I'm gay but not in the open, and that question happen often in a bar setting or behind-the-door of the sauna at the gym. Notice that the ''do you have a girlfriend?" is one of the most immediate question being asked. It puzzle me. I'm not paranoid, I just think it's a bit odd.
2007-01-17 17:11:29 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
To ask if you have a girlfriend is not a normal (or appropriate) question to ask a man in the situations you have described, especially for another male who is a total stranger. When you sense someone like that is really interested in you in a sexual sense, you are correct. That's not a direct "pickup line," but it is what I would call "fishing," seeing if you are possibly not straight and interested in a sexual encounter. He is not exactly putting himself in harms way by asking you for sex, but he is gradually getting to that point. (You may have been very well a straight guy, but he is not sure.)
Anyone who can't see the validity of your question about this type of situation probably has never been a single man, alone , no matter his orientation. Young, single, good looking guys who take care of themselves -- and are seemingly alone -- at the gym, shower, locker room, etc. get propositioned by other men. And most of the time these guys are older than you. Whenever you sense an over-interest in you by another adult male who is a total stranger, and you are alone and out of ear shot of others, a red warning flag should go up in your mind.
If someone asks you something like that in a very public place, around other people, I see nothing wrong with that. But the CONTEXT of the place is very important in the interpretation of his question. You are completely alone with such a male stranger and he asks that question? The conversation most probably will lead to other questions or admiration of your physique, etc. and then he'll talk about what he is really after, either there, in the sauna, or elsewhere.
2007-01-17 17:39:03 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
If it is a straight bar, then it may be a gay guy just wondering in case they have a chance. As for the sauna though, LOL. Depending where you work out. Not all, but if it were the Ballys in Lakeview area of Boystown there is a good chance you are gay in that sauna. It may just be the surroundings, conversations, attitude you are having at the moment they ask. This answer was brought to you by me.
2007-01-17 17:40:12 · answer #2 · answered by The Gay Argentian Seal 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes they ask that because they have suspicions about your sexuality and, more often then not, they ask to make conversation.The best way to handle it is to either tell the truth and come out or just say that you're single.If you lie and say you have a girlfriend and you don't then you might be digging yourself a hole of lies.
2007-01-17 17:23:30 · answer #3 · answered by BuckFush 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This is just a normal question people ask to get to know you. People constantly ask me my age and if I am married, just in an effort to make converstation. You are being super paranoid.
2007-01-17 17:15:15 · answer #4 · answered by bashnick 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
You could seem like a very friendly person people would like to get to know. Or you could be drop dead hot...either way, good for you, enjoy it and don't try to hard to mess up a good thing by over thinking it...Have fun...
2007-01-17 17:23:52 · answer #5 · answered by Dusenberg 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Maybe they're gay, too, and want to see if the vibe they're getting from you is right.
2007-01-17 17:33:00 · answer #6 · answered by GreenEyedLilo 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
don't you know 'love at first sight'? they feel the spark, and they hope u feel it too. since u r one of them, why not give ppl a chance?
2007-01-17 18:30:12 · answer #7 · answered by Xian 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
maybe they are checking if you're gay. Sometimes people can tell even if you're hiding.
2007-01-17 17:14:06 · answer #8 · answered by Mark F 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
you pick up gay dar radar.
it's a gay thing , but it does exist .
2007-01-17 18:59:46 · answer #9 · answered by john john 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What is your question? Your paranoid of what?
2007-01-17 17:16:40 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋