Has anyone besides me had a problem with a police officer listening to your domestic violence complaint and tell you that the other person needs to be accountable for their actions, but then they turn around and when they talk to your spouse essentially tell them they didnt do anything wrong and basically just make things worse by reinforcing the problem in the first place?
This just happened to me and im disgusted at the way my husband now feels i was at fault for even going to the police and treating me like he doesnt have to do anything to change the way he acts. I would just like to know if anyone else has had problems with this or with the police basically telling both parties whatever they want to hear...
2007-01-17 21:04:58 · 9 answers · asked by moonrat1984 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
The worse part is that this was a female cop whom i thought i could trust...
2007-01-17 21:15:51 · update #1
Law enforcement officers are required to listen to both sides and make a field decision if a crime has happened and who is the victim and who is the wrong doer and if an arrest is warranted, and what charges to be filed. Many times in domestic violence cases an arrest is not made but instead the case is turned over to the local DAs office for further investigation and possible charges. He is not allowed to make personal judgements in the case, but sometimes the officer does overstep his boundaries and interjects personal remarks. You can file a complaint against the officer with his supervisor if you feel this is warranted and that he did more harm than good. This happens alot everyday. Maybe this at least showed your husband that youre not afraid of him and will notify the authorities when necessary and hopefully he realizes that next time he just might go to jail. I hate to hear things like this. Youre not at fault if you feel threatened and notify the authorities instead of taking matters into your own hands and blowing the situation way out of proportion. Please just dont let this incident stop you from notifying the police again if you need them. Good luck
2007-01-17 21:25:54 · answer #1 · answered by Arthur W 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes it is a common problem I have expereinced as a DV worker and my women. Some of it comes down to attitude, perhaps a perpetrator of violence themselves, time and repeat reporters. There is not enough education regarding domestic violence in the police force. you have a right to complain, you might not know the name or number of the officer but there will be a log at the office of who was dispatched to attend to your complaint. Dont be the victim of two males, make that report, become a survivor and make sure other women dont receive your treatment. Minimising DV is not on, go find a woman's service of some sort for help
2007-01-17 21:13:47 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
The police just (usually) want to get things calmed down and get out. If you actually want to press charges and have a valid claim, then I believe the police will have to do so for you. If the police do not do that and you are a victim of domestic violence, then go to the district attorney's office and file charges.
Do not stay in a relationship where you are a victim of domestic violence.
2007-01-17 22:08:12 · answer #3 · answered by Patti C 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well first did he hit you or did it turn physical in anyway? Ok now you my not want to hear this but I'm a police officer, here in MS when we respond to a domestic, we will separate the parties to talk to them for reasons of intimidation, after we hear both sides of the complaint we make a desicion to have one party leave the residence, but if there is physical evidence on one of the party the other party goes to jail, the law actually states the local law enforcement officer responding to the request for assistance shall take whatever steps are reasonably necessary to protect the complainant from harm and advise the complainant of sources of shelter, and medical care. You can also sign simple assault charges on your husband-a person is guilty of simple assault if he/she attempts to cause or purposely, knowingly or recklessly causes bodily injury attempts by physical menace to put another in fear of imminent serious bodily harm, now I'm not sticking up for that officer so you might want to talk to his superiors (chief, sheriff) hope that helps and that incident doesnt make you distrust all police officers.
2007-01-17 21:34:32 · answer #4 · answered by colvin0594 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
youre should file on the officer who came out by law someone should have gone to jail if your husband hit you its your right to put him in jail also you have the right to file a resistant order from the court to keep your husband away from you and if come close to you you can call the cop no one has the right to put their hand on you and youre not a door mat ether good luck next time asked the officer to call a sgt and tell him what happen
2007-01-17 21:30:56 · answer #5 · answered by nightman122554 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow thats so bad, they dont seem to do much good do they? I had the opposite, they were heaps nice to me, but then pretty much told my partner at the time, that for a man to beat up on someone weaker than him he must have a small... well you know. He was so mad after that that when the cops left it was even worse!
2007-01-17 21:14:48 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well the police, are just that, police. While mediation is a facet of their job their primary one is law enforcement. What I think you need is a trained counselor or psychologist.
2007-01-17 21:10:14 · answer #7 · answered by Frank R 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Go to a professional marriage counsellor.
2007-01-17 21:56:01 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋