how to turn around a pathetic life? im really depressed?

Question

im in my early 30s, as a teen i was skipped from 7th to 9th grade but i ended up dropping out of high school twice. (long story) I eventually got my GED 10 years after i was supposed to graduate. I went to a community college 3yrs after i got the GED, i only took 2 classes because i was working (math and english) then i dropped out of college. A year later i enrolled in a trade school for HVAC (air conditioning) for a 9 month program..i did graduate. However, i ended up not liking that field and went into something else. Now, im not satisfied with my life and i want to get a bachelors degree but im afraid i may fail and at my age failure isnt an option. in high school, i was a C or D student (closer to a D avg. and got alot of Fs). I dont want live like this and i feel getting a degree is my only hope. what should i do? i have a wife and several kids..how can i succeed? who do i need to consult? who can help me?! PLEASE HELP!

Answer 1

Sounds like you've been through some rough stuff. I think the most important lesson here would be for you to focus on your studies, and keep believing in yourself.. I know that can be easier said than done. Also, you say you were skipped from seventh to ninth grade. I am guessing that is because you were exceptionally smart. And if that is the case, than obviously you've got something going for you. I am a true believer in postive thoughts, and reinforcing what it is you want in your life to achieve it. If getting a bachelor's degree is what you really really think will help you, than go for it. I am sure your wife and children will be supportive of you. You could try talking to a guidance councellor at the school you are wanting to go to, to see what options they have for parents, mature adults, etc. Succeeding lies within your heart. Failure is never an option, no matter what age. Even when we feel as though we have failed, we haven't. We have just learned a lesson, and although sometimes it feels we have failed the same way over and over, it just means that we really need to learn and accept the lesson being taught to us.
Good luck to you in all your future endeavours, and never EVER give up on yourself.. if you don't believe in yourself, than who else will?

Answer 2

I've read through the responses you've received and although they offer great encouragement for you,they fail to mention specifically what you need to do.Because you are unable to determine what future career is best for you,it's essential that you get professional help which fortunately is easy and inexpensive to obtain.What you need to do is to take both an interest and an aptitude test.Then a professional vocational counselor can review the test results with you and make some education and career recommendations.I'm certain that you will be told that a bachelor's degree will prepare you for little other than graduate school so you will most likely be told that you need a master's degree to enter a new profession.Every town has vocational counselors who have private practices but you might be able to obtain the tests and counseling you need free at a state employment office or state college in your city.Do not question the recommendations of your counselor because you have made poor decisions for yourself before.Take the professional advice you're given and then run with it.You'll find the advice that a vocational counselor will give you to be the most important you have ever recceived.

Answer 3

Hurting yourself is not the answer. Depression can be a terrible thing when you have no one to talk to. Things won't seem as bad tomorrow. These people are not real friends. Friends don't turn their backs on you when things go wrong. True friends stand beside you, laugh with you, comfort you and try to make you feel better. Why give these ex friends the satisfaction of you doing something to harm yourself? They will only go on with their pathetic lives. Sounds like you are trying to stay on the right path and they don't agree. What makes you think that they are so right? Keep your chin up and get through today. I suggest you turn on some of your favourite tunes, nice and loud. Maybe tomorrow you can talk to a counsellor at school and they can suggest something about the situation at school. Good Luck to you.

Answer 4

It's O.K. I was there. (Kind of). My situation is different, but the same???

First off, you have enough life experience at this point to know that you need to have a direction that you want to go in which you can apply your education to. I didn't hear any mention of that.

What is it that your heart tells you you should be doing with your life? Not your Parents, Spouse, Children, etc..., Your Heart!
Learn to listen to it. The answers you are seeking are inside of you. It's all there!

As a parent, you cannot just drop everything and neglect your family. Nor can you neglect yourself and lay dormant in your situation. That's where most unhappy people blow it, I think...

listen to your inner voice, talk to your family about your feelings, and make an active plan (one step at a time) to begin doing something each day to move in the direction your heart tells you to. It's that simple! and that complicated! If you have a loving family (and I think you do as I hear a concern for them in your
plea) then you'll get through it!

Be kind to yourself!
Best wishes!
Steve

P.S. Like you said...you are in your early 30's. Trust me. You have lots of time! It's not too late at all. Many many people don't come into their own until this time or even later in life....

Answer 5

I don't think I am very smart but I did well in Junior College only when I didn't have other things on my mind and I got a study partner. Girls corrupted my concentration terribly.
Here, the Salvation Army offered a battery of tests to find your abilities and interests. Then you might be more realistic about your goals.
You might look into starting your own business. I think there is a lot of State or Federal help there.
You should have some small goals that lead to the big one.

Answer 6

i dont really know if i can answer your question, but i hope my story helps in some way.

i was the same way, skipped ahead because i was smart, then later, really started to hate school, and, well, hate pretty much everything. i skipped 140 out of 180 days in junior year of high school, and the other 40, i was late. not 5 minutes late, like 2 hours late. somehow, after a lot of summer school, and a lot of threats to kick me out of school, and a few encounters with cops, i graduated high school. unfortunately, the same trend started when i entered junior college the next fall. anyway, i was very depressed, all into drugs, all that good stuff, and the only reason that i would wake up in the morning was to play my guitar. sure, talking to my best friend, and even my psychologist, helped a lot, but without my guitar and my music, i would not be here today. now, i aspire to be a guitar teacher, not just because of the fact that music helped me (and continues to help me) through the roughest times of my life, but to open that door to someone in a future generation that might be in the same place.

not everyone is going to love music as much as i do, but i do believe that everyone has that one thing that they feel that they were put on this earth to do (as i feel with my music), the only problem is, not everyone has found that one thing yet. look for that thing, or if youre lucky enough to have already found it, surround yourself with it. do whatever you have to do, relate it to the rest of your life (for example, i write songs about different stuff in my life). find people who you enjoy being around, or even people, therapists are good for this, who you can just yell at, alot of times it feels good to just get stuff off your chest. and most importantly, relax, have fun

Answer 7

Consult God my friend! I had no idea what I wanted in life until my Father got sick and died. Now after taking one class, CNA, Certified Nurses Assistant course I have worked in Nursing homes and Hospitals serving the needs of others. Reach out with your heart. God will lead you never forget that. You said you have family, if you are good to them and do your best that is all that God requires. I will pray for you too. Have you watched the series in the link below? Try it.

Answer 8

I think im a little bit like you. From what i see,until now,you've only done things you dislike,just to guarantee a "life". I suggest you to write down in a paper,all the things you like,what you would like to do and what do you need to achieve those goals. If u focus on the one thing u would love to do and make efforts,be shore you can succeed!And its never too late for that!
But always try to give the best of you,without efforts,we can never achieve our goals! I hope all the best for you!

Answer 9

Everyone makes mistakes, so don't feel bad. It looks like you did something right by having a family. You graduated that HVAC program, and thats a good vocation, you should re-think it. As a father you need to ba a role model to your kids, so decide on something and stick to it. Some of us take longer to find our way. You'll find yours. good luck.

Answer 10

You need to find out what's keeping you from developing into the type of person you want to be and for that you should seek the help of a good therapist.