An "indecent proposal" towards me...?

Question

My husband and I went to breakfast at a cafe I used to work at, I went to say hi to the cook and see how his wife, who is a friend of mine, was doing.

While we were chatting he propositioned me! I kind of laughed it off and said "Not likely". I didn't know what to say, I was stunned!! I went back out to the dining room to head out and my husband had left and now he's acting weird. Apparently he got up about half way through the chat and was standing an earshot away. All he heard was the guy saying we should "get together" and me laughing before he walked away. I tried telling him what he said and what I said but he doesn't seem to want to hear it.

Then, do I tell the guys wife? I've known her for a couple years and I like her but she has serious jealousy issues with any woman he talks to/ works with, and will probably think i'm lying if I do say anything.

What to do?

Answer 1

Let it pass. Some people say stupid things sometimes.

Answer 2

Since these people are friends of yours, you are in a very difficult position. I wouldn't tell the cook's wife about the pass he made at you, even though it was wrong. It could end a friendship between you and his wife that you seem to value, and if he is soliciting other women it will come out in the open soon enough anyway. However, if you found out that something more serious was going on (such as an affair), or that he is doing this to several other women, I would talk to your friend- I'm sure you'd want her to do the same thing if she knew such crucial information about your relationship. As for your husband, I'd give him some time to cool down before you try to talk about it again. I know the conversation would upset me if I walked in at the time that he did, and he may just need some time before he is willing to hear what actually happened, so don't force it upon him.

Hope this helps, and good luck! You're in a tough situation.

Answer 3

I believe that is women because women wish to keep their breasts sacrosanct. There are many laws already in place, and since women do have the majority laws could be changed to allow women to be topless anywhere that men are. If that should happen, the breasts begin to lose the emotional attraction that they now have. Like going to a nudist camp/beach, etc., everyone begins to look for alike. The breasts are not "worshiped" in most primitive societies of South America and Africa, where they are not covered, they generally have no real sexual power over men when overly exposed for long periods of time. Someone could poke a man's chest, and no one would take that as sexual; if women wish to be the same (but different) the end result could be the same. I have gotten this opinion from listening and reading what anthropologists seem to say in their investigations of primitive tribes.

Answer 4

All you can do is reiterate the truth of the matter, and then ask your husband how he thinks you should handle it. By bringing him into it, you are more likely to lower his suspicions. Then, whatever he suggests (confront the guy, tell the wife, blow it off, whatever), ask that you 2 do it together. Tell him how uncomfortable the whole situation made you feel and that you need him with you for support. If he doesn't have the guts to go through the discomfort with you, or just decides to not believe you continues to distrust you, then that's his loss for not realizing what kind of great gal he married. For your sake, I hope he's mature enough to figure this out.

Answer 5

Let it go for now unless he starts again and then threaten to tell his wife. That will usually stop it. It just might be all the stress hes under too, so no use making things worse, so let it go

Answer 6

Don't tell the wife. She'll find out another way. Besides, she think you're lying and after her husband. Hopefully, your husband knows nothing is going on.

Answer 7

Try to have a conversition with your husband and explain everything to him so he know the entire thing. But no I would not try and tell his wife. If she is like you say she will probably turn it around and say that you did something to bring it on.

Answer 8

Obviously his wife has good reason to be jealous...her husband gives her good cause! You need to terminate contact, if possible with this couple and you need to deal with your hubby...ask him what if anything you can do to assure him that you did nothing inappropriate...if he doesn`t give you anything let it go and learn a lesson about putting yourself in difficult places...even unintentionally...

Answer 9

He may hit on anyone he can so laugh it off and don't ever go back there to eat. suggest again that you and your husband go out to breakfast and insist that you don't go there and give him the reasons and he should understand

Answer 10

if it's likely the lady won't believe you then let it be and deal with your husband first.

with out getting in his face try asking him if you have ever given him a reason not to trust you before. then point out it disturbed you that he seemed to refuse to believe you when you told him the whole story and talk it out from there.