My ex wife is dying.?

Question

I am unsure how to handle this with our children. They are over 18 years old and fighting about turning off the machines. She has a living will that no support machines be used but allowed the hospital to connect her before she went unconscious.
I told my oldest she is in charge, legally, but her sister is determined she will live. They have had professional help before for their fighting.

Answer 1

You must follow what your ex-spouse would have wanted as outlined in her Advance Directives. This supersedes what any family member feels is best. Quality of life is poor for your ex-spouse. Let her go with dignity.

**Your ex-spouse may have told the hospital staff to keep some treatment going, but she was most likely in a confused state of mind at that moment & wasn't thinking of life in the long term (as she was thinking when she signed the advance directives).
Honor her wishes above anyone else. Good Luck!

Answer 2

You are in a tough situation. However, I think you need to remind your youngest daughter about her mothers wishes. She should respect the living will. If your youngest daughter is that determined she will live, then maybe the oldest can agree to another week on life support. If she's still unconscious after a week, its time to respect her wishes. I think a compromise is needed to make this easier on both of your daughters. In ten years from now you don't want your youngest hanging on to how your oldest took their mother away. This way they can both look back on it and at least say they gave it a try. Good luck to you and your family and I'm sorry for your impending loss.

Answer 3

Wow I am so sorry to hear this. A living will is only good if you go by what is stated in it. When you were married did the two of you discuss what would you do if something like this happens? It is a hard situation to ever deal with. You always want the hope that your loved one will get better but if there really is not a chance that this will happen why not let her go to a better place. She made a living will and it will be hard but you need to do what she wishes. God bless.

Answer 4

I am really sorry you are having to go through with this. You need to let them know what this fighting is doing to you. Even if you did get a divorce, I know part of you probably still cares about your ex, and they need to know that. And if they continue to fight over the issue, maybe you should seek some legal counsel as well. Hopefully though if they find out how you feel, they will be more understanding and try to reach some agreement on this issue. I do wish you luck, and my thoughts and prayers will be with you.

Answer 5

Both children are adults. They both know their mothers wishes, see the will. Looks like the ex wanted to cause one more disruption b4 she goes. Was she a vindictive woman? Is there any chance of survival? If it's machines only then the quality of life would not be good. Is number 2 prepaired to see her Mum vegitate away on a machine? Who's paying for it? Stand back, let them sort it out.

Answer 6

I know it's hard, How long has she been like this? How would she feel if you were in this situation? Do you think she is happy how she is right now? If there 1 in a million chance that she might live but is she is dying slowing and the machines are just keeping her alive then your just hurting her.

Answer 7

Sometimes you can change your mind about living Will's when it comes right down to it.That is why I myself have never made one.She had hope for her self when she told them to hook her up and it would be very hard for me as a daughter to make the call the will, or the last decision she made. Talk to the Dr. the Dr will have the last say anyway I mean if it comes to a court matter or something.As for as your daughter's I would talk to both of them, ask them to think only of their mother and what is best for her. To try and remove all other thing's that may be be between them.

Answer 8

Many extra information ought to easily accept for an adequate diagnosis of this scenario. were you able the position you've gotten saved her yet did not? Husband and better halves have a duty to help eachother while strangers many times do no longer. in case you're literally not married to her anymore, a restaraunt proprietor might want to nonetheless have a particular courting with their buyers to call for help to boot besides the undeniable fact that. became there slightly of glass in the nutrition or another ingredient in touch that became an act of negligence? If it became an entire twist of destiny eating frequent nutrition, then there might want to be little if any criminal duty. all of it would want to boil right down to no matter if you: a million.) had a "duty;" 2.) that you "breached" that duty; 3.) that your breach became the actual and proximate "reason" of her harm; 4.) and that she suffered "damages" as a effect. If there became no rooster play then that would want to on the prompt rule out any criminal criminal duty because criminal criminal duty includes a culpable recommendations set. Tort criminal duty might want to likely be found yet we choose extra information. There only isn't adequate concepts right here to make a sturdy assesment of what the great result might want to properly be. EDIT: i quite wish it truly is a scenario for college or some thing. it truly is only customary talk. If there is any authentic substance to this hypo, search for suggestion from an criminal professional approved in the right jurisdiction for criminal suggestion.

Answer 9

I guess it is up to your girls to make a very hard choice. I would say talk to them ask them how old is the living will? It may be out of date and that is why they are not doing what there mother asked. If it is up to date them they need to go by her wishes. You girls may just be having a hard time letting go. I know I would. I am lad to hear that you are there for them they need you know more than ever. I wish you and your family good luck with this and my heart goes out to you all

Answer 10

I know it must be terribly hard on your children but as they are old enough to understand about your Ex wife's will, they too are old enough to understand that they must abide by her wishes. It would be terribly hard for them to decide to turn off the machine but thankfully that choice was taken out of their hands.