Can anyone give advice on how to change my bad attitude?

Question

Recently I've been so irritable. People in school think I'm the sweetest thing ever, but they don't know my other side. Sometimes I'm ready to explode. I have so much emotion that I just want to rip someone apart. I don't want to do anything that's irrational so can someone give me advice. Don't tell me anything about medication because that's not the answer. i will be seeing my school counselor pretty soon. I could be a complete ***** sometimes and I hate that about myself. My own actions which seem uncontrollable sometimes make me cry. I just want to explode. Maybe i have to much time on my hands. I'm not so thrilled about my environment. I don't have the good friends that I want and guys always send me mixed signals. People see me as a very sweet and understanding person, yet they don't know me at all. I don't want to take crap from anyone. So much anger.

How can I be a more patient person. I want to be calm.

I need to chill. I stress things a lot.

LKEWISE, I like your answer. That will certainly change me.

I'm 19 years of age

Too much sexual tension, maybe.

I meditate all the time. My body is flexible from doing yoga. I still have anger.

Answer 1

Behavior is learned and it can be unlearned. I'm not a fan of medication and think it should be the very last resort. Nothing you have said makes me think you need medication. Seeing a counselor is a very good first step. Your feelings are not unique to you alone. Many of us feel that if the world knew who we really were, we would be rejected. Do you feel like you're fooling the world with your attitude of "sweetest thing"? That's a common feeling. I think you are unwilling to accept yourself as a good person. Society does not allow us to express our true feelings at all times, so we stuff them deep inside. Practical advice-seek out the people you would like to emulate and make them your friends. Your time is school is short and school pressure is high. When you leave school, many of your friends will be out of your life. Take a broader prospective on life. If you can remember this simple prayer, it may help. "God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference." You do not have to pray or believe in God, but study the wisdom in that prayer. Accept yourself and accept the things that anger you and you cannot fix. Do not seek perfection. Live in the "now"; the moment you are in. You need to really be honest with your counselor and talk out your feelings. You are burying too much. Finally, buy and read a simple book on meditation. It has nothing to do with religion. Use the techniques in the book. You are not feeling anything that the rest of us have not also felt. You only need a coping mechanism. You know your friends aren't good for you, so change them. Sorry to be so long-winded. Good luck.

Answer 2

Medication would not be a good idea, to start off with. Sometimes when people look inside themselves, they can find where the problem lies. If you step back and assess the situation at hand, you'll figure out what the solution is. If that doesn't work, find somewhere private, take a deep breathe, and just let all the tension go. If this helps count to ten, backwards. Sometimes people over-exaggerate the problem at hand. It might even be something as small as somebody making an ff-hand remark about something they think that you did wrong. But, in reality they screwed something up trying to blame you for something that they did wrong. All the "crap" that people are giving out, you shouldn't let it have any affect on you. As long as you're comfortable with who you are. Because regardless of what anybody else has to say about you, all you have to remember is this: You Are Beautiful

Answer 3

The first step has already been taken. You realized your bad attitude, and you want to change. Start off slow. Think about all of the great things in your life. You're young, you have support. Your parents (You might consider asking them for help with this) Tell them you want to change, and need their support. Consider church, if your family is into that. Ask for help from God. he helps me because I have a very short fuse as well. Consider getting a part time job. It will keep you busy and you can feel good when you earn your own money to spend on things you WANT. As for your friends, suggest to them that you could change and do other things besides partying. If you can't even be open with them then they really aren't your friends... Go meet new people, socialize with people that don't party so much. Last stop being so negative. You most like have a great life. You might even be spoiled. but I don't know you. Be thankful. Because it could always be worse girl. You could be missing a limb, deaf or blind or living in a country where your parents abandoned you so they could take care of themselves.

Answer 4

I'm a war veteran. I used to have so much anger that once I put my fist thru a door actually my whole arm, I could look around the door and wave at myself. Others didn't know the real me but God did. When I found out that I needed help I turned to HIM, gave HIM my problems. Can't remember what some of my problems were. Now there are times when I notice the beauty and fragrance of the trees and flowers and hear the birds in the morning. Usually when I have a lady friend to walk on the beach with. O HEY! have you noticed lately how quickly the sun sets once it meets the ocean? Now when I'm angry, sad, depressed,you name it ,I spend time with the LORD, HIS WORD.. the Bible brings me peace usually in less than a minute.It's fantastic. The only thing it doesn't affect is loneliness. I have to go directly to HIM for that.

Answer 5

Always remember honey is sweeter than lemons when u smile a t someone they are bound to smile back.If u frown at someone they will frown back.I learnt this myself i was bitter and also angry sometimes wondering why I was.There must be something bothering u for u 2 feel this way and u should try to find out what the real problem is.Is yr self esteem high enough?You gotta do something to make yrself feel good aobut yrself.And guys...Try not to worry aobut them i think u r young so there is and will be plenty of fish in the sea for u in yr lifetime.And u shouldnt have to take any crap from anyone either u can still be sweet and strong minded never let anyone walk all over u so stay that way.good luck I hope u find some happiness go for a walk when u feel down it helps me .

Answer 6

I commend you for realizing your attitude and wanting to change it, you have made your first step into conquering "the Beast". You sound like it's a mix of hormones and something that happened to you that is really bad and you can't come to terms with. Something so buried inside that you are afraid to let it out but it's so strong that it's overflowing, coming through your pores if you will.

There is nothing wrong with being angry as long as you deal with it wisely. Counseling is good but you really have to feel safe and secure, trust your counselor. If you aren't happy with that one find one that you trust. You need to bleed your soul of whatever it is, it may be concious or not, it could be something you aren't even aware of. It could be your parents, your friends, your siblings. Maybe people think your sweet and take advantage of you and you kind of let them. We do that sometimes to be accepted and that is only human so don't feel bad. There might have been an incident when you were small or several things.

I am glad that you are getting help, you are a good person inside and you deserve to be happy in life and this can't be a happy time for you. Try to find your smile again, life sucks and what little happiness you can squeeze out of it is worth it. Find the people who will stand with you when you fall and stand for you when you can't. Good luck and I hope you feel better.

Answer 7

Sounds like a mixture of PMS, and stress, and loneliness,

Need to take you birthcontrol pills and if you aren't taking any then start.

next find a way to get to the salon , to get a manicure and pedicaure once a week, i always feel prettier and happier and less stressed out after a good visit to the salon.


finally and most importantly,
you need to " RELEASE" the sexual tension.

Vibrators and masterbation are the best way to go, if you don't have a fellow yet.

Once you've done this for about amonth you'll be relaxed and feeling back to normal, and then your Signals won't be confusing either.

I mean its kinda like shaking a soda bottle, of course your gonna explode, at some point you have to unscrew the cap.

and just let it out.

Good luck

Meg

Answer 8

Join the club honey...the thing is i feel bad for you cause you need what they call an "outlet" a way for you to get your anger and frustration across in a healthy way. You need some type of hobby or something you can do when you feel this way..this will calm you down and teach you patience. Counselors are good however maybe if you ran everyday or went to the gym...took up some craft or something...beading is very calming you might feel better!!!

Answer 9

There is a video out about the rules of attraction, and it simplifies it better than i can. I saw it at college, freshman year. Don't remeber the name of it, but it actually works. What you are doing when you are getting so irratable and ready to explode is attractring a negative force. I know it sounds korny as hell, but try to believe it. When you start your day off bad you start the cycle of attracting negative things, this just starts a cycle of frustration, and irratability. You can actually bring positive and good things to you.. Some people pray for them and some just ask. What ever works for you, you must think of positive good things to attract them. There are so many ways to do this. Hang up somethying you want that makes you feel good, or somethings you really want, whether it be a good mood , happiness, or even material items. This is called the rule of attraction. You have to attract positive stuff that you want, that means thinking about it, hangin a picture up, setting goals, talking about them, praying about them, what ever it takes to attract those things. Right now with all this anger built up you are attracting negative and it is pulling you into a downward spiral, that is only getting worse. So to get out of it, this might sound silly but, you need to attract positive and things that make you tick. So my suggestion, make a list at least 10 things that you are happy for, and 10 things you want out of your life. Keep goals, vizualize and try to attract the stuff you want out of life, and try not to attract the anger and negative stuff you dont want. Positive begets positive, and negative begets negative. I know its easier said then done. Wish you well..

Answer 10

hey sister...i have the same problem..i am 18 years of age..ppl think i am really sweet n bubbly..but my truth is i smoke 10 ciggs per day n cut myself every other day...i dont know what to do...i am helpless..but one advice i can give u..time will heal..also try making some friends who can understand u..maybe people on the net..because ..online u can give ur emotions in a better way...actually my answer makes no sense..bt i'l pray things get fine for me n u.,.
take care