I feel as though I loved my ****** ex more so than I do my new boyfriend. My last boyfriend I was jealous of and was drama-filled. This one is very relaxing and calm but I feel as though I dont love him as much for some reason. Is it because this relationship is calm and in my previous relationship I was always on edge and trying to prove my love? This is my first drama free relationship and I care about him ALOT. I am 24 and we have been together for 5 months. The first 4 months WERE WONDERFUL! and now I feel as though I dont love him as much?!?!?!
2007-01-18 01:25:39 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
You first have to recognize what kind of person you have been molded into and decide if you are okay with that. Your feelings are very normal but if you realize that your feelings aren't right for you to maybe mature and leave a lifestyle that tend to keep you attracting the wrong attention, then begin to work on yourself. Maybe God has given you this boyfriend to help you mature or learn to live without 'drama'. It appears that you've been blessed to experience what 'self-control' is. You sound as though you are bored and miss the substitute for 'excitement' that your past relationship gave you. If you think that I may have a point then make a decision as to which lifestyle is better and if you are ready to allow this change to take place. Otherwise you will end up hurting a good guy in the name of immaturity. Does this guy treat you like a lady? Does he treat you with respect by asking you for and then listening to your opinion. Has he introduced you to his peeps? Does he keep his word? Can you take the brother anywhere and not have to worry about fighting your way out because of something he said or did? Then I'd say if he has a pretty good salary or trying to better himself and keeping you in mind -you've got yourself a winner! I think that his purpose in your life is to groom you for a far greater lifestyle than what you may used to have had. Congratulations! And recognize that your old feelings are feelings of nostalgia. Because you miss someone or something or a lifestyle doesn't mean you need it.
2007-01-18 01:47:22 · answer #1 · answered by MeHurdu 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe what you were going through for the first 4 months was not Love at all, just Great Happiness. Give it time. Love usually doesn't come in just 5 months. Sometimes it takes longer than that. I am in a drama free relationship as well (for the first time). It takes some adjusting. You'll get used to it. Just enjoy it for what it is, and stop comparing it.
2007-01-18 01:29:52 · answer #2 · answered by mizzoutiger18 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Loving the right person at the wrong time, having the wrong person when the time is right, and finding out you love someone right after that person walks out of your life... And sometimes, you think you're already over a person, But when you see them smile at you, you'll suddenly realize that you're just pretending to be over them just to ease the pain of knowing that they will never be yours again... For some, they think that letting go is one way of expressing how much you love the person... In my opinion, some are afraid to see the one they love being held by someone else... Most relationships tend to fail not because the absence of love - love is always present. It's just that one was being loved too much and the other was being loved too little... As we all know the heart is the center of the body but it beats on the left. Maybe that's the reason why the heart is not always right... Most often, we fall in love with the person we think we love but to only discover that for them, we are just for past times, while the one who truly loves us remains either a friend or a stranger... So here's a piece of advice: Let go when you're hurting too much. Give up when love isn't enough, and move on when things are not like before... For sure, there is someone out there who will love you even more...
2007-01-18 02:21:40 · answer #3 · answered by eeekkk 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You like the bad boys... This is very common. You are used to guys treating you like sh*t and because this new one doesn't you are questioning your feelings.
You have to realize you were making bad choices before and setting yourself up for drama and hurt, because you have low self esteem and don't think you deserve someone who treats you right.
You need to re-examine your self and figure out who you really are. Are you a hurt individual who knows nothing else, or are you going to let your spirit heal and find some calmness and goodness and let it into your life.
Bad boys will always be bad, to everyone they meet. Few of them really mature , they just mask it better. These are very insecure people who have not been brought up with love and caring by their parents. They have been left to fend for themselves any way they could. So take that into consideration before you think that a peaceful existence with a man is not enough.
Do some soul searching, get in touch with the inner you and just let go of the hurt, struggles and drama that have taken over your life.
relax and enjoy.....he is probably the best thing that has happened to you and this is your chance to heal...He is in your life for a reason.. Open your eyes and your heart....
2007-01-18 01:35:25 · answer #4 · answered by doclakewrite 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Jealousy is the belief or idea that your significant other has hidden communication lines with someone. This creates uncertainty in a relationship (not the best kind but it's still uncertainty) and we need certainty and uncertainty simultaneously, this is what creates excitement. ie. in the beginning of your relationship with this new boyfriend there would have been the uncertainty of when the first kiss, touch etc would happen but it would be inevitable, this creates the excitement. When you become too certain it becomes less exciting so the remedy is to create uncertainty (not by making him jealous either) by doing and giving unexpectedly, i'm sure you can use your imagination.
2007-01-18 01:39:20 · answer #5 · answered by MJR 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Youve turned into a drama queen. If this isnt something you want to be, you might want to learn to love the new bf for who he is. Also, id do some reevaluating of your priorities in life. Youre not in high school, youre 24 and you dont really have time to get involved with the headache of childish relationships. Grow up, get over it, and accept this dude..because nice guys dont come around to women twice. Every woman thats with an asshole now will tell you about her regret. peace
8
2007-01-18 01:33:00 · answer #6 · answered by INFINITE CONSCIOUSNESS 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like it's time to put a little punch into your relationship. I know it sounds bad, but I like to test my man. Just little things for example I have a 4yr old and I'll oops run late for work and need him to babysit, when he has no problem with it and they have a blast together it makes me feel better about how things are. Before I used my daughter as a pawn I would ask him to plan out a day together, dinner a movie what ever he wanted. By playing it his way it helped us get closer on his level and it made it a little more interesting. If your sexually involved pop in a porn and watch it with him it'll change the whole situation! either way good luck with things!
2007-01-18 01:35:53 · answer #7 · answered by suprsarah 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
omg i hate this question so much. is for girls like u that a lot guys think women like bad boys. B/S i love my nice guy and the day that he becomes a jerk "bye bye" i need to be treated good. what is wrong with u. im not saying u need to love ur current boyfriend but saying u dont cuz ur ex -relationship had more drama that is just so stupid. im sorry my intension is not to offend u but i get pissed at girls who think like u. good luck been mistreated!!!!
2007-01-18 01:55:05 · answer #8 · answered by Blondie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You were accustomed to the emotional roller coaster of your past relationship. Believe me, what you have now is much better. It's better for you, it's better for your health. Things may seem lots different but love is love, and love that comes easily is the best kind. You shouldn't have to try to prove your love. It should just come naturally.
2007-01-18 01:31:50 · answer #9 · answered by Jfranc1 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
properly, when you're somewhat large in luv with the guy then dont care about the jealousy in basic terms track it out, yet in case you aint so loopy about this guy then jealousy is deffinetly gr8er then luv, in reality, it quite in many cases allways is, even once you recognize he loves you you'll nonetheless get jealous.
2016-10-15 09:52:30 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋