them. She'll end up alone and miserable wondering what she has done and I sure wouldn't let her come crawling home because she never really loved him to begin with.

Answer 2

Obviously she's only thinking about herself and not doesn't understand that you go into a marriage with the attitude what will I get out of it. When you get married you go into it as 2 individuals, but as they say in the marriages the 2 shall become 1, meaning that as a husband and wife, you need to work at putting your partner before yourself.

To make any marriage work, you have to have a very self-less attitude. Where you put your spouse and their feelings and needs way before your own. I think she's being VERY selfish. It's great that he's doing a good job with his career and sounds like he's supportive of his family, but I think she's expecting too much out of him.

Answer 3

She needs counseling and help and she needs to stop being selfish and work on the marriage.... Trust me this so called sugar daddy is just that for the money and not for love and commitment....

Answer 4

your friend should not let anyone pay for anything that huge. her 'sugar daddy' could be doing this just to get something out of it later on for himself. she needs to be paying her own rent and taking care of her own bills. her 'sugar daddy' could hold this over her head later on. she needs to be careful.

Answer 5

I have to side with her on this one. Lack of ambition in a man is pathetic. I'm a sucker for brilliant and intelligent men who know how to apply their skills.