I told my cousin she is fat and she needs to go on a diet and she got defensive and i told her i can make 2 me's with one of her..... am i being mean just cuz im worried and so i said something about her weight?
2007-01-17 19:17:50 · 6 answers · asked by GQsmooth 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
i think it's not mean because after all you are trying to help her. If she doesn't accept it then it means she doesn't except herself and she want's to actually loose some weight. So I think it's good to speak your mind. I like to speak my mind espeasially when I feel very strong about something.
2007-01-18 09:10:00 · answer #1 · answered by Summer 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
After your last question about wanting legislation for people who need physicals and are hairy before they buy bikinis, I would have thought you'd learned your lesson. Guess you haven't read your answers yet.
Who set you up as judge and jury about weight guidelines? No, you weren't being mean--just incredibly cruel and insensitive. Don't you think she knows she's overweight every time she looks in the mirror or tries on clothing? I wouldn't blame her if she had punched you in your big mouth. Instead, the poor girl probably went home and cried or binged--which, incidentally, she knew with every bite was something she didn't need to be doing.
Why not be nice and give her a gift certificate to an all female gym or buy her some workout equipment? You can look in the classifieds of your paper and get some good bargains on used treadmills. You could offer in a nice way to go for daily walks together. Maybe you'd discover there's a nicer person inside her than there is in you.
And by the way, how do we know she's that much overweight? It could be that you're one of those scrawny guys that in the 1950's would read the Charles Atlas bodybuilding ads in the back of their Archie comic books. Think about it: if you have a certain perception of her, what do other people see about you?
2007-01-18 03:35:15 · answer #2 · answered by goldie 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hm i guess it depends on how you said it exactly, maybe you could help her by playing a sport or something with her....well of course she was going to get defensive, you just insulted her body.
but if you are worried you should let her know and tell her that you will be there for her, and perphaps help her lose the weight as a friend to catch her if she falls.
good luck
2007-01-18 05:08:50 · answer #3 · answered by heather feather 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
thats just mean dude. i mean, you can tell her she needs to go on a diet and stuff, but you dont need to say you need 2 of you to make 1 of her and all that.. thats just mean and unnecessary.. i would tell her you were just playing around next time.. and just tell her how much better she could look if she lost a little weight.. constructive criticism!
2007-01-18 03:26:27 · answer #4 · answered by Curly Haired Cutie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no your not being mean at all. might want to say hey im going on a diet and need some 1 to do it with me to keep me strong .
2007-01-18 03:26:48 · answer #5 · answered by pmcl7725 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
At least be constructive, man. If my cousin was fat, I'd poke her and make faces at her too, but I'd also bring her to the gym with me and we'd at least do cardio together.
You can't get people to do things by pushing them, but leading them works very well.
2007-01-18 03:22:56 · answer #6 · answered by John C 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋